Resisting pressure

Nick Giulioni writes:

My parents have raised me well. They have taught me to hold doors for ladies.  They have taught me to take responsibility for my actions.  But most important, they have taught me how not to succumb to the pressures of life.  They have taught me to deal with my problems, not avoid them, especially not with drugs.  This they were adamant about.

After South Pasadena’s grand opening of the $3-million “Field of Dreams,” where the Tigers christened the field by defeating the La Cañada football team, I should have felt ecstatic.  I should have stormed the field with my classmates to celebrate the win.  Instead, I found myself taking the keys away from two friends who were far too drunk to drive.

While people may scoff at such a small issue as several high school students drinking, it was a serious reality check for me.  I realized how peer pressure and stress affect morally strong people.  One of the students in particular shows so much potential.  He is smart, funny, and polite in addition to being one of the best athletes I know.  But he buckled under the pressure.  Everything in his life, from growing up to dealing with repeated injuries to thinking about his future got to him, and it was simply too much for him to deal with.

I pride myself on not drinking, even if that means being the odd man out.  I deal with my anxiety in my own way, whether it is throwing my cell phone across the room, slamming doors, or just yelling at my parents.  But last Friday was almost too much for me to bear as I witnessed my friend in such a state of delirium, the world whizzing by him in a blur.

I’m positive that thousands of underage students drank alcohol (or worse) across the country Friday night for a variety of reasons.  It just makes me sick to my stomach to know what some of those students experienced as a result of getting drunk.  The only solace I find is the hope that these thousands of students also have a responsible friend to relieve them of their keys and take them home safe and sound.

By engaging in such dangerous activities, these people are not merely dulling their pain but amplifying their responsible friends’ stress and straining their relationships.  As long as I am able, I will be there for my friends in their times of need.  But I have to admit that I was terrified that night.  Nothing I have faced is as scary as my friend not being able to recognize my face, and possibly be in a life-threatening situation from alcohol poisoning.

Why do capable students filled with unbelievable potential make choices that jeopardize themselves, their health, and their futures? Can being there to carry them home bring them back from that edge?  Does taking their keys and taking them home to face the music help or hurt the situation?  Does leading by example have any effect?  Honestly, I don’t know.

Comments

[dana]

Wow! As a parent of a high school student this really hits home. We do our best to instill the right values and put the structure in place to help our kids do the right things. But, as young adults, they increasingly make more and more decisions for themselves, outside of the watchful eyes of mom and dad. Thanks, Nick, for reminding us of the role friends can play. Making sure that our kids hang out with the right people may be our last (and best) line of defense. I hope my kids have friends with the kind of judgment it sounds like you have.

[Nancy]

Because Nick, not everyone enjoys the family structure that you are grateful to have. I see that limitless potential everyday in my classroom coupled with an inabilitiy to constructively respond to social or personal pressures. It's amazing to me that these students are not aware of their uniqueness.

[MEH]

You're a good friend and have a good head on your shoulders.

[Monica]

As a high school student, probably 25% of students would actually be responsible enough like Nick. Yeah, at times I feel preassured to fit the party animal type, and if not then I wont't be cool enough. But then I realize that if I put myself in situations, like too drunk to drive, I may end up regretting the consequences. Personally, I would do what Nick did, and be the sober, responsible driver in situations like those. We cannot be selfish and risk other people's lives. It's not always just about us. We see it mostly in celebrities, the whole, managing to obtain a DUI. It's defenitely not a pretty picture.