Paul V. Coates -- Confidential File, June 6, 1959
June 6, 2009 | 2:00 pm
Mash Notes and Comments
(Press Release) "Recently, Don Porter saw an elderly lady standing at the curb of a busy street.
"Going up to her, Don said, "Are you going across?"
"The old lady took his arm and started off. At the other side, the old lady turned to Don and said, "There you are, my dear, you are quite safe now. But never be afraid to ask anyone to help you across.'"
(signed) Aleon Bennett, Public Relations, 8273 Sunset Blvd, Hollywood, 46.
-Next time, ask a boy scout, Don. They don't give you all that lip.
"I hope you will not be offended at the use of the first name, but being that we are both in the same 'age group,' I have taken the liberty.
"I'm not in the habit of writing 'fan' letters but I felt I just had to this time, to let you know how much we enjoy your program; particularly the one when you presented one of the cinema GREATS - Ramon Navarro.
"The whole program was such a joy to listen to, and it was so wonderful to find Mr. Navarro was the wonderful person I always believed him to be.
"I've been in small theater groups in and around Hollywood quite a bit and know how many phonies there are. It just gave you a real tug.
"I'm a hairstylist, Paul, and one of my patrons (who is also in our 'age group') and I have the best time just talking over your program and reminiscing.
"Well, enough of this and back to the old grind."
(signed) Bernard Carroll, 185 D St., Tustin.
-Tote that bob, lift that bang, eh, Berny?
"I'm glad there is one real journalist who is not afraid to speak his mind and expose the Beverly Hills petty tyrants.
"You are right about the Beverly Hills police. If they don't find violations, they create them.
"I know from personal experience.
"Before I became a Californian, I was attempting to park in Beverly Hills. My car was stopped preparatory to backing into a parking space.
"A motorcycle (three-wheeled) officer pulled up behind my car, preventing me from backing up.
"He greeted me with a surly questions, "Where do you think you're going?"
"I said, 'I'm going to park there,' and started to back into the parking space.
"He said, 'You foreigners (I had Illinois license plates) think you can come here and run all over us, but I'm going to teach you a lesson.'
"He then proceeded to give me a ticket for DRIVING BACKWARDS."
(signed) Les Norman, 8770 Shoreman Dr., L.A.
-If you don't like it here, why don't you go backwards where you came from.