'Sons of Anarchy': Stephen King is one creepy dude

Until this week's episode, my favorite "Sons" guest star had been Henry Rollins, who, incidentally, DJs the best radio show in L.A. on KCRW. This week's creepy Stephen King cameo, however, rivals Rollins for my props. The king of macabre fiction spends just a few minutes on screen as "Bachman," a cleaner who's been called in to dispose of the Guatemalan caregiver, who was offed in yet another unsavory and unplanned stabbing. But King's few minutes are sticky, both memory- and plot-wise.

Riding up on his red Hog, Bachman looks like a basement dweller who rarely sees the light of day or, for that matter, other living humans. He is pale, thin-lipped, unsmiling. His demeanor is dry to the point of being unpersonable -- exactly what you'd expect for a guy who'll make a body disappear for a scant $1,600.

At first, I wasn't sure what Bachman would be doing when he felt up the dead woman's body and looked in her mouth. Was he a necrophiliac? More likely, he was just checking to see if her rack was real and if she had any fillings that might interfere with his plan to "disappear" her voluptuous, and now rigor-mortised, bod. 

Intrigued by the shopping list he handed Tig and Gemma, I did some research to see what Bachman might have requested to get rid of the body. Several websites pointed to Drano, lye and Coca-Cola as easy-to-get items for dissolving a body into a gel that could be flushed down a drain. Many referenced John George Haig, a.k.a. the acid bath murderer -- a British serial killer who purportedly dissolved five people between 1944 and 1948 using sulfuric acid.

A prolific writer, King surely has lots to do, especially with the upcoming release of his latest, "Full Dark, No Stars." Hopefully he can carve out some time to return to "Sons" for another creepy cleaning.

-- Susan Carpenter

Photo: FX

Comments

[Michael Henry (@TCRPMG)]

I think King's appearance on Sons was genius! For the last two seasons, and so far this season, Sutter has continued to keep me on the edge of my seat in every episode. This show is, by far, the best on TV in my opinion.

For each episode I ponder, "How can he make this even better than the last" and without fail, he does. Sons of Anarchy is one of the most creative, suspenseful shows I have ever watched.

[ExileOnDaytonStreet]

TV Guide thought King was boring and stunt-casted.

I thought his dry portrayal is what made it so funny. He was so strange, yet straightforward, just like the sort of oddball recluse you would imagine being the kind of guy to do this sort of thing.

Another funny part: Tig just seemed to be in awe of him while he was watching him work.

[DT]

I also thought that King was awesome on SOA. The TV Guide guy is crazy...he's a cleaner...is he supposed to act all warm and fuzzy? I would expect a "cleaner" to be somewhat cold and mechanical.

[Severs]

TV Guide obviously watches too many shows like American Idol and Dancing With The Stars... they just don't get it. SOA is the best on TV at the moment and Stephen King's cameo was absolute genius. In fact, I think it's the only time I have seen King in a movie or television show that actually did his writing persona justice.

[Renee]

As a long time King fan, I loved King for writing as Richard "Bachman" in the 90's. What a great idea to continue the use of this name. Brilliant.

[Andy Polder]

"Bachman" also happens to be the pseudonym King has used to author some novels including "Thinner"?

[Joe]

Bacham was Stephen kings pen name but Richard Bacham was another author that Stephen king looked up to and when he passed away Stephen King kept his name going by writing under the name and yes he did write thinner

[Wendy]

I think the irony escaped most that Bachman took the praying hands statue as part of his "payment" when he left, which was, perhaps, the funniest moment of all.

It was also that statue, I believe, that Tara used to clunk the soon-to-be-dead Guatty on the head with earlier.

Gotta love the writers and their sense of style.

[SickOFitALL]

I LOVE that show and loved his performance....hope to see him again....

[bunny69]

OMG! It's Christmas in September! What a treat to see Stephen King appear on my favorite show and as Bachman his alter ego he was simply just this side of genius. TV Guide needs to stop watching TLC reality shows and start watching quality programming to garner back some of that appreciation lost somewhere in the world of reality tv...Love the part where Bachman walked out with the hands in prayer sculpture! I couldn't stop smiling the entire time he was on screen...Thanks Stephen!!!

[Denise]

I knew this guy looked familiar. Bring him back!!!