All The Rage

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Envy, thy price tag is $910: Mississippi man wins one-of-a-kind trouser auction

September 2, 2010 |  1:30 pm


In the end it wasn't a Silver Lake hipster or someone headed to Burning Man that submitted the winning bid for Betabrand's golden, glittery, one-of-a-kind Envy Pants we told you about late last month. It was a network administrator from Oxford, Miss.

Christopher Simmons, 32*, who shelled out $910 for the pants, says he had already purchased a pair of the "gluttony" themed pants -- the first of a series themed around the seven deadly sins (wrath, greed, sloth, pride, lust, envy and gluttony). Then Simmons, who has a master's degree in archaeology with a specialty in archaeological geophysical surveying techniques (and an obvious sense of humor), read the tongue-in-cheek legend of "King Smut" and the 3,000-year-old trousers unearthed by a team of fashion archaeologists.

"As soon as I read that, I knew I had to have them," Simmons told All The Rage. "That, and the fact that they'd be an affirmation of my epic fashion sense."

Simmons said he has yet to receive the pants -- which are being made to his specifications -- but said they are en route and he is preparing for their arrival. "I've been going pantsless," he said with a chuckle, "to sort of cleanse my sartorial palate."

He said he doesn't think he'll debut the pants at a special occasion; he simply plans to wear them out on the town, perhaps paired with some of the vintage shirts he's inherited from his grandfather, "looking like a fine chocolate wrapped in luxurious gold covering."

And he's not done yet; Simmons told All The Rage he plans to complete the full "seven sins" series.

"Because now I'm the only person in the world who can actually have all seven," he said.

Sounds like the "greed" trousers might fit him just fine, no?

-- Adam Tschorn

Meet Envy, the rarest pair of the "seven deadly slacks" 

Belly up to Betabrand's adjustable-waist Gluttony Pants

Photo: Christopher Simmons, 32, of Oxford, Miss., submitted the winning bid of $910 for the one-off Envy Pants. Credit: Betabrand

[*UPDATED 9/3/10: In an earlier version of this post, Christopher Simmons' age was incorrectly listed as 22. He is 32.]