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'The Bachelor': Return of the rejects... and Rozlyn

February 23, 2010 |  3:01 pm

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Reunion episodes are always a little bit sad and a little bit funny -- with a whole lot of awkward on top. However, I can't remember any "Bachelor" reunion episode quite so dramatic as last night's "Women Tell All" episode.

For months, Chris Harrison has touted Rozlyn's affair with a producer as the "most shocking television scandal of 2010."  However, when it originally came to light, it didn't actually seem all that sordid!  It was still early on in the production, before she'd formed a deep relationship with Jake. Plus, the affair occurred entirely off-camera, which feels a bit anticlimactic for those of us watching from our couches.

In Monday night's special episode, we finally got a taste of what the scandal might have looked like from the inside. However, before we discuss Rozlyn's bizarre segment, let's go over some of the other highlights from the evening.

Before we dived into the dish, we were treated to (or tortured by) a very, very long promo for the upcoming "Bachelor Pad" series. Yes, some of your favorite Bachelors and Bachelorettes -- and some contestants who you don't remember at all -- will be seeking an extension on their 15 minutes of fame.

I was about to start complaining, because it's time to get to the gossip, but then they went and made me feel guilty by showing us how "The Bachelor" gives back. I wouldn't mind if they incorporated their charitable endeavors even more in future seasons -- I would have been much more interested to see Jake and his girlfriends helping out the people of St. Lucia than playing on pirate ships. (Plus, after they give back, they can always head back to those petal-strewn fantasy suites.)

Okay, now the gossip begins.

Michelle: Wow. The montage of crazy they put together for Michelle didn't pull any punches. Still, somehow, miraculously, she doesn't have any regrets. How is that possible? Unfortunately, I don't think anyone believed her.

Elizabeth: I knew she was playing games, but the way her clips were edited made it even more obvious that Elizabeth was working her strategy as hard as she could.  "Do you want to kiss me?" She was far too transparent from day one.

Ali: I haven't been Ali's biggest fan this season, but I was impressed by her segment. She defended her decision to choose work over love by simply saying, "I have bills to pay!" Not to mention, she seemed genuinely regretful for being so hard on Vienna. "Vienna, if you're watching," she said, "I'm sorry." There are plenty of rumors that Ali will be the next Bachelorette, and at this point, I'm on board. While she isn't my favorite, I do think she's the only one of the last handful of contestants with enough personality to carry her own season.

And finally, Rozlyn: The situation with Rozlyn's dismissal from the show has always bothered me a bit.  Though her behavior was certainly shady, it seemed a bit hypocritical to me that Jake was carrying on relationships with handfuls of women but Rozlyn couldn't talk to a producer.

My opinion completely changed after watching her performance in the episode. She played dumb, continuing to insist that she and The Producer (who, apparently, shall remain nameless) had absolutely no physical relationship. Her parade of excuses was almost embarrassing to watch, especially when she tried to use her own son as a get-out-of-jail-free card. In the middle of Rozlyn's convoluted stories, Harrison interrupted, "I have kids, and often times what I tell my son -- when he's going off on an elaborate story about unicorns and magicians, I sit him down and I say, 'Son, isn't the simplest story the truth?" Zing!

Althoug I'd originally thought Harrison's vague language -- calling the affair an "inappropriate relationship" -- was a bit fishy, Monday night it was made very clear that Rozlyn did, indeed, have a physical relationship with The Producer -- who, by the way, has visited her hometown with his family since their dismissal.

Possibly the most disturbing moments in Rozlyn's segment were when she lashed out at everyone in an attempt to deflect the negative attention from herself.  She even stooped so low as to accuse Harrison of hitting on the Nameless Producer's wife.  News flash, Rozlyn: Nobody cares what Chris Harrison does.

Jake's appearance was rather unremarkable, though I did like the chance to see his genuine affection for Ali and Gia one more time. As inevitable as it was, he seemed to truly regret their heartbreak. 

My favorite Jake moments from the "Women Tell All" special were actually in the blooper reel that closed the show. Am I the only one who wishes they'd left some of those hilarious clips in the regular episodes?  Showing Jake as Mr. Perfect all the time does him a disservice. The blooper clips revealed a playful sense of humor that was rarely seen before now.

Do you think I'm being too hard on Rozlyn? Do you believe her story? Who would you like to see as the next Bachelorette? Weigh in on Monday's episode in the comments below and don't forget to check back next week as we discuss that coveted final rose!!

-- Carina MacKenzie (chat with me on Twitter @cadlymack)

Photo credit: ABC

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