Opinion: Breaking urgent cheeseburger alert: Obama orders cheeseburger at restaurant

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The breaking news out of Missouri can’t be overstated: President Obama ordered a cheeseburger Wednesday.

Although we don’t have the video footage yet, we’ve received the pool report that documents the crucial moment-by-moment account of what occurred when the president dropped by Peggy Sue’s Cafe in Monroe City.

We’ve pieced the report together to put this historic happening on the record.

‘How’s everybody doing today?’ the president is reported to have asked when walking into Peggy Sue’s.

Apparently there were roughly 10 diners in the restaurant when Obama arrived. We’ve asked the Park Service for an aerial surveillance photo to get the official estimated number.

A waitress named Jodie, described as being ‘unfazed,’ handed the president a menu.

‘I don’t think you just have cheeseburgers?’ challenged the president.

Perhaps stunning Obama, Jodie replied with: ‘Yes we do.’ No, not quite ‘yes we can’ but close enough. Secret code talk? Perhaps.

Then the plot thickens. Obama processed the information delivered by Jodie and then ordered a cheeseburger -- with fries! What makes it more intriguing -- if not astounding -- is the condiment selection: lettuce, tomato and mustard.

‘Let me get that to take out,’ the president said.

Then the president sat down and talked to the diners. About what, we don’t know. A reporter then asked Jodie what it was like taking the president’s order.

‘I take orders every day. He ordered like a normal person,’ she said.
Five minutes later, the president was reported to have left the restaurant. No word on if he enjoyed the cheeseburger.

Back with more details soon.

-- Jimmy Orr

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