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'The Bachelor': Jake enjoys the Fantasy Suites while Ali wallows

118249_D_0668_pre Now that we're down to three women, it's time for the infamous "Bachelor" Fantasy Suite episode.  Jake has invited Vienna, Gia, and Tenley down to beautiful St. Lucia to sweep them off their feet and into his rose-petal laden bed.  There's an certain creep factor to the entire Fantasy Suite practice.  As if it weren't weird enough that Jake is falling for three women at once, the women get their Fantasy Suite key along with a letter from Chris Harrison... because there's nothing more romantic than a reminder that there's a reality show host calling the shots.

Before we get into the dates, we have to check in with Ali, who left Jake last week to return to her job at Facebook in San Francisco.  Couldn't the producers have at least put some effort into making this vignette look realistic? They show Ali lying in bed at a hotel, wearing a hotel-issue bathrobe, staring longingly at some promotional photos of Jake that are arranged on the nightstand.  Please. They could have at least shot the contrived scenes at an actual apartment. I can practically hear the director telling her to try to look regretful and pensive.

Back in St. Lucia, Jake takes advantage of the island flavor on his date with Gia.  It's nice to see them get away from the touristy, luxe comfort of the resort and mix it up with the locals.  Gia's fun side really came out while they drank coconut milk directly from the source and danced to some live music.   Jake mentioned that it was nice to see her more down-to-earth side, since she's usually in thousand-dollar shoes, but after meeting her family last week, he should know that she's not exactly an Upper East Side princess. I'd guess that Gia's actually tougher than he thinks. 

That night, at dinner, Jake and Gia had an intimate conversation in which they kept telling each other how "deep" they are.  Did I miss something? Neither of them revealed anything particularly profound on that conversation.  As the night wound down, Jake (er... or Chris) invited Gia to the Fantasy Suite, where they get cozy in the bathtub before shooing the cameras out of the room.

For the next date, Jake took Tenley on a rain forest hike with a picnic lunch.  Watching Tenley and Jake flirt is almost painfully boring. She's sweet, but her Paris Hilton baby voice is grating, and her wide-eyed innocence grows tiresome quickly.  They remind me of the quarterback and the head cheerleader in the most trite high school story ever told. Even when they're making out, there doesn't seem to be much sexual chemistry.

Additionally, it rubs me the wrong way when Tenley tells Jake, "Thank you for giving me this opportunity, even with my past." Her husband cheated on her; he's the one with the sordid past, not Tenley.  She acts as though, because she's already been married and wronged, she's somehow tainted goods. I think Tenley needs to develop her own self-confidence before she throws herself into a serious relationship.

It was sweet of Jake to work some after-dinner dancing into the date, because he knows Tenley is passionate about dance.  Unfortunately, the romance of the moment was ruined because she couldn't stop giggling and chattering like an adolescent on her first date.  I have to admit, I was surprised when Tenley accepted the invitation to the Fantasy Suite. Of course, she didn't do it without reminding Jake of how weighty the decision was, considering that he'd only be the second man to spend the night with her.

Finally, Jake took Vienna out on her date.  I know that the general consensus among Showtracker readers is that Vienna is a bad choice, but I really like watching her time with Jake.  He seems more engaged and enamored by her.  With the other women he occasionally sounds like he's reading off a script, or saying exactly what he thinks they need to hear, but with Vienna, Jake always seems genuine.  They're both energetic and flirtatious on this pirate ship date, and Jake seems more like a person and less like a Ken Doll.

That night, Jake does something he hasn't done with any of the other women: he asks Vienna to describe her dream engagement ring.  She wants a thin platinum band, with a princess cut diamond, and maybe some excess "bling," too. When she asks Jake if he can see himself marrying her, he says "Yes," very confidently. It's not until later that he reminds her that he's also falling for two other women - it makes me wonder if the producers slipped him a note to dial back a bit. After all, they wouldn't want to ruin the surprise.

Back in the fantasy suite, Jake and Vienna barely glanced at their dessert before she slipped into something more comfortable and the cameras got the boot.  "She makes my heart glow," Jake says. Aww.

Up to that point, the episode had been devoid of drama... and who better to crank up the theatrics than Ali?  She calls Jake while sitting in a corner on the floor, and at first, she doesn't even speak, she just makes sad noises in her throat and pouts.  After watching his dates with Gia, Tenley and Vienna, I wasn't surprised at all when he told Ali not to come to St. Lucia.  She sure did give it her best shot, though--she offered to fly out just long enough for him to see her, and then he could send her home. Still, Jake wasn't willing to sacrifice one of the other girls in order to have Ali back. I wouldn't be surprised if Ali returns as next season's Bachelorette.

I have to say, I wasn't expecting him to send Gia home at the rose ceremony; I thought the plane ticket had Tenley's name on it.  Gia took it very well, though, and for the first time this season, I genuinely felt sorry for the eliminated bachelorette.  At least now she can take the ugly necklace he gave her off of her wrist.

Take it to the comments, Showtrackers!  Were you surprised by Jake's decision? Did you think Ali deserved another shot? Let me know below, and don't forget to check back in next week to discuss the Reunion Special!

--Carina MacKenzie (follow me on Twitter @cadlymack)

Photo Credit : ABC


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Comments () | Archives (14)

Another good recap! No,I was certain Gia was going home,she is tooo much for Jake to handle.Too pretty,too flashy,too insecure,much to high maintenence.As for the mouse,she should be the choice,but he will choose the red convertable,Vienna.As for Ali,she obviously made the right choice to go home.

I will wait to read the article until AFTER I post my comment.

Got to hand it to ABC for editing the highlights in and out to create drama...they ARE the kings of that trick. The show was great, I really enjoyed it but the Ali-Bye segment - once again - dragged on to the point of GRUELING. My gawd, it went on for at least 20 minutes! Did SHE stage that whole scenario, really? Or, was it ABC's idea - and did they simply see an opportunity and decide to milk it? Pretty CHEESY ABC.
I almost thought Jake was falling for her BS, but I gotta hand it to him for rationally weighing out his options and making - what I think is a sound decision. If Ali was gambling - she needs to stay out of Vegas.
SEE YA!

I was saddened to see Gia heartbroken, but it was better to cut her early, then wait until the very end. That was the gentlemanly thing to do - kudos to Jake. I think he has already chosen Tenley - who was my choice from the very beginning. I believe Vienna will better handle the disappointment than Gia, when the final rose is handed out to Tenley. I think there may be wedding bells as a result of this bachelor. I'm thrilled for them!

I wasn't certain if Tenley would spend the night with Jake, but I assumed Gia would and had NO doubt Vienna would - were they even in the suite long enough to pour a drink before putting on her lingerie - why both with that???

I wonder if Ali or Gia will be the next bachelorette? Hmm, maybe ABC was testing the waters with this whole Ali-bye drama-rama???

It went down exactly as I thought it would. Jake sent Gia home with much regret - I think they just weren't as connected as the others. Ali's big play to get back in was nauseating. I wonder if she thought it would work like Ed and Jillian, and she would end up with the guy in the end, drawing all that attention to herself, with her "mistake" making her stand out to Jake in some special way. In this case, it really backfired. Jake seems to have a lot of common sense up to this point, and has even sent one girl home for playing games which was really sharp of him. The one thing I'm not sure of with him is how deep or mature he is. Tenley seems ready for marriage and kids. Vienna seems ready to play. I think Jake may make his final decision on what he wants right now, and not on the future. I do hate the fantasy suite business - trying the girls out sexually to see who suits him the best. It's a totally unrealistic scenario as well. Sex, love, and marriage are all art forms and skills that grow and improve with life as you live with and come to know and fully appreciate and respect your partner. I say this as someone who has been married for 36 years. I hope your parents can help you make this difficult decision, Jake. I sure hope Ali doesn't come back as the Bachelorette. I didn't like her at all, and thought she came on sweet to Jake when she really wasn't there for him, but was there for herself, as her decision to leave ultimately showed. Any of the other three remaining girls would be a much better choice.

Jake, Mr. Amazing, amazing, amazing, amazing, amazing, gimme another word, ugh, amazing...

He's fallen in love with three women? At once?
Sounds like bigamy, to me. Keep them all around. Raise the red lantern while you're at it.

This program is demeaning. Where else would women allow a guy to flit around, spend the night with others, profess to love them, promise to marry one, and have a hard time making up his mind?

And these 'dates'. Jake didn't set them up, or pay for them, and certainly didn't deocrate them. Rose petals? Puhleeeese.

Ali's phone call = total fakery. Look closely. Jake changed clothese real fast between the time the phone rang, and he answered it. Fire that director.

Mike Fleiss is the devil.
Chris Harrison is the devil's assistant.
Everyone else on this show is a massochist.
And those of us who watch it are all suckers.

It's Fairlyland. Just wait until this cast of 'reality show' characters leaves their 16x9 coocoon, and return to the world in which the rest of us live.

Oh my god, this show is still on? I thought it was cancelled years ago!

Why would anyone watch a show that they have no respect for and considers it's producer and host to be devils, and then put themselves and everyone else down, who tunes in to it?

That is the stupidest thing I've ever read, Wayno - I mean Weirdo.
Do you think you're cute and funny with that comment?
No. It's just sad. Stop hating.

Wow, another scripted night with Ali. I am so glad he didn't invite her back.

But what a cheesy included extra. Boring as the show might be without the drama, it would be far better, more believable and realistic.

So he took Gia on the first date and literally fawned over her. He really poured it on- so I was a bit surprised that she got the boot. However I got a bit tired of watching her little girl faces, her pouty upward/downward glances- her lack of confidence. Maybe he didn't care for that either. A helpless waif isn't wife material.

I don't know how she was in the sack, but deep down Jake must've known he couldn't be a match for her family. He's red, white and blue, apple pie and baseball. They're a spinoff from almost any Italian/Mafia drama show/movie.

So goodbye Gia.

Then on to Tenley- their date together wasn't nearly as expansive as his date with Gia. Jake didn't really pander on about their compatibility as much as he did with Gia either. At that point I thought Tenley was the goner. Surprise!
I am a little shocked that Tenley did accompany Jake to the Fantasy Suite. I'll bet that was a ride she won't forget! I wonder if she played the victim while they were in bed?

She is as bland as he is, so a safe pick for him.

Now on to Vienna. I always think of the little sausages when I hear that name.
Even though she is horse faced and cross eyed, she seems to have Jake all sewn up. He seems to be in awe of her on their date. No cutesy eye play and no putting herself down, Vienna is all encompassing and very sure of her place in his life. Even though she isn't the great beauty she seems to have captured his heart. She was the only one that he discussed engagement rings with. There was a BIG clue right there. Maybe she passed the overnight exam.

As one other poster said, it is a bit presumptuous and downright crappy that Jake gets to play stud service. And he even has the mitigated gall to speak about morals to one of the girls. Tenley I think?

So now these girls are competing with the prowess of their bodies. Even though sex is a natural part of a relationship, the problem is, he doesn't really have a 'relationship' established with any of these young ladies. So it seemed pretty unreal that the expectation would be to sleep with all of them. I wonder what each girl thought? Too bad they didn't have them on camera sneering at each other discussing it.

I did feel bad for Gia- to be used like that and then tossed aside. I hope the network examines that policy of having sex included in the mix. Seems pretty shallow and unfair that they kicked Rozlyn off for having an affair, yet a few weeks down the road, they've got Jake servicing the last three contestants.

That just left a bad taste in my mouth.

ABC: take note. Not everyone thinks the sex added big fireworks. It added big disappointment.

Interesting comments, for sure. Well, with the exception of those who claim to loathe it. Wow.

What I don't get is; why is everyone making such a big deal of the sex dates? And why does anyone find it creepy? There's no rule that says the girls must give it up...they do it willingly. Cliche as it may be, it takes 2 to tango.

Now, Michelle...she's CREEPY.

Yea...poor, misunderstood Rozlyn. Please, what a gold digging skank. I can't wait for the 'women tell all' episode - so she can make an even BIGGER fool out of herself - as she continues with damage control. She wanted to be famous and now she is. Hahaha, priceless! Not so pretty now, is she???

Everyone's take on the Vienna/Jake thing is so different than my own. The way I see it is...he's taking her along for the ride. I think he sees sausage girl as an easy 'dumpee', and I don't entirely believe she's not in on the scam. The engagement ring conversation was fake to me...I don't think he has any intention on proposing to her. When does ABC ever reveal that much about the chosen one??? Not buying it.

I'm surprised that I haven't seen anyone mention that Jake pushed Vienna twice on their date, while she was walking onto the boat then off the plank. Combined with his comment about being rough, I saw this as a red flag. He's always dripped with insincerity, and the fact that he acts most natural around Vienna shows that only with an ugly girl can he feel confident enough to be the jerk he really is. They deserve each other, Gia can find someone worth her time. I think Ali left because she didn't want to be around Jake anymore, and they made her make the call to get more air time out of it.

My $.02?

I have thought from the outset that Vienna was just a shallow, empty person, but the longer the show has progressed, the more two things have become clear:

1) Jake is an idiot. He is a sweet idiot, but an idiot nonetheless. When he looked at Gia and told her she was "deep", he was either an incredibly poor judge of character or he was working overtime to get into her pants. Gia is likewise sweet, but she just didn't have much going on, aside from whining about past relationships, which brings me to Point #2--

2) Jake will easily choose Vienna. Almost as predictable as Jake using the word "amazing" to describe anything--it wouldn't surprise me if it turned out frat boys had made a drinking game out of taking shots every time Jake said "amazing"--was the rate at which Gia and Tenley complained about their past relationships. The more it happened, the brighter and bigger the red flag to any sentient being--neither of these women is ready for a relationship.

Vienna, on the other hand, may be a skank but she has no pretensions. She has put past relationships in the vanishing point of her rear-view mirror and is interested only in what she can scam from the future. Jake will choose her since, in this specific example, she will show herself to be very low-maintenance; she won't be comparing Jake to some guy who broke her heart in the past (mostly because it seems Vienna has done all the heartbreaking).

Keep in mind that the show wrapped taping about four months ago. Whether Jake and Vienna are still interested in being together is anybody's guess. Theirs is truly a Love to Last a Lunchtime, but it will be easier to navigate for Jake than the stormy pasts of Gia and Tenley.

Oh--and Ali will be the next Bachelorette. Book it.

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ali cannot be the next Bachelorette! It's like nails on a chalkboard when she talks!!! She is super whiny while playing the role of a focused career-driven woman. Hopefully she got that promotion she was gunning for at Facebook because there is no WAY ABC will have someone so obviously manipulative and completely annoying to watch as the next Bachelotette.

I agree with hilly-d, Ali is a whiner, but think about it. Next in line for The Bachelorette would be Gia. I like Gia, but 'deep' is not how I would describe her. Obviously Jake was at a loss for words. She's just a simply gal who happens to be gorgeous, relying too much on her looks to make it in life. I grew tired of the pouty faced and watching her play with her lips. Some things are better kept private, or in a porn film. Then there's her family. Not impressed. Did mom REALLY break out the Tarot cards? Yikes. What was she thinking? That reminded me of the dead bird ceremony.

Ali might be the best choice, assuming her job can get a temp replacement to cover for her. Damn. But yes, she made a fool of herself and I became increasingly annoyed. I saw her ugly side brewing early on with her obsession with Vienna. She definitely is multifaceted. Kind of like...Sybil.

My observation, outcome prediction..... Jake will choose neither of these girls. Ali will be back in his life. Did you not see the shallowness and distance she played from what happened between them tonight. That's my prediction.... something I heard earlier, Tenley, an issue with Jake being uncertain about there physical compatability, Vienna crying her eyes out and the question of course about what kind of ring would you like.... it doesn't happen, that was a "let us make them think it's her" drop.... so, Vienna and Tenley are out, Ali is back. Vienna is the next bachelorette.

Where's the re-cap for The Women Tell All??? Every other lame show is listed.

Wow…Rozlyn out did herself last night. What a piece of work she is. As experienced in deceit as she may be, in this situation she is only fooling herself. She’s not as skilled at lying as she thinks and obviously must be accustomed to dealing with amateurs. Her pathetic attempt to drop a bomb on Chris was low – even for her. What a scandalous, treacherous tramp. I fear for any man who falls for her. It’s scary to think she is a mother.

Michelle is delusional – poor thing.

Sadly – because of the unjustifiable attacks Vienna received from the girls in the house – she was protected last night from further verbal strikes. Bummer – thanks girls. I SO wanted SOMEBODY to bring up her father. He creeped me out by the way he looked at his daughter, rubbed her back and leered at her and Jake when they were kissing. Eww.

Yes, the previews of next week are somewhat disturbing, but I'm sticking with my original prediction. Interesting what Amy has to say though.

Ali admitted outright that she gambled...not cool. Huge risk to take by expecting him to chase her down. That's exactly the type of marriage they would have - full of games - and she have him following her around like a puppy dog.
I still Think Tenley is his best match.


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