'Celebrity Apprentice' finale recap: John Rich wins in a circus of a season

Who would have thought the finale of "Celebrity Apprentice" could make you a little misty eyed?

It was a bit emotional as we were reminded that this show was actually about raising money for charity and helping children.

Maybe good could come after the circus came to town, as Donald Trump proclaimed in the season opener. Maybe we shouldn't feel guilty for watching for hours, week after week, as  has-beens, never-will-bes and others prostrate themselves before the [fill in the blank] that is Donald Trump. Perhaps it was even charitable that we gave up our Sunday nights to watch NeNe Leakes call La Toya Jackson "Casper the Ghost,"  Meat Loaf toggle between fits of anger and floods of tears and Dionne Warwick squander the legend status that we were repeatedly told she had. 

It was for the children.

As the final two contestants — Academy Award-winning actress Marlee Matlin and country-music star John Rich — battled for $250,000 for charity, viewers were taken along with each star as they worked with their respective charities. Matlin traveled to Africa — where, exactly, on the continent they didn't make clear — to deliver hearing aids to deaf and hard-of-hearing children with the Starkey Hearing Foundation, her charity. Seeing the eyes of those children the first time they were able to hear sent a chill down my spine. 

The same passion was evident when Rich traveled to Memphis to visit the patients and families at St. Jude's Children's Research Hospital, his charity. He became teary-eyed as he performed before a crowd of children stricken with cancer and their worn-down parents. It was incredibly powerful stuff, and it was a reminder that both Rich and Matlin were not just hard-working and persistent players in a game, but also decent human beings.

But don't get me wrong: The finale did stick to its roots was still a continuation of the season-long train wreck.

RELATED: Marlee Matlin and her sign language interpreter Jack Jason

Surprisingly, Matlin and Rich have been the two on their best behavior all season. Matlin has been a straight shooter from the beginning, hard-working and something of a gyroscope, adding a measure of balance and reason amid the insanity. The same can be said of Rich, who, with his drawl, has been there to offer an eye roll and droll comment, expressing exactly what we were thinking at home. He had me frustrated, however, with the cowboy hat casting a shadow on his face in the live finale — it made him look like the phantom of the Grand Ole Opry. 

There's a lot to discuss, so let's break it down.

'Celebrity Apprentice' recap: And the winner is ... (find out next week)

I could say I told you so: I've thought from the beginning that John Rich and Marlee Matlin would be the ones to make it to the final episode of "The Celebrity Apprentice." Lo and behold, here they are.

It's hard to believe it has come this far after that first week, when I was trying to figure out who David Cassidy was and the boardroom was so packed there weren't enough seats. If there's any central lesson from this season, it's that sharp elbows won't get you to the finale, but having a sharp mind, that's the key. 

Week after week, we saw the manipulators (Star Jones) and the delusional (Gary Busey) go home, as well as some of the whiners (Mark McGrath) and the divas (Dionne Warwick — yikes!). Some good ones left too: Niki Taylor and Lisa Rinna (who, I admit, I didn't think I would like).

When Sunday night's episode began, the crew was down to four: Lil Jon, Meat Loaf, Matlin and Rich. Donald Trump called in his previous winners — Joan Rivers, Bret Michaels and Piers Morgan — to interview the final four and offer their evaluation to Trump. He would fire two based on their appraisal.

'Celebrity Apprentice' recap: Three hours later, three feuding stars fizzle out

It's a sign of the times at NBC that "Celebrity Apprentice" managed to stretch across three hours of prime-time real estate. President Obama might have interrupted last week with word of Osama bin Laden's death. This week, however, Obama had only "60 Minutes" to Donald Trump's 180. 

And it was a slog, even for the biggest "Apprentice" fans. One could have watched a movie or taken a nice Sunday drive in the time it took for one episode. (I don't even want to guess how long the finale will be!)

But it was worth the time in that the story lines have finally come together in a way that you may never have expected. A lot went down in those three hours, and the trail has been blazed to the finale. (In fact, I've decided who I think will win — more to come on that.)

It started off with a huge disappointment from NeNe Leakes. She just quit. All her hollering about how she would be the one who could put Star Jones in her place turned out to be empty threats. The heat even continued this week, when Jones said she couldn't move past last week's messiness with Leakes. Then, Leakes and Meat Loaf switched places on their respective teams. Instead of going along with it, Leakes just disappeared. Donald Trump called her a quitter and said that Jones had indeed kicked her ... rear end (hey, we're a family blog). 

But if you think Jones came out as a victor, you would be dead wrong.

'Celebrity Apprentice' recap: 'Where's Barbara Walters now?'

Sunday night might have served as a teachable moment for Donald Trump: Don't mess with President Obama. And not only was  the Donald skewered at the White House correspondents dinner but also last night his show was trumped by historic news of the death of Osama bin Laden.

The timing was anything but fortunate for "Celebrity Apprentice" viewers east of the Rocky Mountains, who caught only part of the showdown and missed who was sent packing. Those of us out west were able to see one villain vanquished only for a new one to emerge on what was an absolutely magnificent evening of reality TV.

I expect fans to be split into two factions here over who the villain is: NeNe Leakes or Star Jones?

I have to admit, I'm in Camp NeNe. I also readily admit her faults — she flew off the handle like a madwoman in front of the client (not so good) and got a little too riled up. But that's why I love her: She keeps it real, and she won't back down. She's God's gift to reality television. And to be fair to Jones, I thought it was noble of her to put personal differences aside to work on the task at hand.

For those whose regularly scheduled broadcast was interrupted, Leakes went off on Jones at the start of the evening. It was the result of Jones' manipulation in the boardroom last week, in which she practically coerced Leakes into helping her rid the team of La Toya Jackson (hold on for more on Jackson, for sure).

The towering Leakes bent herself like a desk lamp to inform Jones that she would be the one to stand up to her, even though the rest of the women had backed down. Too bad she did all of this in front of the executive for the hair products company they would be working for. "Where's Barbara Walters now?" Leakes says, taunting Jones. 

Leakes said she was upset because Jones had essentially preordained her to be project manager, as though it was part of the nefarious plotting Jones had been up to all season. (She did become project manager, as did Lil Jon for the men — after losing a game of rock-paper-scissors.)

Moments later, though, it was like Leakes had completely forgotten. They had gotten their assignment — to put on a hair show using this company's products — and she had kicked off a dance party with the woman, centered on her theme of "Shake Your Beauty." (I kept waiting for Dwight Eubanks to pop up with offer some pithy commentary, like a "fashion show with no fashion" all over again — "Housewives" watchers know what I'm talking about!)

The men, after some initial worries and wandering to nowhere with Meat Loaf, came up with a fun, patriotic-themed event. They also managed to get inside the women's heads by calling back Niki Taylor, who had been fired weeks before. If you don't recall, Taylor was a class act after her run as project manager, sacrificing herself because she said the blame for her team's loss could be assigned to no one but the manager. Now, she had some of her former teammates mentioning betrayal.

Another twist came when La Toya Jackson, who was fired last week, had a sit-down with Trump in his office. (Side note about his office: Were you as underwhelmed as I was seeing his personal office? On the "30 Rock" scale, it seemed more Liz Lemon than Jack Donaghy. I had pictured a desk of solid gold, a shark tank — at least a bust of himself on the shelf.) She proposed that she have a second chance; she got it — she's back on the show, on the men's team now, and turned out to be one of Leakes' biggest advocates in the boardroom. That in itself is a shocker, considering how just a couple of weeks ago Leakes' big target was Jackson.

The women lost what should have been a sure thing for them. Left in the boardroom were Leakes, Jones and Hope Dworaczyk.

Note: I made no mention of Dworaczyk before now. Like I said last week, she's basically become a piece of furniture on the show. Or, as Leakes put it, the intern there to do whatever Jones commands. When she did speak on the show, it was to whine about Leakes, as though she were Leakes' target. (It's quite clear that Leakes could not care less about her.) And Dworaczyk, who whined about always having to be the model (she's a former Playmate), stunk as a model, walking around the stage like a scarecrow with robot legs. 

Despite the NeNe-versus-Star showdown, it became clear that — SPOILER ALERT! — Dworaczyk was the one who had no place being there. No matter the vitriol between them, and how crazy they may be, Leakes and Jones are far superior players. Jones has, regardless of her manipulative ways, been a workhorse; Leakes has proved to be talented and hard-working and, when she's not confusing another player for Kim Zolciak, is never tardy for the party. Ultimately, Dworaczyk — who, Trump says, is a huge star now because of "The Apprentice" — was sent packing.

The war between dueling villains continues. In the strange world of reality TV, the survival of a villain is the reason for celebration. 

— Rick Rojas

Photo: NeNe Leaks with Eric Trump on "Celebrity Apprentice," talking trash about Star Jones, which shouldn't come as a surprise. Credit: Douglas Gorenstein / NBC 

'Celebrity Apprentice' recap: Star Jones is a shark, and she keeps on swimming

La Toya Jackson finally comes into her own on "Celebrity Apprentice," only to be shut down.

Timid and seemingly disconnected for most of the season, she sat to the side, following orders and offering excuses when things didn't work out. Up until this point, it seemed the key to her survival was Donald Trump standing up for her in the boardroom.

But then she teamed up with NeNe Leakes. 

Star Jones, in an interesting move open to a lot of discussion (Show Trackers, please discuss!), paired Jackson and Leakes, who had been bickering with each other, to work together on the project. Leakes has been Jackson's sharpest critic inside the boardroom and out. I suspect Jones thought that by making them work together, she would build in a little protection for herself. Ultimately, it did work, but not without showing a hole in her armor. 

This week was all Trump: Both teams had to create an ad campaign for Trump's hotels. Ivanka Trump was one of the executives consulting on the project. Donald's sons, Don Jr. and Eric Trump, sat with him in the boardroom. 

Both teams failed miserably. When it was revealed to them that the Trump hotel executives thought it was a decision of the lesser of two evils, they were stunned. You could see in their reactions that both sides thought that they really had pulled this off, when in reality they had both created quite amateurish campaigns that looked like they had been done by middle-schoolers with a desktop computer and clip art. (John Rich was the project manager for men; Jones led the women.)

Out of that, the women were the lamest of the lame. And Jones, in an instant, flipped into self-preservation mode. If there's one thing this woman can do -- aside from fretting over printed materials -- she can manipulate to protect herself. By keeping Leakes and Jackson behind to face Trump, she did just that. 

It was risky in that Leakes could be a wild card. Leakes had buddied up to Jackson, surprisingly. It was quite nice to see the two of them warm up like that, actually, and it added a new dimension to the portrayal of both of them on the show. But Leakes had also conceded that she still believed Jackson to be the weakest player on the team. Jones bet that Leakes -- who never fails to keep it real -- would speak up against Jackson as the weakest player. And on that bet, Jones was correct.

That's not to say that Jackson, even with her voice weak from laryngitis, didn't do a good job standing up for herself. The lamb-in-waiting all season came out swiftly and strongly in her own defense, and probably offered a take-down of Jones that many other contestants have tried and failed to accomplish (i.e., poor Lisa Rinna). 

I initially questioned Leakes' judgment on this, though. If she wants to win this show, or at least pave a path toward that, seizing this moment to push Jones out the door could have been the best thing for her to do. Leakes and Marlee Matlin -- who, surprisingly, Leakes accused of kissing up to Jones -- work together like magic and could easily carry the team. They could have dropped Jones, an untrustworthy bully, and managed just fine. 

But I remembered what this game is about -- especially for someone like Leakes. Winning, for some of them, isn't about a prize for charity and bragging rights at the end of the season. It's about getting their name out there and stirring up some buzz. 

Now I see Leakes' strategy: Feuding with Jackson isn't going to get her anywhere. Jackson, I have to admit, is smart enough to know how to portray herself as vulnerable. Feuding with her would make Leakes out to be the beast. And there's no sense in fighting with Matlin, a class act who probably has the greatest cache of goodwill of anyone on the show. And Hope Dworaczyk, despite her contributions, basically serves as a piece of furniture at this point. 

With Jones, she can turn up the volume, go after her like she's Kim Zolciak on a tour bus and won't look like the monster attacking Bambi. She might look like a hero. Heck, she might even land a talk show. (And I would watch it, every day.)

What do you think? Did Star Jones manipulate her way into not going home? Should she have gone home instead? And what do you think of La Toya Jackson finally coming into her own? And are you bracing yourself for the Star vs. NeNe war we've been promised all season?

-- Rick Rojas

Photo: With La Toya Jackson, Marlee Matlin, NeNe Leakes and Hope Dworaczyk in the boardroom, Star Jones defends her turn as project manager after her team fails at making an ad campaign for Donald Trump's hotels. Credit: Douglas Gorenstein / NBC 

'Celebrity Apprentice' recap: Gary Busey tries to go big, but – finally — goes home

On "Celebrity Apprentice" Sunday night, it was clear the men wanted just one thing from Donald Trump: deliverance from Gary Busey.

It makes sense why: The noted actor — and, for some reason, a Trump favorite — was treated like the scourge of his team. He was distracting, he could be offensive, his head seemed to be operating in a different dimension than the rest of his teammates. And by last week, the team that had been handily trouncing the women at the onset of the season was weak and diminished. 

This was Busey's time to go big or go home. Guess which way he went?

RELATED:

Gary Busey video: My team has a conspiracy against me

For the challenge this week, the two teams were tasked with preparing a cooking show for Omaha Steaks and creating a variety package from the Omaha Steaks catalog. This was a creative mission, centered around their ability to market a brand. The women were led by Hope Dworaczyk, who finally had her chance to serve as project manager.

'Celebrity Apprentice' recap: In the boardroom, the weakest links survive

La Toya Jackson said the women were out to get her as she took the helm as project manager on "Celebrity Apprentice" on Sunday night. They ignored her orders. Disrespected her authority. Ostracized her from the very group she was supposed to run. 

Or -- and this is a big "or," so bear with me -- maybe Jackson proved that she was woefully inept as a leader, and, basically, as a normal human being, fumbling with the simple concepts of planning and budgeting. 

Oh well, it didn't matter: It was a poor night for logic and common sense all around, in what culminated in a very confusing and frustrating sit-down in the boardroom. The wrong team won, the wrong person was sent home -- no question.

This week, it was another creative challenge as the two teams had to create interactive marketing booths for Australian Gold, a sunscreen company. Executives from the company were judging the teams on their creativity as well as on how well they represented the Australian Gold brand. 

The men were led by Mark McGrath; the women by Jackson, standing up after being dogged last time in the boardroom. 

The men, as they had in previous creative competitions, took a big risk: They chose a pirate theme, with John Rich rounding up some wenches and a dwarf pirate. It was bold, to be sure, and they all really got into the act, drawing a considerable crowd around them. But, the Australian Gold executives decided, it strayed too much from the brand's usual message, and the koala mascot was nowhere to be found. 

Somehow, the women won. They not only took no risks, their display barely made sense. Jackson showed a complete lack of leadership ability -- or just plain sense. She had no theme, then -- once something was cobbled together -- changed at the last minute. And, my goodness, why on Earth did she ask for 6,000 pounds of sand?

The display ultimately looked like a child's project, without any cohesive theme, and it looked amateurish to boot. But, thankfully, NeNe Leakes -- the one speaking truth to power this week -- wore a koala suit, so they were all good. 

In the boardroom, the Donald's opinions were completely confounding: Why must he be so supportive of Jackson. She proved to be nothing more than furniture in previous tasks, and when the team stepped up to keep this project from being more of a failure than the men's, the Donald continued to effusively praise Jackson and defend her. 

I have to give props to Leakes for speaking up, and for being so hilarious. (Also: Did anyone else notice that Star Jones was on printed-materials duty again? She sure does love her graphic design!)

In any case, the women squeaked by, and I'm willing to bet this whole debate over Jackson has only been postponed a little longer.

It was the men who had to stay behind. The once cohesive and dynamic team is beginning to crumble. It all boils down to Gary Busey, but once again the Donald refused to see that. Busey is the ultimate wild card -- you never know what he'll do or say. He operates in a world all this own, and in a show like this -- and as competitive as this one — that's dangerous. Every day that Busey is still around is a good day for the women's team.

McGrath tried to pull a Niki Taylor in choosing the dignified high road of taking responsibility as project manager. But it didn't quite work. First of all, McGrath has been a sort of grating presence throughout the season. He's a whiner and a complainer; he's always the first to freak out on a task. And he did a respectable job as project manager, but his move -- to me, at least -- didn't come across as noble and as genuine as did Taylor's.

After his teammates said that the problem was indeed Busey, McGrath tried to squirrel out of his previous statements. But Trump wouldn't have it. No matter that Busey has proved to be a burden and lacked any focus -- can you name any contribution from Busey? -- he survived.

Ivanka Trump told her father that she thought he had made the right choice. In a way, she was right. He did make a good choice; if the rubric is who will keep people tuning in to see fireworks and nonsensical statements, Busey is the best choice.

McGrath may have done a decent job and may be a star outside the show, but this is reality TV. When the alternative is a time bomb waiting to explode, working with a team that can't stand his presence, that's always a winner. And next week, he's project manager. 

What do you think, Show Trackers? Do you agree that it's Busey that should have been sent home? Should the women have won the competition? Do you think Jackson was a lousy project manager, or was she right that her teammates were just out to get her? 

-- Rick Rojas

Photo: Lil Jon was assigned to babysit Gary Busey during the project on "Celebrity Apprentice" on Sunday night. Credit: Douglas Gorenstein / NBC 

'Celebrity Apprentice' recap: Marlee Matlin's million-dollar — er, $986,000 — night

I'm glad I'm not friends with any of the cast members on "Celebrity Apprentice."

I would have been broke by week two. No matter how lucrative you may think this Show Tracker blogger gig might be, it certainly doesn't pay enough to satisfy the continuous calls coming out from celebrities vying for Trump's approval as they compete for charity. First, $40,000 pizzas. And now, some sucker paid $470,000 for a bedazzled guitar, only for the team (and charity) he was supporting to lose. 

I have to say, I don't like this kind of episode. I prefer watching the now-fired Dionne Warwick struggling to operate a credit-card machine, or former teen idol David Cassidy sweating in a pizza kitchen. Or, in what seems to be a constant image of the season, Star Jones hunched over a laptop, fretting about the printed materials — the woman cares about her fliers! 

Then comes the telethon. Sure, they raise huge sums of money — this week, the contestants stunningly pulled in more than $1.5 million — which will be passed along to deserving charities. But it becomes an I-have-so-many-rich-friends-a-thon. The means lead to a good end, but it's just kind of disturbing to know that Meat Loaf blowing up at Gary Busey, or John Rich demanding his people bring in money like a callous sales manager somehow contributes to the greater good. 

But that's not what the game's about. It's a game. It's meant to be won. 

The ever-classy Richard Hatch reminded us of that after Jose Canseco departed the show, because, he said, his ill father had taken a turn for the worse. Hatch wondered aloud if Canseco actually left because he couldn't bring enough funds to appease the hard-driving Rich. 

On Sunday, Donald Trump assigned his contestants to make art and decorate hats to raise money for the project manager's charities. Rich, whose charity was St. Jude's Children's Hospital, led the men; Matlin, supporting the Starkey Hearing Foundation, led the women.

Both project managers pushed hard to bring in big bucks, and they brought it in. Rich, who has proved to be one of the most clever of the season, called up his Nashville connections and brought in some impressive donations — with a seemingly constant flow of $50,000 check after $50,000 check. At the end of the night, the men managed to bring in more than a whopping $600,000. And they were clearly confident as they entered the board room. They proffered a pact from Trump that whichever team won would get the other team's earnings too.

But, believe it or not, they didn't bring in enough to trump the women. The women were just $14,000 shy of hitting the million-dollar mark (a gap that Trump closed for them). An impressive sum that La Toya Jackson contributed to by offering a rare T-shirt of her brother's, Michael Jackson, which raised $99,000. (Yet if John Rich's guitar could get nearly half a million dollars, I would think a rare piece of Michael Jackson memorabilia could get more.)

Trump was in an awfully generous mood last night. He made another deal: Considering the unforeseen departure of Jose Canseco, would the women be willing the let the men skip the ax tonight?

Another sign that competition tops charity, the ever-shrewd Matlin made the call that the men should still have to face the chopping block. After the "hell" of the three firings in three weeks, she said, it's only fair that the men have to deal with a loss of their own. 

Trump's generosity continued — he asked the women to stay and help him make a decision (it was a first, he said, but it's not every day a team yanks in nearly a million bucks). Then the players' competitiveness continued too: The women said that Richard Hatch should go. He had brought in, by far, the least of the night. Rich, his project manager, had little sympathy for him too. It doesn't matter that he's a mere reality television star from what is a light year ago in reality TV years, or that he spent more than three years in prison for tax evasion. 

But the men thought the one to go should be Busey, an apparent wild man with a gnat's attention span and who offers mostly platitudes or an acronym for any occasion. (After Meat Loaf apologized after his blow up in the art studio, Busey said that Loaf "excelled to a level of dancing on a rainbow with no fear and no doubt." Beautifully said, whatever it means.) They said he didn't have the focus and lacked the drive that would be essential as the team gets winnowed down. 

Matlin offered a stirring defense of Busey. She said he was smarter than everyone knew, and was mysterious and waiting in the wings to pounce. But a cynic like myself could also see something much more calculated at play. The one who stayed was the wild card who can't be kept in check. The one shown the door was a man who's unscrupulous and knows what it takes to outwit, outlast, outplay.

Richard Hatch ought to know better than anyone what "The Apprentice" is, no matter how much money is raised for good charities. This isn't the Jerry Lewis telethon. This is "Survivor."

***

What do you think? Who had the best art? Would you pay $5,000 for Gary Busey's painting of a buffalo — or for a bottle finger-painted by Lil' Jon? Should it have been Busey going home instead of Richard Hatch, or was it wrong for the women to allow anyone to get the ax? Speak up!

— Rick Rojas

Photo: John Rich and Marlee Matlin sit down with Donald Trump in the boardroom on "Celebrity Apprentice." Credit: Douglas Gorenstein/NBC 

'Celebrity Apprentice' recap: NeNe Leakes, would you be 'my girl' too?

NeNe Leakes stepped forward, and Dionne Warwick got put in her place.

"Celebrity Apprentice" on Sunday night could pretty much be boiled down to that, as the men continued on their merry -- and winning -- way, and infighting continued to plague the women. And it goes without saying, it was a great show. The evening only confirmed my respect and adoration of Leakes and, of course, Marlee Matlin.

The two called each other "my girls." Of all the women on "Celebrity Apprentice" this season, I would have said the two of them may have been the least likely to be kindred spirits. But they share the willingness to work hard in contributing to a team that seems prone to cannibalizing itself.

It was so fantastic to see the NeNe Leakes I know and love from "Real Housewives of Atlanta" finally come into her own, especially this week as project manager. Unlike so many characters of reality television who fit into one box, Leakes really is in a league of her own -- is she the strong-willed villain? Is she the softie who cannot stand up to a legend? Or is this all some kind of act?

She shows herself to be complicated and, ultimately, human and grounded (as much as possible in reality television). The weird thing is, she is a creation of reality TV; she's not a has-been celebrity or a one-time legend in her twilight. This is her celebrity. What endeared her to the "Housewives" audience is that she managed simultanously to be fierce and vulnerable, shrewd and naive. 

She's raw, she's real. 

We saw that as she took the reins as project manager this week. Both teams had to create a commercial advertising a videophone system (anyone heard of Skype?) and then have it judged by sales representatives for the company.

Leakes, leading the women, took the safe route. Their commercial turned out quite well -- it was heartfelt, and Matlin demonstrated that she was an awesome actress by illiciting a visceral reaction within a short clip. 

But the men took a big risk and reaped a big reward when it worked: They went for the funny bone, casting Jose Canseco in eyeliner. (Because of a wardrobe malfunction, we were also blurrily introduced to "Big Wednesday," as Gary Busey calls his "apparatus." But let's go ahead and try to forget that.)

'Celebrity Apprentice' recap: The tale of the class act and the 'hussy'

I must admit, I almost didn't feel like watching "Celebrity Apprentice" on Sunday night. It was rainy, I was tired -- I couldn't take such drama. Or so I thought. The producers knew all I needed was a little NeNe to get into it. 

She's been flying under the radar on "Celebrity Apprentice"  -- and, alas, she continued on that path last night -- but she's what hooked me in. And the fact that she was in an RV only helped: The last time a television audience saw NeNe in such a vehicle, she had joined fellow Atlanta housewives Kim Zolciak and Kandi Burruss on tour and lashed out Kim in another one of their brilliant blowups.

Unfortunately, being stuck in an RV didn't rekindle any anger in NeNe. But it was a heck of an episode, nonetheless, with Gary Busey and Dionne Warwick picking up the slack, to be sure.

But I jumped ahead: Why was there an RV involved in the first place? The assignment this week was for the two teams to market Camping World and their recreation vehicles. Busey was project manager for the men's team; Niki Taylor led the women. 

Busey led the team as one would expect. He muttered; he was disorganized, keeping no tabs on the proceedings. He was perfectly content, offering up acronyms for words that needed no further explanation. ("Team," for example, means in Busey speak: "Together everyone achieving more.")

Mark McGrath just kept flipping out, constantly panicking but doing very little to fix it. Jose Canseco was just a big lug who contributed nothing. 

The saving grace for the men came, once again, from the two strongest, classiest and respectable men on the team: Meat Loaf and John Rich. Rich, especially, worked tirelessly, picking up everyone else's slack and carrying the team with wit and creativity. 

After the mess that last week was for the women -- and even before that, with the pizza parlor -- Team ASAP managed to pull itself together under Taylor. They gussied up the RVs, they got along relatively well; it seemed to go smoothly and without any of the catfights that have, unfortunately, plagued the team thus far. 

But then there's Dionne Warwick.

About (Late) Last Night: Who couldn't love Steve Martin? Alec Baldwin, perhaps [video]

The experience at the Academy Awards a couple of years back must have left Alec Baldwin with a sour taste in his mouth when it comes to his co-host, Steve Martin. The "30 Rock" star, who just so happened to be sitting in the audience of "The Late Show with David Letterman" on Thursday night, stood up to ask Letterman who was on that night. Steve Martin and Selena Gomez, he replied.

Baldwin got up and left, proclaiming that he's not a fan. And he wasn't talking about Gomez.

For the rest of us who stayed behind and watched, though, Martin's interview with Letterman was as funny and as idiosyncratic as would be expected. Martin talked about his use of Twitter and his followers who read all the little tidbits he posts about his life. And he also shared the story of working on a song with Sir Paul McCartney, who thought Martin was simply being modest when he said he was a terrible singer. McCartney heard Martin's singing voice, and realized there was no modesty. He was actually that bad.

— Rick Rojas

About (Late) Last Night: Wanda Sykes and the lightbulbs from back East

Comedian Wanda Sykes talked Las Vegas, Little Orphan Annie and 47th birthdays in a sitdown with Jay Leno on "The Tonight Show." Sykes mentioned that at a recent Las Vegas performance she could tell that the bulk of her audience had come from the cold, snowy East: They all looked like lightbulbs because they had been indoors for far too long. (Oh, how lucky we are to live on the perpetually sunny West Coast!)

She also spoke of the travails of observing a birthday that comes with a certain age. Her wife wanted to whisk her away as a surprise when Sykes turned 47 recently. But at 47, she said, that's not done easily: She needs medication, she needs her neti pot and, of course, more than one pair of underwear.

-- Rick Rojas