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Opinion: Spoiler alert: Rep. Michele Bachmann reveals ending of ‘Titanic’

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This article was originally on a blog post platform and may be missing photos, graphics or links. See About archive blog posts.

Where would this country be without the ubiquitous, finely focused eyes of C-SPAN recording everything having to do with those good folks of both parties in Washington and some of the goofy things they find themselves saying?

Anyway, Michele Bachmann, the voluble, second-term Republican representative from Minnesota’s 6th Congressional District, just north of the Twin Cities, spoke this week on the House floor, which isn’t too surprising since she’s a House member.

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She shared with a nearly empty House what she and her family watched on TNT last weekend.

We don’t want to spoil this compelling video for you. So we’ll just say that Bachmann likened President Obama’s massive spending plans and ambitiously exploding federal debt’s impact on the United States to a certain British ship of the White Star Line that was said to be ‘unsinkable’ (you remember Molly Brown, right?). See photo above before the ship became history’s most enduring metal metaphor.

But some years back, when everything in the world was black and white, the ship set out on its very first voyage, much like, say, the very first few months of a brand-new presidential administration. Everyone was very excited with the ‘new’ vessel and brimming with optimism, hope, even overconfidence and pride for its promise of a new era.

But unexpectedly one night the big ship hit an iceberg that ripped a huge hole in her side (This was even before Rush Limbaugh was born).

The ice-torn gash caused serious leakage problems, and tons and tons of icy North Atlantic water gushed in, filling compartment after compartment after compartment, causing the ship’s bow to sink under the dark night’s waves while hundreds of people jumped into the really cold water, although some got onto lifeboats and a nearby ship ignored distress calls and more bad things happened. But Celine Dion was singing, so everyone felt pretty good and stayed calm.

We don’t want to spoil the movie’s ending either, although you’d think things turned out OK because we’ve seen that skinny Leonardo guy in many movies briefly since. So if you’ve been meaning to get over to the theater or haven’t read a newspaper since April 14, 1912, you might want to pass on watching this Bachmann video.

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And, for sure, do not scroll down or click the ‘Read more’ line below because you would encounter a disturbing picture or two.

The Bachmann House speech was at night -- like the ship incident too, come to think of it. So, as usual, The Ticket is here to bring you the news of American politics.

-- Andrew Malcolm

If you type in S-O-S right here X, absolutely nothing will happen. But if you click over here, you can get Twitter alerts of each new Ticket item. Or follow us @latimestot

Video: C-SPAN.

Photos (from top): White Star Line; Bettman; History Channel (Titanic’s bow now, Leonardo and Kate not shown).

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