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'Real Housewives of Orange County': Mad men

December 18, 2009 |  9:34 am

Real-housewives-oc_l What was supposed to be an all-girls weekend full of Wa-hoos! and martinis turned into a couples retreat. 

It seemed to start as planned. Gretchen, a heavily medicated Lynne, and Tamra met Vicki at the Florida hotel, ready to sip on some cocktails and unwind. Oh, but wait … there was Simon. Oh, and wait. Here comes Slade! A visibly irritated Vicki, who had organized the trip as a female bonding excursion, could do nothing but roll her eyes as she watched the men invade her trip. And can you blame her? Hello, it was always planned as an all-girls vacation! I get the whole we-never-spend-time-apart. It seems cute and romantic, at first. But, really, it’s just sad. Whatever happened to “absence makes the heart grow fonder”?

But the dudes did keep at bay, at times.

The gals took a helicopter ride to the Everglades and, with the help of Bubba (who Vicki was eyeing for her daughter, of course), a tour through an animal reservation. There were plenty of annoying shrieks (mainly from Gretchen) and laughter. And, for the millionth time, Gretchen and Tamra reminded us about their feud and how they’re willing to bury the hatchet in social situations. OK. OK. We get it. 

Alexis and Jim eventually arrive in Florida, adding fuel to the fire. The gals go out for dinner but feeling like a third wheel, Vicki decided not to join the ladies and their men for drinks afterward. And so the Vicki bashing began.  Simon, his ego firmly in place, insists Vicki is jealous of his and Tamra’s relationship. Riiiight. And Jim thinks her problem is that she doesn’t like not being in control. Um, talk about being delusional.

The female-bonding trip continued its tailspin when the men tagged along for the sunset cruise. Vicki, upset by their presence, again decided to stay back -- leaving Lynne with the uncomfortable task of toughing it out with three couples. But those meds helped her out and it wasn’t long before she was talking to her imaginary husband.

Meanwhile, Simon and Tamra (is it me or did it look like they were re-creating a scene from Titanic by standing at the head of the boat?) discussed Vicki. Tamra feels guilty Vicki is sad. Simon doesn't really care.

And from the looks of previews for next week’s episode, things between Simon and Tamra aren’t quite as dandy as he would have you believe.

So Show Trackers, what are your thoughts on the men crashing the trip? An attempt to get their own spin-off, possibly? Who do you side with, Vicki or the men?

-- Yvonne Villarreal

Photo: Lynne, Alexis, Vicki, Gretchen and Tamra. Credit: Bravo