Matt Weinstock -- May 29, 1959
May 29, 2009 | 4:00 pm
"A Speed Never Before Reached by Man!"
Only in CaliforniaThere
are in our city a large number of newcomers who constitute what Doris
Steele, TV producer recently transplanted from New York, calls the We
Love California But club. They're trying to get accustomed to the wild
pioneer life here but they haven't quite made it. Meanwhile, they chat
almost daily, usually by phone, and exchange happy tidbits and report
They find freeway traffic so alarming that they sometimes travel miles farther than they intended because they can't edge into the proper lane. If you see someone hanging out the window, signaling frantically, that'll be Doris, hoping a gentleman somewhere in the maelstrom will permit her to cut in ahead of him.
LATELY SHE HAS BEEN ENCHANTED by a sign in Ventura stationery store, "Courteous and efficient self-service," an ad for screens in a San Fernando Valley paper stating, "Hang yourself. Save 25%." And a starlet at a party who remarked that she had just dined on "peasant under glass."
This is to assure these newcomers that in time they'll find the natives friendly and the quaint customs tolerable.
BY CHANCE Maurice Ogden tuned in on this smashing non sequitur, committed by two passing secretaries, discussing a third:
"She doesn't pay any attention to her figure or her hair or anything. What does a person like that have to live for?"
"Maybe she plays the horses."
It's sad I have no boat,
To attract a Joe or Jim,
Perhaps the right Bikini
Would put me in the swim.
- JUNE R. DRUMMOND
A MAN NAMED George came down with a bad cold and stayed home from work on a day his wife was having the girls in for cards and gossip.
As he lay in bed, a quivering mass of sniffles and aches, he couldn't help hearing the gay chitchat in the other room.
Out of the confusion of voices came one, loud and clear, saying, "Well, the biggest mistake we ever made was giving them the vote!?
That's where we are today fellows. The ladies have taken over to the point they think they gave it to us.
THOSE TEA CAKES or fortune cookies you get in Chinese restaurants are another L.A. first, Malcolm Letts reports in his business newsletter, Expediter. Their origin is credited to David Jung, owner of the Hong Kong Noodle Co., founded in 1912.
They are baked at the rate of 3,600 an hour -- 900 on each of four baking wheels. They come out flat, then operators place the printed messages in the center and fold the still soft cakes.
As for the fortunes -- about 4,000 different ones are used -- it's too bad some descendant of Confucius isn't around.
A TAXPAYER who recently watched the City Council in action put it this way: "Even in science fiction you never saw anything like it!"
AROUND TOWN -- A thought from Robert Crawford: How come no one thought of seeding the rain clouds hovering over this area the last few weeks to relieve the drought? A chemical nudge might have done it ... Biggest surprise for Frances Hov, retiring journalism teacher at Belmont High, at a dinner in her honor, was a message from Flora Reed, her 2nd-grade teacher in Hillsboro , N.D., now living in Pasadena. She wrote: "As a 7-year-old she was a joy in my schoolroom and I have been proud of her ever since" ... A brave pair of birds built a nest in the CBS TV City parking lot at Beverly and Fairfax and the guard has placed four sawhorses around it to protect the four spotted eggs in it.