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Opinion: C-SPAN’s really, really big Christmas special sale

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Just four days left to go before Christmas. And you’re stuck on the perfect gift for that politics addict in your family?

Has C-SPAN got a deal for you.

It’s the essential cable channel’s famous national touring bus -- the one that went to all 50 states and all those schools and libraries to explain C-SPAN and government and how it sometimes works. The bus is up for sale.

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Think of it as the ‘Girls Gone Wild’ party bus -- without the girls, the wild, the liquor or cloture. No flashing. And a whole lot more clothing.

Finally, be noticed on your trips to the 7-Eleven. To school. Church. Or work. Get preferred parking at the next presidential debate.

Why go anywhere ever again without gangs of Brian Lamb groupies trying to board your bus, chanting: ‘Who do we want? BRIAN! When do we want him? NOW!

Live the faux high life of cable’s calmest conversationalist. The bus even has a fully operational back door for quick escapes in the event of something.

The sticker price for one used C-SPAN bus: Only $97,500. Odometer reading: Barely 506,434 miles. Contact: Heath Neiderer at area code 202 and then 737-3220; same line for Democrats, Republicans, even Independents. Topeka, you’re on the air. Tell Heath you saw this on The Ticket and earn a special discount.

But WAIT! There’s more!

C-SPAN is actually selling two (2) of these used buses. For just $97,500 more, C-SPAN will throw in a second identical bus at no further additional cost.

His and Hers? Call now. Operators are standing by -- if it’s normal office hours.

-- Andrew Malcolm

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Photo illustration: C-SPAN

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