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Looking for Mr. Good Enough

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Patti Stanger, TV’s Millionaire Matchmaker, went two seasons dispensing raw dating advice to wealthy mate-seeking men and the women who hope to love them while single. That has changed, though: Stanger, as her third season began on Bravo, announced her engagement.

Does it make sense to give relationship advice while not in a relationship? Apparently so. Take Lori Gottlieb’s buzz-generating book, ‘Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough.’ In it, she urges women to stop waiting for Mr. Right and instead grab tight hold of Mr. All Right. Gottlieb talked to scientists and psychologists in putting the book together, she told Salon.com:

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I’m the messenger. I’m the one who says, look: It seems to me, based on my observations, that women are looking for the wrong things, because the women I know who are super-happy in their marriages put a different emphasis on things than I did and that some of my friends who are still single did. So I went to the experts to find out what is important in long-term love, and are we looking for those things when we’re dating? Are we giving those things enough emphasis?

In an interview with KPCC’s Larry Mantle on Wednesday, Gottlieb mentioned that her book has elicited offers of dates from men all over. Which seems kind of logical -- write about dating, and then get dates.

Angelenos can ask Gottlieb for her advice in person on Monday. She’s appearing at a benefit event for 826LA, moderated by (married) Joel Stein, with Sascha Rothchild, author of ‘How To Get Divorced By 30,’ and Greg Behrendt, who wrote ‘He’s Just Not That Into You.’

After the panel, there will be an hour of cocktails and a singles mixer. Is there any chance of fireworks when women inspired by Gottlieb’s settling bump up against the men who fall into Behrendt’s not-that-into-you camp?

-- Carolyn Kellogg

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