Oh no! YouTube's 'Fred' is both shrill and a shill

Oh no, not again 

At the suggestion of commenter Mark, I took a second look at the YouTube phenomenon called "Fred" to see if he was really a lone teenage filmmaker. Or if he was the front boy for some cloaked entity bent Pied Piper-like on hypnotizing millions of children with "entertaining content," only to lure them into some commercial trap.  You know, like TV.

Well I admit it hadn't occurred to me that these Fred videos would need corporate backing to be produced. They sort of seem like, I don't know, a hyperactive 12-year-old kid made them.  But call me a fool, because a link in Fred's description box sends viewers to a flashy, expensive-looking website called fredonzipit.com.  ZipIt, it turns out, is a handheld instant-messaging device — presumably to allow kids to IM each other from the comfort of their living room couch, kitchen table, desk at school, or anywhere else.  Because God forbid we should teach our kids that it's OK to go 90 seconds without filling in koolguyT0mmy94 or s1st3rSarah on your activities over the last 90 seconds, and go read a book instead.

So yes, I'm waiting for a call-back from Zipit themselves*, but I think we can go ahead and call this another viral marketing ploy.  And no point distinguishing ZipIt from the legion of other tchotchke peddlers that have been selling kids stuff they don't need since Moses was a tween.  Kids are such a big part of the YouTube demographic that this had to happen eventually.  It's just ... really with the chipmunk voice?

UPDATE (5:01pm): The truth is somewhere in between.  As it turns out, Fred—whose real name is Lucas Cruikshank—has been making amateur videos for some time, many of them with his two cousins.  Cruikshank was scouted by an L.A.-based ad firm looking for the next tween thing to anchor the launch of the Zipit product.  “Fred’s huge online following among teens and tweens, and their passion for the character, was just the magic bullet we were looking for in creating a new campaign for Zipit,” said David Abehsera, the President of WOO Agency, in a statement.  More details upcoming in a later post...

Comments

[VICTORIA]

I LOVE YOU YOU ARE SO MUCH CUTER THAN ZAC EFRAN

[kalie]

fred u is so sixy!!! LOL dont ask. (really u r!!! hahaha)

[Barrett]

It was only a matter of time before they used the star-making power of the Internet to seize upon the delicate consumerist lusts of this, the most fickle, easily diverted, and naive of recent generations. I'll admit, I originally thought this guy's videos were pretty funny, but the Zipit site was definitely a red-flag that set off my "Sellout Detectors."

Don't get me wrong; I'm a pretty ardent proponent of free markets and laissez-faire...It's just that this ploy was even more crass than usual. And what's worse, it was downright deceptive. As much as I love capitalism, artists are supposed to be immune to these baser instincts, especially when they're so young, and are sold to the public so laughably as "voices of their generation."

Well, maybe I'm out of touch with this generation too, despite being more or less a part of it at 24 years old. But I'm getting pretty tired of this tool for cranking out prefab disposable celebrities, the bread and circus of choice for today's chronically bored, bombed out, and boozed up emotional and intellectual reprobates. If this is Web 2.0, you can keep it!

---Barrett from Stallings, NC