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Opinion: What can (Scott) Brown do for you? Plenty, as both sides seek to u$e him

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What can brown do for you?

Or, more accurately, what can Brown do for you?

As in Scott Brown, the new political megastar from the Republican side of the aisle. All this guy from Wrentham did was drive around Massachusetts in his pickup truck (201,000 miles at last report), talking up a storm tapping into Obamaphobia and get elected to a U.S. Senate seat that hasn’t seen a nicely-suited GOP derriere since before airplanes like this one.

But that was -- geez -- way back on Tuesday evening. Now that it’s Thursday already both political parties are trying to tap into Scottmania.

You might expect the Republican Party, the old-fashioned one that often reminds you of that black-and-white TV set over at your grandparents’, to glom onto this handsome smiling dude with the beautiful, singing, basketball-playing pair of daughters.

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So party Chairman Michael Steele rushed out a fundraising appeal -- ‘Scott Brown and You’ -- with the smiling....

...visage of the one who triumphed in the Bay State ‘against all odds and millions of dollars from national Democrats, Big Labor and leftist special interest groups.’

So, strangely, has Arizona Sen. John McCain, who doesn’t have a whole lot of street creds with the Tea Party crowds.

But the reelection-seeking senator is nonetheless celebrating Brown’s ‘stunning electoral upset’ by circulating a petition to seat Scott-baby immediately as a correspondence cover for, well, as long as you’re at it, why not give us your e-mail and send in some money for the Country First PAC of which said John McCain is chairman.

Newt Gingrich, who hasn’t run or won an election since the last century, dispatched a message to his supporters headed, ‘Scott Brown won, now what?’

The former speaker suggests political paralysis is not good for the country, but remains opposed to the Obama-Reid-Pelosi ‘far-left agenda.’

What about a tri-partisan approach, the Georgian suggests, involving Republicans, Democrats and independents? And you can read more about it in his book ‘Real Change,’ now available with a special discount for recipients of that very e-mail.

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Now comes the Chicago machine crowd unaccustomed to losing elections anyway possible.

With a chutzpah that’s so brazen it’s almost admirable, good old Mitch Stewart, who’s running Obama’s never-ending campaign organization, Organizing for America, seeks to tap into the anti-Obama fervor of the electorate by claiming the president named Obama is sick and tired and frustrated too.

Yesterday’s disappointing election results show deep discontent with the pace of change. I know the OFA community and the President share that frustration.... Changes that aren’t controversial rarely solve the problem.Our country continues to face the same fundamental challenges it faced yesterday. Our health care system still needs reform. Wall Street still needs to be held accountable. We still need to create good jobs. And we still need to continue building a clean energy economy.

So, Stewart’s amazing argument goes, since the president named Obama whom you elected to accomplish these changes still hasn’t done that, won’t you please still donate some money to help him continue?

‘The President isn’t walking away from these challenges,’ Mitchell adds, which is -- wait one minute! -- hardly a heroic act since he spent $750 million of other people’s money to get the four-year job he’s only 366 days into.

The familiar clickable DONATE button is there for those moved to disregard Obama’s own recent plea to give to Haitian relief and instead give to help relieve the suffering over at Obama organizing.

If the Dramamine has kicked in, we have one more fundraising opportunity for you.

It’s a special double-DVD set from HBO about Obama’s inauguration -- two hours long and only one year late. Offered by the Presidential Inaugural Committee, which is either hanging around a very long time or really on the ball -- and optimistic -- for 2013.

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These DVDs recapture all the memories. Remember, the cold, the Lincoln Bible, the cold, Dick Cheney in that Darth Vader hat, the cold, and Aretha Franklin with that thing on her head? But there was no Scott Brown yet.

Twenty bucks. But they won’t ship ‘til a couple days after income taxes are due for your first full year under the Obama-Biden administration.

-- Andrew Malcolm

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