All The Rage

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Halloween hangover: Eating reject candy at the office is like dating loser guys

November 8, 2007 |  9:29 am

PumpkinAm I the only one working in an office surrounded by leftover Halloween crap candy? You know the types: Tootsie Rolls, Sweet Tarts, random candyRolls corns, and those circa World War II root beer barrels?

Now, I am not about to join socialite Tinsley Mortimer and start blogging about my caloric intake. That is insanely egocentric and puke-worthy.

But I will allow that I ate approximately 38 pieces of loser candy (I was swallowingManatee_2356_rockne_knuth the Tootsie Rolls before I finished chewing them!) the other day and I still feel like a manatee two days later.

Ladies: THROW OUT those sad excuses for confections that are scattered around public spaces. Eating that crap is like dating a cheapskate guy who checks out the waitress while you order. You can do better.

A13_p19_candy_sm Postcards_grant_450 There are plenty of Toblerones, Kit Kats and Snickers out there. Hold out for the right candy/man and you'll be much more satisfied.

Photo credits: pumpkin,; Tootsie Rolls, Tootsie Roll Industries; manatee,; Toblerone,; Cary Grant,