'Melrose Place': Lie to me

"My life is perfect ... it's better than perfect," lies Amanda Woodward as Michael Mancini diagnoses her with having panic attacks. Amanda, like everyone else in this episode, attempts to spackle the cracks showing in her picture-perfect fantasy life. Yeah, things seem to be going really well for the "Melrose" crew: Lauren and David seem madly in love, Ella and Jonah are at least riding the rebound high, Riley's moving on to other projects, and Nick Zano's there now so the chiseled-abs quotient isn't out of whack since Auggie's departure. But if you look closer ...

-- Amanda's broke -- in it for a lot of cash and may end up taking her firm down with her. Plus, she might have inadvertently opened the door for her boyfriend Ben to be Riley's rebound man. We've seen before that Ben doesn't mind a bit of flirtation with the under 30s. So, what part of her presentation did he like more: her portfolio of information or her, ahem, total package? But hey, Amanda still looks smoking hot in that red dress.

-- Speaking of Riley, I'm still a bit stumped as to why she would seek Amanda's help with anything after the whole fiasco with the modeling campaign. But Riley is clearly a glutton for punishment, as she's willing to hang out with a movie star, Jonah and Jonah's new girlfriend Ella to rehash old times in an attempt to cast Jonah's film. Riley, there's being nice and supportive and there's masochism.

-- And while Ella somehow knew that Auggie and Violet rode off into the sunset together last week, she did not seem to think that this meet-and-greet would blow up in everyone's faces and she would come off looking like, as Riley so eloquently put it, a "vulture in Versace" in front of everyone.

-- Still, things are going pretty well for Ella's roommate Lauren. She and David seem to be getting serious, some secret benefactor paid off her late tuition so she doesn't have to hook anymore, and Michael even seemed appreciative -- nice even -- after she saved one of his patients after her teacher/potential father-in-law screwed up the meds, he being distracted by the whole thing with his wife drowning in the swimming pool and all.

Of course, this niceness thing was all before Michael finds out that David's Noah's real father, thus taking away the one thing Michael still has going for him. As the audience calculates the math on the time frame of all this, David shows off where he gets that super-human force he's becoming so famous for; the two tussle and fall through a strategically placed glass window.

So naturally, Michael's not so forgiving when Lauren shows up at his door for her last prostitution stint and blackmails her into breaking up with David. Who didn't see that one coming?

-- Whitney Friedlander

Full "Melrose Place" coverage

Top photo: Amanda in said smoking hot dress. Bottom photo: Will David and Lauren kiss off next week? Credits: Scott Humbert / The CW

Comments

[OTownBS]

When is this thing going to be canceled?

[Jen]

Last night's episode was the best ever! The dialogue was tight, and it was funny at times and lots of OMG moments, so sad if Melrose is canceled!

@OtownBS , it's one thing to put other people down to make yourself feel better out of your own insecurities and negative outlook on life and everything in it, but to take time to put down a TELEVISION SHOW, especially one you probably never even watched, well...that's just sad.

[Jeff]

My friends and I are starting to love this show! Trashy awesome! Don't f'ing cancel it. Give it one more season and try to grow it.

[starcraft 2 mastery guide review]

Wait! When did Melrose Place get cancelled and why didn't I notice it? Sometimes I feel like living behind the moon. Damn it, just when I started to get used to it...