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‘True Blood’ recap: Sookie, Snooki, lost memories and one dead fairy

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Wow. Where to even begin?

So, Jason Stackhouse is still tied to that bed frame up in Hotshot, and now, thanks to some certainly illegal Mexican Viagra, that old, stained mattress is the site of -- yes, I’ll just go ahead and call it -- the most unsettling sex scene in the history of the show this side of Bill’s head-turning romp with Lorena last year. Midway through his migration from human to werepanther, Sookie’s brother is called on to begin his child-fathering duties by a desperate Crystal, who’s excited to replenish the ranks of her pack with some outsider blood. But really, did the young ‘uns have to stand in the background and watch the procreatin’ take place? That’s just not anything you want to see.

Better to think about our newly amnesiac Eric Northman, who agrees not to bite Sookie -- or touch her without her permission -- after she offers to help him recover his sense of himself. She takes Eric back to her home (which, of course, he doesn’t recollect having purchased) and invites him in -- admonishing him not to track mud on the rug. She offers to find him something of Jason’s to wear, which, of course, seems silly as there’s no possible way Eric and Jason are the same size, but I digress.

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In any case, Sookie phones Pam to tell her about Eric’s condition, and the vampire arrives at the house terrified for the safety of her maker. Pam is convinced that Bill sent Eric to deal with the witches’ coven, knowing full well that he might not make it out of the encounter alive (or is that undead?). Pam convinces Sookie that she needs to hide Eric for the immediate future, and Sookie reluctantly agrees.

As for the witches who cast that spell, Lafayette believes his best course of action is to go to Fangtasia and beg Eric’s forgiveness, though Jesus and Tara are convinced that doing any such thing is tantamount to suicide. Ignoring their advice, he ducks out of his shift at Merlotte’s and heads to the club, where Pam intends to torture whatever information Lafayette might have out of him. But before long, Tara and Jesus arrive to rescue him, Tara brandishing a gun loaded with wooden bullets as Jesus suggests that the circle might be able to reverse the spell if Lafayette is released unharmed. Pam tells them they have 24 hours to bring Marnie, the leader of the coven, to her or face, well, rather dire consequences.

Marnie, though, seems to have gotten herself in awfully deep with the spirit that takes hold of her when she channels her magic. That spectral brunet who appears near the end of the episode was just one of several images that upped the Season 4 creepy factor -- see preceding passage about the unwashed Hotshot urchins enjoying the live sex show for starters. There’s the decaying doll that bickering lovers Jessica and Hoyt both insist they disposed of but that keeps reappearing in their apartment -- Jessica later gives it to Arlene and Terry as a belated baby gift. Maxine Fortenberry makes for her own unnerving sight, her hair in rollers, insisting that Tommy -- who’s hatching a scheme to rob her blind -- call her Mama. Turns out she’s got a bit of a doll obsession of her own, ordering a Halloween-themed Marie Osmond doll off a home shopping channel just in time for the impending holiday. (Can’t wait to find out how Halloween plays out in Bon Temps.)

And then there’s Debbie Pelt, one year sober, evidently, but still looking like, well, a lanky recovering V addict. Sookie unexpectedly runs into the woman who tried to kill her when she pays Alcide a visit, hoping to persuade him to take ailing Eric off her hands.

It only takes her moments, though, to realize that for better or worse, Eric probably is safest with her -- after all, his cubby in her house does afford him a comfortable place to sleep, and what with his newly thoughtful demeanor and sincere apologies, he’s maybe not such terrible company. Bill definitely seems to be out of the picture, having busied himself with dispensing justice to his vampire subjects, at least the ones unfortunate enough to be caught on tape on www.vamps-kill.com. And he’s also taking Portia Bellefleur up on her ‘professional friends with benefits’ offer. (Wonder if she knows what an out-of-control V addict her brother Andy has become?)

When Claudine unexpectedly shows up to persuade Sookie to come back to the realm of the fae and Eric appears out of nowhere and drains every drop of blood in the fairy’s body, Sookie begins to reconsider that position.

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‘You killed my fairy godmother!’ she shouts from her porch.

‘Sorry ...’ Eric replies, fangs bared but sincere.

Oh, Mr. 1,000-year-old Viking, it’s OK. We forgive you. ... Even if you did call her ‘Snooki.’

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-- Gina McIntyre

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