Santa Ana winds: Get ready for some gusty high school football fun

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The last few days, Southern California has really been getting hammered by, of all things, WIND! Gale force winds have been howling thru the southland, taking away power lines, trees, small pets.... and pretty much anything that isn’t welded down. I think I saw a Hyundai go flying by my office this morning!

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If this keeps up thru Friday night, football coaches are going to have to rethink their pre-game coin toss strategy. I mean, think about it! A player with average speed is going to be twice as fast, running with the wind. Of course, running into the wind, is going to make a 4.5 40 guy look like a prime recruit for the ‘Fighting Slowpokes’ of Molasses High! The funny thing though, will be watching kickers and punters. Their averages won’t change much, because they’ll most likely have a kick or two of ‘minus’ 12 yards, but not to worry.....they’ll be mixed in with a couple of 70-yard bombs that finally touch down somewhere out in the parking lot! It’s going to be GREAT!!!!!!

The refs are in for a long night too. They’re going to have to keep their whistles in their pockets otherwise we’ll have a constant stoppage of play due to ‘wind-aided’ whistling, and can you imagine coming out your front door on Saturday morning....to find twenty-three yellow flags all blown up into the corner of your patio, from the football field across the street?! It’s going to be GREAT!!!!!!

Other parts of the game are going to be impacted as well. I hear some schools won’t be allowing their cheerleaders to be thrown into the air, for fear they may wind up down the street in a different stadium. Mascots with ‘larger than life’ heads are being encouraged to ‘strap it on tight’, as there is a REALLY good chance this night is going to produce some epic YouTube footage starring them....doing ‘The Tumbleweed’ across the field. And Tuba players.....well....Tuba players are being encouraged to suit up with the football team, because it’ll definitely be safer playing football, than playing that dang ‘wind tunnel’ tomorrow night! It’s going to be GREAT!!!!!

As a coach though, I’m really looking forward to Friday night. Because I have a little extra ‘junk in my trunk’, I’m not going to have to worry much about blowing away (although, if I fall down I may ROLL all the way to Hemet!). With the howling wind, I’m going to be able to say anything I want to the refs without them hearing me (they don’t listen to me anyway). And when the final whistle is dug out of the white hats’ pocket and blown....the high school football season will be down to one last week....CIF Finals! It’s going to be GREAT!!!!!

See you at the stadium!

--Dane Johnson

RELATED:

High wind forecast: ‘It isn’t over yet’

California windstorm: Widespread damage, more wind coming

Santa Ana winds: 42 buildings red-tagged in Pasadena

The Times is pleased to have Dane Johnson blogging his thoughts on high school football throughout the season. Johnson, a football coach at San Dimas High, has been a football coach for more than 20 years in the San Gabriel Valley and is also a pastor at Christ’s Church of the Valley . CCV is providing over 1,000 needy children and their families with gifts and toys and entertaining the masses with a holiday musical performance, ‘The Sound of Christmas,’ December 14 and 15 at Azusa Pacific University. To learn more or request tickets please visit www.ccvsocal.com/sharetheseason.