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Lisa Guerrero: Joe the Plumber sings ‘Monday Night Football’ song?

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Since 1989, Hank Williams Jr. has been opening ‘Monday Night Football’ with his souped-up, soused-up version of “All My Rowdy Friends.”

It may be time to turn the page and replace him with a new, up and coming country music artist who is sure to connect with ‘Monday Night Football’s’ fan base.

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Joe the Plumber.

As you’ve certainly heard by now, when he’s not fixin’ toilets, he’s fixin’ to be a country music star. Yesterday, he hired a Nashville publicist to help him fulfill his dream of hitching up his pants with a big brass belt buckle so he can croon his way out of our sewage pipes and into our hearts.

Being the crack reporter that I am, I’ve discovered the new lyrics to Joe’s version of ‘Monday Night Football,’ sung to the tune of ‘All My Rowdy Friends.’ Enjoy.

New ‘Monday Night Football’ theme song:

Are you ready for some Draino?
A Tuesday night house call?
I’ve got my friends Sarah and John,
And the folks at Fox News, y’all!
We’ve got the moonshine in the trailer
‘Cause it just ain’t right
That all my rowdy friends are gonna lose on Tuesday night!

Are you ready for some caulking?
A Wednesday hangover?
They can thank me next Tuesday
That their campaign’s over!
‘Cause I killed it when they found me
I’m just not that bright
So all my rowdy friends are gonna lose on Tuesday night!

Although I agree that this is very catchy, ESPN hasn’t signed Joe the Plumber just yet. Don’t worry, though. I’m sure they will.

After all, they’ve made some brilliant casting decisions at ‘Monday Night Football,’ which is why you get to enjoy Tony Kornheiser each week.

-- Lisa Guerrero

Lisa Guerrero has covered Super Bowls, the NBA Finals and the World Series, along with the Oscars, Emmys and Grammys. As an actress, she has appeared on ‘Frasier’ and ‘The George Lopez Show’ and as Billy Baldwin’s long-suffering wife in the film ‘A Plumm Summer,’ which she executive-produced.

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