Now that Charlie Sheen has said his piece in morning show interviews and a live feed on TMZ, it's becoming harder and harder to see "Charlie Harper" ever making his return to the CBS show that had its production shut down for the rest of the season.
So now begins the game of guessing how or with whom CBS and Warner Bros. will proceed Sheen-less with the cash cow of a comedy.
The likeliest option — besides just canceling the show — would be to bring in some kind of replacement. Everyone's replaceable in theory, and someone playing a shallow, womanizing bachelor who works in showbiz would seem to be especially replaceable.
Uncle Jesse ... is that you on "Two and a Half Men"? EOnline reported that John Stamos of feather-haired "Full House" fame — and a recent run on "Glee" — is in talks with CBS to replace Sheen. Stamos has denied any such thing, saying on Twitter last Friday: "Contrary to the rumors, I am not replacing Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men. however, Martin Sheen has asked me to be his son."
Who else might fit the bill? Matt Dillon did a hilarious turn recently as a hard-partying guy who never grew up on "Modern Family." The producers could keep it in the family and bring in Sheen's brother, actor-director Emilio Estevez. (I haven't seen him around much since the "Mighty Ducks" sequels, so he's likely available.) Or they could scrap the whole the replacement idea and build a bigger role for Holland Taylor, who plays the tipsy, manipulative real-estate agent mother.