Matt Weinstock -- April 2, 1959
April 2, 2009 | 4:00 pm
Petty Crime SolvedHaving a little time to kill before a critics' preview of "The Naked Maja" the other night, United Artists publicist Roy Smith looked in a pet shop at 10650 W. Pico Blvd. A light was on so he tried the door. It opened and he went in.
No one was in sight so he called out, "Anybody here?" A faint answering "Hello" came from the cavernous rear of the shop. "Don't bother, just browsing," he said, inspecting the rows of cages and fish tanks.
Ten minutes later, as he headed out, he noticed the cash register was open, with money showing. Then he heard the same muffled voice in the rear calling, "Help, help!"
Envisioning a holdup and maybe a little mayhem, Roy summoned police and a nearby druggist phoned the pet shop owner. The mystery was quickly solved, amid laughter. The front door had accidentally been left unlocked. The owner said he had left the register open. As for the voice, it was probably some lonesome parrot.
NO, NOTHING is sacred any more. Melvyn Douglas, here rehearsing for an upcoming "Playhouse 90" drama, was walking along the beach at Laguna last Sunday with Jackson Leightner when they came upon a beautifully executed sand sculpture of Christ. Alongside someone, presumably the artist, had lettered, "Happy Easter,Cha Cha Cha."
I rather think my voice is choice
And I guess my friends do too,
For when I sing they all rejoice
The moment I am through
ONE DAY, while trying to explain adjectives to an 11th-grade English class at Arroyo High School in El Monte, Marcia Lander asked a boy named Darryl, "What part of speech is the word 'selfish?' "
"A noun," he replied.
"A noun?" she echoed. "Can you buy a selfish, see a selfish?"
"Why, sure. You know, when you go ocean fishing you sometimes catch selfish."
Miss Lander saw the light but still doesn't know whether he meant shellfish or sailfish.
ONLY IN North Hollywood -- Rosetta Case Bent needed a cowboy hat for a PTA show and went into a store that supplies them to the studios. They were costlier than she expected, so she asked about a used one. These, she learned, were more expensive than the new ones. Logically, no cowpoke could be expected to bring the villains to justice wearing a new Stetson.
ONLY IN GLENDALE -- Glancing out the window of her home on Allen Avenue, Lena Cook saw a police car slowly weaving from one side of the street to the other. A closer look disclosed the driver was herding a steer back to the railroad car from which it had escaped.
CALL ME antisocial and inconsiderate. Say I'm picayunish and unappreciative. I can only state that I have declined an offer to judge a pizza eating contest, for which I am awarding myself a mozzarella cluster on my Good Conduct medal.
AT RANDOM -- Every day on the L.A. to Playa Del Rey bus a man and woman play cribbage. The other passengers hold her seat until the bus gets to the block where she gets aboard ... The Better Mottoes Association selection for the month is "Are you a man or a mouse? Come on, squeak up!" ... Under the heading "Above and Beyond" the California Highway Patrol annual report reports, "In attempting to unsnarl an Echo Summit traffic tie-up during a snowstorm, aCHP officer discovered the cause for the delay was an elephant pushing a disabled circus truck up the grade" ... J. Stuyvesant Fish is still quivering from a grammatical gem he heard during a radio interview. A participant agreed to a point by saying, "That is very so."