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Dear Abby

March 3, 2008 |  7:50 pm

March 3, 1968


Let's get this straight: Your son rummages through your purse and takes money, he shoplifts and there are items in his room that he didn't buy. And you ask, "Am I raising a criminal?" The short answer is, "Yes!" Consider a field trip to your nearest state industrial school for boys ... or visiting your Marine recruiter for a travelogue on exotic getaways to MCRD San Diego. Then again, he might have a bright future in the Nixon White House ...  Dear Loves to Dance, I suppose that depends on whether you two are doing the Freddie or the Watusi  ...  Dear Mother, have you considered borrowing one of those giant fake checks your local golf tournament uses in its publicity photos? Just a thought ...  Dear Odd Couple, I think it would be best for all concerned if the bride didn't try to feed the groom some of the plaster wedding cake.