Trudie Styler and Sting like 'tawdry' sex -- but really, who doesn't?

If Trudie Styler and Sting really do have the recipe for a lasting marriage -- apparently, tawdry sex -- then we say with gusto, get us to the tawdry church on time!

The former Police frontman and his wife, married for 18 years and together for three decades, explained to Harper's Bazaar that their thing works because they talk frankly about what they want, actually like each other and, at 59 and 57, respectively, make up for time apart by indulging in, well, each other.

"When we see each other, it's romance," Sting told the magazine. "I don't think pedestrian sex is very interesting."

Fortunately, wife Trudie fundamentally agrees. "Romantic?" she said. "We like tawdry."

Here at the Ministry, we like tawdry too. No argument on that at all. We're with them also on "pedestrian" -- it's difficult to do it while walking. Anyone out there agree?

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-- Christie D'Zurilla

Photo: Get your mind out of the gutter, friends -- Sting has his tawdry hand on wife Trudie Styler's *shoulder* at a 2006 Sundance Film Festival lounge in Park City, Utah. Credit: Evan Agostini / Getty Images

Comments

[JBam]

I say who cares? Is this all about a yuppie, Baby Boomer's revolt, or do they just want the press?

I've also heard, first-hand info, that when Trudie's not around wanting to be tawdry, that Sting frequents topless and strip clubs.

If he doesn't mind being tawdry, why not also mention that? Does Trudie not go with him, or just look the other way? They're hypocrities, the both of them, and always seem to be just dying for attention...

[Pam Guess]

I’m Sting, my highest purpose in this life?
Over-indulgence with my wife.
All day we shop and drink and eat,
All night we pound each other’s meat.

Like Pavlov’s dogs we salivate,
If dinner time is ever late.
We smack our lips and start to groan,
Like dogs with a delicious bone.

We’re proud that there is just no end,
To our capacity to spend.
Some morons donate all their dough,
We’d never be that stupid, though!

I love the pics in Harp’s Bazaar
‘Cause I look like a porno star.
Thanks to Adobe photo shop,
My saggy wife looks kind of hot.

I’m looking good, I’m lean and mean;
A sixty year old sex machine.
I know I’m smarter than the rest,
‘cause money does buy happiness!

Inviting thinkers to our home,
So we won’t have to drink alone.
Who cares what famous thinkers say?
When here, we keep them drunk all day.

I used to wonder which was me;
The Sting on stage or Sting/Trudie.
Now I don’t wonder who I am,
I just get drunk; who gives a damn!

My intellectual image is gone,
I flushed it all right down the John.
Pretentious ain’t what I’m about
Now I am “Sting the Drunken Lout”!