Opinion: N.Y. Times blogger has sexual fantasy about President Obama

This article was originally on a blog post platform and may be missing photos, graphics or links. See About archive blog posts.

CAUTION: This item contains sexually explicit innuendo about illicit sex involving a New York Times blogger, and a number of her female friends, with the nation’s new commander-in-chief, Barack Obama. These images will not surprise Sen. John McCain, who’s going on 73, remember, but may be disturbing to other surviving Republicans and also maybe Mrs. Obama. Reader discretion is advised.

See, we suspected you were gonna continue reading. But it has come to The Ticket’s attention that Judith Warner, who writes the Domestic Disturbances blog on another website not previously known for its strong sexual content, had a dream the other day:

She was going into the bathroom to shave her legs but Barack was already in there taking a shower and her husband Max began shouting, not because there was a naked Democrat in the married couple’s bathroom with his wife, but because the nude president was smoking, which, as pretty much everyone except the new president seems to know, is not a healthy habit and is also, let’s be frank here, hard to do in the shower.

So naturally Warner promptly e-mailed numerous friends and confirmed her widespread private suspicion that many other women are also having sexual fantasies these days about the ripped president and what they could do to/with him within/without the White House with/without a divorce involving their own husbands and/or Michelle Obama.

Warner also writes about one dream (from Connecticut, of course) involving luring Michelle away from the White House on an alleged play date for her daughters and doing something with a tuna fish sandwich which we’re not even going to try sneaking by our editors, assuming some are left this morning.

It’s really sad the sordid depths to which some financially troubled newspapers will allow their websites and blogs to sink in order to attract readers in these turbulent economic times. Really sad.

Anyway, Warner decided to write up these private dreams on her blog for the liberal N.Y. Times, which is in such dire financial straits that it recently had to lay off conservative columnist Bill Kristol.

The candid collected Obama dreams got a few people talking.

And one thing led to another -- we’ve all seen how some people use sex to sell almost anything --and Fox’s Sean Hannity got to talking with Bernie Goldberg, whose former CBS colleagues don’t talk to him a lot anymore. It may not surprise you to learn that conservatives Sean and Bernie do not have sexual fantasies about President Obama.

But the pair do have this crazy notion -- call it a fantasy, if you like -- that a lot of people in the U.S. media are in love with Obama. No, not that way. But, you know, in the tank for him.

They claim to see all kinds of adulatory news coverage of the tall, dark, handsome, strong, intelligent, eloquent, loving father with the perfect teeth and grin, the well-endowed ears and the two darling little girls, who was raised by a devoted single mom and went to Harvard anyway and rejected lucrative law firm salaries to work so hard to improve the lives of poor South Side Chicagoans before overcoming immense odds to win state, federal and presidential elections to lead America into a new era of hope.

And it only cost $750 million.

And now, 25 days in office, the 44th president is already being compared to Abraham Lincoln. Although in his years Lincoln faced a few things like Civil War and Obama so far has cheered for the Pittsburgh Steelers and watched some Cabinet nominees quit.

In fact, Bernie has turned this obviously cockamamie media fantasy into a new book, ‘A Slobbering Love Affair,’ in which he’s fairly critical of the media, which is to say downright denunciatory. Bernie was willing to talk candidly on television about his new book now available in stores. And as a member of the media himself, Sean was, well, pretty much in the tank for Bernie’s book.

You can read Warner’s appallingly provocative blog item here and watch Hannity and Goldberg discuss it/her here.

But if your reading experience lasts four hours or longer, you should consult a medical professional.

--Andrew Malcolm

While you’re waiting to see the doctor, register here for Twitter alerts on each new Ticket item. RSS feeds are available over here. And we’re now on Kindle as well.