Matt Weinstock -- April 4, 1959
April 4, 2009 | 4:00 pm
TV Cliches Shocking
About a year ago a registered nurse inquired here what the frontier doctors on TV wanted with all the hot water they were forever demanding when about to deliver a baby. Her inquiry raised quite a storm. The gist of most of it was that the doctors' peremptory command, "Boil all the water you can!" was merely a diversion to get the men folks out of the room.
She refused to accept this corny explanation and resolved never to bring up any more TV medical cliches.
SHE HAS BROKEN her resolve. She finds herself curdling every time she hears a TV doctor say, "She (or he) is in shock." Usually the patient has had an unpleasant experience.
But witnessing something shocking, screams I.R.N. (Irate Registered Nurse) is not being in shock. Shock is brought on by severe pain, loss of blood or other body fluids. It is a dangerous state and death will result if immediate anti-shock treatment is not started.
And if the teleplay boys don't cut it out I.R.N. will go into shock.
WHILE IN Birmingham recently to appear at a benefit for retarded children, Pat Buttram of CBS visited his father, Rev. W.M. Buttram, 85, of Anniston, Ala. When he showed his dad pictures of his new Northridge home with swimming pool, the old gentleman commented, "Well!" Pat's got a washin' hole in his back yard."
Some people like to dice
Some just love to give advice,
Some may preach and some may pray,
While some just yack the livelong day.
A favored few converse with squirrels,
But I'd much rather chat with girrels.
STU GALBRAITH has built up quite a guilt complex over what happened last Sunday in San Fernando Valley and wishes expiation here.
He was driving on Canoga Park Avenue toward the hills when he caught up with half a dozen slow-moving cars and trailers. As he passed, he gaily sounded his horn -- "shave and a haircut -- two bits." After all, it was a nice day and he was on his way to a party.
To his surprise, they fell in behind him and when he turned off onto a narrow road snaking off into the hills the trailercade followed him -- around hairpin turns and barely squeezing by parked cars.
Stu didn't know what to do and as he rounded a turn and came to his destination he gunned up the driveway and sat still as the trailer group streamed by.
He slunk into the house and after a while peeked out the window. The trailers were apparently wandering aimlessly up another hill. He hopes they got where they were going.
LOOK FOR controversy over Dr. Franklin Loehr's book, "The Power of Prayer on Plants," to be published this month. It presents evidence that prayer can be scientifically proved. Two trays of seeds were planted under precise laboratory conditions. One was ignored, the other received the attention of Dr. Loehr's prayer group. Analysis of 900 experiments showed that plants which had the benefit of prayer were superior.
FOOTNOTES -- Not all the streets and sidewalk hieroglyphics are put there to indicate projected sewer, storm drain, utility or street work. Some are for the guidance of bill peddlers and house-to-house distributors of samples -- so they won't cover the same ground twice ... A four-page press release headed "The Recession in the Congo" states there is uneasiness about the economy there. To put it another way, the natives are restless ... Shame on somebody, attributing to Frank E. Marlowe the gag about people who jaywalk repeatedly having their shoes taken away. It's in Mort Sahl's record, "Look Forward in Anger" ... Mac Tuesley, taking a quick course in photography from Otto Rothchild, says he keeps forgetting to pull the slide. "I can't teach you anything about that," Otto said sadly.