Urgent Democratic vocab alert: Pelosi bans the S-word (stimulus)

Actually, it's understandable. And actually surprising that ex-House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-San Francisco) took this long. She must not be getting out much.

Remember way back in 2009 when D.C. Democrats were promising that the $787-billion you-know-what program was going to start you-know-whating the economy almost immediately with those shovel-ready projects that were going to keep unemployment below 8%?

President Obama even flew Air Force One almost four hours round-trip one day for a 10-minute speech to point out how well the you-know-whating was working in Ohio. The rate there is 9% now and, nationally, 9.1% with no new jobs created last month.

Other than that, all of Joe Biden's hundreds-of-thousands-of-new-jobs-any-month-now promises came true.

Fact is, utter the S-word in political conversation these days and chuckles are the most likely response -- if you're not among the 14-plus million officially unemployed. And the many millions of others who've given up.

Which Pelosi hasn't.

The S-plan didn't really S-anything sufficiently. But that's not stopping Pelosi et al from pushing yet another S-plan, this one maybe even bigger than the other one that didn't work. Can you say $1 trillion?

The unions would love it. And although their membership is only 11% of U.S. workers now, they make up a much higher percentage of the crumbling political base Obama needs to win reelection.

So, Pelosi has launched a campaign to pressure Obama to include some kind of gigantic "job creation" package in his grand Thursday night jobs address to Congress that will finally surely fix the nation's troubled economy once and for all.

He's had -- what? -- 961 days to get his economy act together and chew through all those economic advisors. Obama won't be calling his plans S-plans either. They'll be investments, which sound less lethal than another dying S-word, "spending."

Also, FYI, "Recovery Act" is also gone the way of the Obama administration's "man-caused disaster." Now, it'll be something about Made in America. Make It in America. That sort of thing. Which will make all the difference in the world.

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-- Andrew Malcolm

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Photo: Pelosi on Aug. 30. Credit: Ed Andrieski / Associated Press

Late-night jokes: East Coast quake also cracks Nancy Pelosi's hair

As The Ticket's 71,000-plus Twitter followers and 7,100 Facebook friends/fans know, we regularly share our daily picks of the late-night jokes of interest, usually before broadcast each night. Feel free to pass them on to friends using the "Share" buttons above.

Jay Leno: A new report out says that a growing number of Americans are worth $1 million. The bad news: Last year they were worth $5 million.

David Letterman: Things are looking really bad for President Obama. His job approval is way down. He's up there on Martha’s Vineyard again. And it looks like he may be voted off the island.

Conan O'Brien: Oprah Winfrey is returning to TV with a new show. That’s right, that’s how bad things are in this country -- even Oprah has run out of money.

Jimmy Fallon: A new study says eating healthy adds $380 to your grocery costs yearly. Or as Americans put it, ‘Cool, I saved $380 this year!’

O'Brien: A brawl broke out during Vice President Joe Biden's recent speech in China. Apparently, someone was blocking the exit.

O'Brien: The stock market plunged today and the price of gold is at a record high. In fact, the price of gold is so high, today an angry mob looted Mr. T.

Letterman: You know that big East coast earthquake, 5.8 down in D.C. It was so strong that Nancy Pelosi's hair actually cracked.

Letterman: As you know, President Obama was vacationing on Martha's Vineyard. It's really sad when your SPF factor is higher than your approval rating.

Letterman: If Libya's Kadafi goes, can that country get a functioning stable government? And if they can, for the love of God, will they show us how to do it?

O'Brien: Ford is working on a new automotive technology to enable your car to communicate with other cars around it.  The new technology is being called a horn.

Letterman: I tell ya tough times for President Obama. His poll numbers are way down. The other day he went for a walk on the beach. And the tide went out.

Letterman: Regis Philbin celebrated his 80th birthday quietly with his money. 80 years old. Oh, and firefighters have the cake under control.

O'Brien: The American Psychological Assn. says that workplace incivility is on the rise. I heard about that from one of my stupid employees who I'll probably fire.

O'Brien: A year after their rescue, those Chilean miners are still unemployed. Most employers hesitate to hire them because of the giant gap in their resume.

O'Brien: They have a new GPS device out with Yoda's voice. Is it just me? If you are getting turn-by-turn directions, do you really want someone who speaks backwards?

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-- Andrew Malcolm

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Photos: (top) Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-San Francisco). Credit: Yuri Gripas / AFP/Getty Images

(bottom) Yoda puppet that is. Credit: Stephen Osman / Los Angeles Times

Sarah Palin in Iowa for premiere of 'The Undefeated,' a new chapter in the politics of documentaries

 
 

Sarah Palin heads to Iowa on Tuesday, but whether or not electoral politics are involved is in the eye of the beholder.

Palin has to face jury duty in July in Alaska, but, according to the Christian Science Monitor, the former Alaska governor and her husband, Todd Palin, are first going to Pella, Iowa, for the June 28 premiere of "The Undefeated."

Filmmaker Stephen K. Bannon's documentary portrait of Palin and her political record goes into limited distribution by ARC Entertainment in AMC Theatres the week of July 15 (locally, it will be in the City of Orange, in Orange County).

Interestingly -- likely coincidentally -- President Obama will also be in Iowa on Tuesday, promoting manufacturing jobs in Bettendorf. No word whether the two have a date to split corn dogs, but we doubt it.

Approached by Palin's camp to produce short films for SarahPAC, Bannon decided instead....

What they're saying about Obama's plan to withdraw troops from Afghanistan

President Obama gave his latest Afghanistan war speech Wednesday evening, announcing his decision to withdraw 10,000 of the 100,000 U.S. troops there by the end of this year and another 23,000 by the fall of 2012.

His complete speech text is right here.

Here are some excerpted reactions to the president's decision from across the political spectrum.

GOP House Speaker John A. Boehner of Ohio:

I am pleased the president recognizes that success in Afghanistan is paramount. Continuing to degrade Al Qaeda’s capabilities in Afghanistan and the surrounding region must take priority over any calendar dates. It’s important that we retain the flexibility necessary to reconsider ...

Obama says he would resign if he was in Rep. Weiner's shoes

President Obama told Ann Curry on Monday that if he was the one whose private text messages, emails, and lewd photos to women surfaced, as they have in Rep. Anthony Weiner's case, he would step down from office. 

“I can tell you that if it was me, I would resign," Obama told NBC's Curry in an interview scheduled to air on the "Today" show Tuesday.

"When you get to the point where, because of various personal distractions, you can't serve as effectively as you need to, at the time when people are worrying about jobs, and their mortgages, and paying the bills — then you should probably step back," Obama told Curry in North Carolina where the president was visiting an LED lighting company.

En route to the factory, White House Press Secretary Jay Carney tiptoed around the answer when he was asked by reporters if the president thought the fiery New York congressman should take the advice of Nancy Pelosi and Eric Cantor and quit.

"The president feels -- we feel at the White House--that this is a distraction," Carney replied. "Obviously as Congressman Weiner has said himself, this is -- the behavior was inappropriate; the dishonesty was inappropriate.  But the president is focused on his job, which is getting this economy continuing to grow, creating jobs and obviously ensuring the safety and security of the American people."

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-- Tony Pierce
twitter.com/busblog

Photo: President Barack Obama is interviewed by Ann Curry at Cree Inc., in Durham, N.C., June 13, 2011 Credit: Pete Souza / The White House

Anthony Weiner's resignation now sought by a growing list of people who were not sexted by him

There are at least three prominent Democrats out there who have not yet suggested that fellow Democrat Anthony Weiner should resign from the U.S. House of Representatives -- Barack Obama's White House, ex-Speaker Nancy Pelosi and CNN's Eliot Spitzer.

They all have good reasons to steer clear of the Weiner mess. Why would a president, even one out of the Chicago machine, want to touch such a thing? Pelosi needs all the Democrats she can hold in her minority caucus -- and anyway she's from California.

And as the notorious Client No. 9, Spitzer walked into his own public sex scandal for patronizing prostitutes after prosecuting them, moving from one political scandal in office to another of spouting DNC talking points on CNN with low ratings.

However, elsewhere, the $174,000 congressional salary of the New Yorker Weiner seems in distinct jeopardy since he suddenly became more famous for his underwear (briefs), for what they were covering or not, for what he was sexting while on duty and for lying and concocting a phony hacker plot when confronted with the distasteful news.

Tim Kaine, former chairman of the Democrat National Committee, Wednesday suggested Weiner's public lying was "unforgivable and he should resign."

Admittedly, Kaine is himself running for office again (albeit only the Senate). So he could hardly be expected to endorse or ignore behavior involving even consensual sexually explicit online messages.

Then, Wednesday afternoon, Rep. Allyson Schwartz, a senior official of the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee, said Weiner should go. This one is serious.

"Having the respect of your constituents is fundamental for a member of Congress," Weiner's House colleague suggested. "In light of Anthony Weiner’s offensive behavior online, he should resign."

As his opening ploy to avoid joining the unemployment line after 10 days of lying, the seven-term Weiner this week appeared tearful at a news conference admitting his falsehoods and the allegations and sexting. He did claim that the half a dozen or so ongoing online and telephone relationships with women across the country were virtual affairs, not physically consummated.

While not suggesting Weiner resign, the often-speaking authority on pop stuff Dr. Drew confessed to his CNN audience that he had serious concerns for Weiner. "My fear," the doctor said, "is when all this really rushes in those moments that you see him looking so overwhelmed and so ashamed, that he could develop a severe mood disturbance."

In previous pathetic political news, Republican Rep. Chris Lee, who also drinks New York water, immediately resigned merely for posting a shirtless bathroom photo of his amazing abs. Weiner, however, is from New York City, which makes him far more important than upstater Lee.

Reince Priebus, chairman of the Republican National Committee, suggested that Pelosi's response, a simple call for a House Ethics Committee investigation, was empty and silly. "Do we really need an investigation to determine if this guy's a creep or not," Priebus said.   

Priebus, whose party now controls the House and is in position to take over the Senate next year, may want to rethink this approach. If creepiness becomes a bipartisan disqualification for Congress, neither chamber would likely ever have a quorum.

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, who represents Nevada, home to one of Weiner's more explicit virtual mistresses, candidly said he would like to defend Weiner.

But he could not.

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-- Andrew Malcolm

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Top photo: Anthony Weiner holds a sign to verify his identity in a photo sent to Meagan Broussard. Credit: ABC News. Bottom photo: Spitzer. Credit: Associated Press

According to Democrat Anthony Weiner, he lied, had numerous lewd exchanges, is sorry and won't resign

According to New York Democratic Rep. Anthony Weiner, who for the moment represents Brooklyn and Queens in the House of Representatives, he actually did lie about his Twitter account being hacked last week to send a lewd photo to a female college student.

According to New York Democratic Rep. Anthony Weiner, who is married to a top aide to Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton,he did in fact engage in serial online exchanges of lewd photos with other women during the past three years.

According to Democratic Rep. Anthony Weiner, he has engaged in online conversations with perhaps six women in recent years. He says he never actually met any of the women.

According to Maegan Broussard,a 26-year-old single mother in Texas, she was one of those women. She said she received the above photo (note wedding  ring) from Democratic Rep. Anthony Weiner during their online exchanges, ABC News reports.

According to Rep. Anthony Weiner, "I have not been honest with myself, my family, my constituents, my friends, my supporters and the media" and he is "deeply ashamed."

According to Andrew Breitbart, who broke the original Twitter story last week, numerous other photos involving New York Democratic Rep. Anthony Weiner have been made available to BigGovernment.com, at least one of which he will not be publishing becayse if its graphic nature.

According to House Democratic leader Nancy Pelosi,she is "deeply disappointed and saddened about this situation" for the following people: "Anthony's wife, Huma, his family, his staff and his constituents."

According to Pelosi, she is seeking a House Ethics Committee investigation to see whether any official resources were used or House rules violated.

According to Rep. Anthony Weiner, he has no intention of resigning.

According to recent history, Rep. Anthony Weiner is dreaming.

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-- Andrew Malcolm

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Photo: ABC News

Sunday shows: Palin, Paul, Barbour, Goolsbee, Cain

ABC's "This Week" with Christiane Amanpour: Austan Goolsbee, Martin Regalia, Chrystia Freeland, with  Herman Cain, Mark McKinnon, Dee Dee Myers, Jonathan Karl and Marwan Muasher.

Bloomberg's "Political Capital" with Al Hunt: Rep. Ron Paul (R-Texas).

CBS' "Face the Nation" with Bob Schieffer: Gov. Haley Barbour (R-Miss.) and Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.).

CNN's Fareed Zakaria "GPS": Nathan Myrhvold, Jeffrey Sachs, Kenneth Rogoff and Essam El-Erian of the Muslim Brotherhood.

CNN's "State of the Union" with Candy Crowley: Paul, Alice Rivlin, Goolsbee, Anita Dunn and Ed Gillespie.

Fox News Channel's "Fox News Sunday" with Chris Wallace: Former Gov. Sarah Palin (R-Alaska), with Bill Kristol, Mara Liasson, Kimberley Strassel and John Podesta.

NBC's "Meet the Press" with David Gregory: Preempted this week by NBC Sports coverage of the French Open.

-- Andrew Malcolm

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Photo: Jonathan Ernst / Reuters (Palin).

President Obama asks Congress to eliminate tax breaks for the oil industry

President Obama wrote a letter Tuesday to leaders on both sides of the aisle to start solving the pressing issue of rising energy costs.

In a letter to House Speaker John A. Boehner (R-Ohio), Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.)  and former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-San Francisco), Obama followed up on a statement Boehner made Monday when the speaker agreed that ending billions of dollars of tax breaks for hugely profitable oil companies is "certainly something we should be looking at".

"We're in a time when the federal government's short on revenues," Boehner told ABC News. "They ought to be paying their fair share. Everybody wants to go after the oil companies and frankly, they've got some part of this to blame."

Obama began his letter by saying that he wants the leaders to "take immediate action to eliminate unwarranted tax breaks for the oil and gas industry, and to use those dollars to invest in clean energy to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

The president blamed the spike in gasoline prices on increased demand and Middle East unrest. He added that old laws that benefit companies earning billions a year in profits aren't helping the average citizen or the recovery.

Rep. Michele Bachmann scores a prime early GOP speaking gig in New Hampshire

Move over, Sarah Palin.

The newest fundraising Republican rock star is Michele Bachmann.

The Republican State Committee of New Hampshire (as in, traditionally the first presidential primary state) has announced the three-term representative from Minnesota's 6th District will headline its prominent March 12 fundraiser in Nashua.

The outspoken Bachmann, who gave the Tea Party Express' detailed response to what's-his-name's State of the Union Address in January, has been doing a lot of traveling and talking and fundraising this year, accumulating political chits for who-knows-what someday.

Last fall, prominent Democrats including Nancy Pelosi unsuccessfully targeted Bachmann, sparking a conservative response that saw the Minnesotan build a reported financial war chest in excess of $10 million.

In January, the mother of five returned to her home state of Iowa (sound the caucus alarms!) for....