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‘The City’: Mixed signals in Miami

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When I’m watching ‘The City,” I often feel as if I’m watching beings from another planet. It’s just that the ladies ignore social cues that any human being would pick up on. This episode was doubly extraterrestrial to me, because it partially took place in Miami. My take on Miami is that it’s full of beautiful people, no one admits to being over 40 and they’ll take any chance to be naked. In fact, it’s a lot like L.A. times two.

Kelly Cutrone was on a rampage this episode. We’re used to her honest, brash personality, but this week she was super-sized. Even though the Miami team was already chosen, Kelly thought that Whitney Port and Roxy Olin could learn something on the trip. Whitney was to shadow Mara Hoffman, a designer and People’s Revolution client, but what was Roxy supposed to do in Miami? I’m still not sure. I guess you can never have too many helping hands.

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The night before the show, Whitney introduces Roxy to her friend, Nick (both apparently went to Harvard) at the Florida Room. This is where things start to unravel. Whitney excused herself, but said she’d be right back. Apparently Roxy didn’t hear her, since she was too into shaking her groove thing to pay attention. But Whitney told Nick, as well. In an MTV second, Nick was laying it on Roxy thick. She suggested they go somewhere else and they went. Poor Whitney returned to find they were gone.

First of all, Whitney has horrible judgment when it comes to picking friends. Second, everyone knows you don’t leave your friend at a club alone, especially not for some guy. Now, I don’t know how close Whitney is with Nick, but he surely should have suggested waiting for her, but he didn’t. What a pal! I have a feeling Nick’s thoughts were not originating from his upper half.…

The next day, at the show, Roxy shows up and it seems that it’s the first time Whitney has seen her since the Florida Room. Draw your own conclusions. All I have to say is, “Well played, Nick.” The ladies get into a huge “she said, she said” argument. Roxy claims that not only did she not hear Whitney, but she lost her cellphone as well. What she should have said is that she lost her senses. After the best montage of “people looking over at the argument” I’ve seen in a while, the gals grab Kelly’s attention. Of course she squashes the argument, then delivers the best line of the episode. “If you have a problem,” says Kelly. “Take it outside. This isn’t group therapy.” Yes!

Back in New York City…
Kelly let the gals know that the backstage cat-fight was unacceptable and that they probably should rethink working with each other. They could’ve gone scot-free, but then Roxy expresses her shock that Kelly didn’t say anything nice about their work in Miami. Way to unleash the fury, Roxy. Of course, Kelly returns with another round of verbal smack-down. Guess they don’t teach common sense at Harvard, huh, Roxy?

Elle magazine sent Erin Kaplan and Olivia Palermo to Miami Fashion Week as well. Erin was to do her regular public relations stuff, but Olivia got another editorial assignment straight from Joe Zee. I can’t believe that Joe actually believes that Olivia was still a good hire. Maybe he went to Harvard too. Olivia was charged with doing a trend piece from Miami Fashion week.

On the most uncomfortable plane ride I’ve ever watched (save that 9/11 movie, “Flight 93”), Olivia tells Erin that she’s only going to fashion shows. When Erin asks her if she’s going to trade shows, Olivia says no. Later, at the Elle party, Erin checks in with Olivia once more. And, once again she asks Olivia if she’s going to trade shows. Olivia says no again! Question: If you were Olivia and Erin asked you twice if you were attending any trade shows, wouldn’t you take that lead and answer, “No, but should I?” I’m actually going to give Olivia the benefit of the doubt for thinking that, yet still not asking. Why? As we’ve seen from previous episodes, Olivia is allergic to working hard. Pretty sure she breaks out in hives at the thought.

Of course, back at the Elle offices in New York, Joe asks Olivia and Erin for their reports from Miami. Once he realizes Olivia hadn’t gone to any trade shows, he goes ballistic on Erin for not guiding Olivia in the right direction. I actually give Joe some credit here. While I do think Olivia should have asked Erin pointblank if she should attend the trade shows, I also believe Erin should have told Olivia that it’s what Joe would have wanted her to do. Erin probably thought she did her due diligence by asking as many times as she did, but I think the truth is that not so deep down she probably wanted to see Olivia fail. Well, that backfired. I think Erin will be smart enough not to let this happen again. At least she looked hot at the Elle party!

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-- Jethro Nededog (follow me on Twitter @TheRealJethro)

Related:

Exclusive first look: It’s a melee in Miami on ‘The City’
‘The City’: The strange socialite thing
All ‘The City’ coverage on Show TrackerPhotos, from top: Whitney Port, left, and Roxy Olin in Miami on ‘The City.’; Erin Kaplan. left, and Olivia Palermo on ‘The City.’ Credit: MTV

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