'Monday Night Raw' recap: Snooki wins a Slammy, Kane returns
On a special edition of "Monday Night Raw," the Slammy Awards were presented, and a Slammy Award should be given to the audience for having to sit through a three-hour show that seemed to last for nine hours.
The good: Dolph Ziggler beat Cody Rhodes, Daniel Bryan and Zack Ryder. This was about the only good thing on the show. It was a fast-paced match, which Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler unfortunately largely ignored to talk about Twitter. Ziggler won the match, and I really hope the WWE plans on giving him a major push soon.
The bad: The show opened with Jim Ross winning the "Tell Me I Did Not Just See That" Slammy for his dance moves a few weeks ago. It was nice to see good ol' J.R. again, but then Cole decided to interrupt Ross' speech. This led to Booker T (who was presenting the award) telling Cole that Ross could beat him in a rap-off. What followed was an brutal segment featuring Ross and Cole rapping. It absolutely killed the live crowd, who seemed asleep for the rest of the show.
The mystifying: CM Punk, who usually can do no wrong on the microphone, had one of his worst segments ever. The crowd came back to life when he came out, figuring they were going to see and hear something good. Punk proceeded to put the crowd right back to sleep with an absolutely horrible segment designed to make fun of John Laurinaitis. It was a big miscalculation on WWE's part, because I'm guessing 1% of the audience, if that, remembers that Laurinaitis was part of the Dynamic Dudes tag team a couple of decades ago. You could just hear the crowd saying to itself "I can't believe Punk agreed to do this."
By the way, how does Snooki win a Slammy Award over Hugh Jackman?
The show closed with Kane coming out and choke-slamming John Cena. He then revealed to the audience that he was wearing his old mask. It was about the only intriguing segment of the evening.
A suggestion to WWE: If you are going to have a Slammy Awards every year, do it during Summerslam weekend. Summerslam is held at Staples Center every year, and where better to have an awards show than Los Angeles? You can get some stars to present the awards, give out the awards the night before Summerslam, and show highlights of it throughout the next Monday's "Raw." It can be just like the Hall of Fame ceremony at Wrestlemania weekend each year. Make it a big event, make it seem prestigious, and make the awards seem like a big deal rather than the train wreck they have become.
-- Houston Mitchell
Photo: Snooki won a Slammy Award on Monday night. Credit: WWE