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Matt Weinstock -- April 15, 1959

April 15, 2009 |  6:00 pm


 

Prize for Pungency


Matt_weinstockdEvery year the San Francisco Chronicle has a crayon drawing contest for youngsters. Top prize is $25. Among this year's entrants was a bold, impressionist drawing of a pig delivering the Chronicle to a farmhouse, sent in by Roselita Gomez, 11, of Elk, Cal. It didn't win.

A few days after the winners were announced the contest editor received a letter from Roselita stating bitterly, "You work and work and work and all you get is a kick in the pants." (She used another word.)

It was the feeling of the staff that no one had ever said it better and they chipped in and raised $35 -- $10 more than first prize -- and sent it to Roselita.

Now when a discouraging word is heard in the Chronicle city room, the complainant is warned he better be careful or he'll develop a "Gomez complex."

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April 15, 1959, Mirror Comics ONLY IN L.A. -- A girls' group planned a hayride and one of them called Information and asked if there were any horse stables in the area. "How do you spell the last name?" the operator asked ... A downtown editor received a printed invitation requesting "the pleasure of your attention" to a TV program -- with an RSVP. If this is living modern he doesn't know if he can stand it.

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SPRING IS FOR THE BIRDS

Oh joyous robin of the spring
I too a sprightly song would sing.
Were I forever free , as you,
From internal revenue

-- Guy Mullen

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THE PHONE RANG at William Adams' home the other night and a recorded voice told him he had won a set of carving knives sponsored by a vacuum cleaner company and asked when he and his wife would be home for a demonstration.

Fascinated by such salesmanship, he phoned the number given in the message and reported that he was unmarried. This disqualified him, he was told. "We only give out knives when there is a demonstration to both husband and wife," the lady said severely.

The remark haunts him.

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PITY THE poor, confused writer in an era like this.

Weekly Variety has this item: "It's an open secret that Hollywood is giving originals the brush." In an adjoining column, this: "After a period of decline the original screen story is coming back to Hollywood."

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April 15, 1959, Abby THERE'S A STORY going around about a boy who unaccountably stopped talking. His parents took him to one psychiatrist after another but he failed to respond. Then, one night at dinner, he exclaimed, "My bread is not buttered!"

The parents excitedly called in the neighbors. Everyone waited to hear his next words. Despite coaxing, he remained silent.

"Johnny," his mother soothed, "We know you can talk. But why in the world when you started talking again did you say such an unimportant thing as 'My bread is not buttered'?"

"Well," he replied, "up to now everything has been all right."

::

AT RANDOM -- A man pushing a market shopping cart on Imperial Highway in Downey was waving a red kerchief to ward off motorists, who honked anyway ... Some City Hall saboteur is sending out disparaging comments about Norrie [Mayor Norris Poulson -- lrh] on office memo stationary ... Ivan Nemo hasn't quite recovered from a sign on Highway 395 between Riverside and Escondido, "Eat and Gas 500 Feet"... Radio people are talking about the interruption on a religious program last Sunday on KHJ. As the minister said, " And God said..." the announcer broke in with, "This is a SigAlert bulletin!"


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