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‘Glee’: A hairlicious distraction before Thanksgiving

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Distractions, distractions, distractions.

That was the theme of the latest “Glee.” But there is one distraction that I haven’t mastered. What exactly am I going to do when Fox puts the surefire hit on hiatus after the initial 13-episode run ends Dec. 9 (that’s two weeks for those not near a calendar)?

April 13 is far away from here, and Fox -- if you’re listening -- I don’t want to see any more preggers drama. You have two weeks to wrap up this folie à plusieurs (English translation: madness of many).
My dislike of the pregnancy plot line distracted me from what mattered about last night’s episode: good music!

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Six minutes into the episode, we were treated to a rousing edition of “Bootylicious,” and as a die-hard Beyoncé fan, I was in my living room shaking my derrière in my “Simpsons” PJs. Complete heaven.

I was looking forward to tonight’s episode as a fan of Eve’s acting (and her music isn’t so bad either). I’ve always been thoroughly impressed by her on-screen charm, and she worked nicely, leading a team of bad girls who attempt to rob banks, steal wallets and know how to fling a good head of hair. Was I the only one in hysterics over Brittany’s lesson in hairography? ‘Pretend like you’re getting Tasered. ...Like cool epilepsy.’

As much fun as all that was, the Debbie Downer that is Quinn still remained. I cringe when she appears on screen, but she did at least try to expand the moral fiber in her little conscience and spend some time testing out Puck’s father and boyfriend potential. Plus, I got a not-so-painful acoustic version of “Papa Don’t Preach” that, dare I say, was decent enough to make me forget about the whole pregnancy storyline.
I like to pretend that Terri doesn’t exist (sorry if there are any Terri fans out there, but I seriously doubt it), but I can’t ignore her methods of “distraction.” One is the pillow divider. Gosh, Mrs. Shue, really? I hate that Will is so oblivious to all this. She even went as far as buying him a classic car to distract him from the absent baby bump and the fact that he’s in a sexless marriage. So much work she’s putting into this sham, wouldn’t it just be easier to say you suffered a hysterical pregnancy and then break out into song and dance in the hospital?

With all this distracting going on, I got distracted by Racheal and her “Pretty Woman” moment, with the aid of a scheming Kurt. The sultry makeover was going so well until you went all sad clown hooker on Finn in your bedroom. That hair was (and sadly is again) Mariah Carey circa the “Vision of Love” era. Do not want! Go back to the Racheal that “somehow manages to dress like a grandmother and a toddler at the same time.’ Racheal, you’re almost there with Finn. Is it wrong that I want her to spill the beans to Finn? Preferably next week.

And on a side note, can we get Kurt a more suitable love interest? Come on, it’s Ohio, there’s another gay boy lurking at William McKinley High hoping to run his pretty fingers through Kurt’s perfectly coiffed hair. Wait, its Lima – yeah Kurt might want to forget it.

If it weren’t for Sue’s crazy antics, we wouldn’t have been treated to these excellent selections. Had she not leaked info to the rivals, Will wouldn’t have tried so hard to top it. So thank you Sue. Watching Mercedes lend her vocals to the School for the Deaf’s interpretation of “Imagine” was incredible, and the kids turned “True Colors” into a poignant number -- those were my feel-good, tearjerker moments.

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But what better way to capitalize on hairography than a mash-up of “Crazy in Love,” hands down thee best Beyoncé song, with a little bit of “Hair” the musical, no matter how crazy they looked.

Though there isn’t much time left, we do have two weeks to be gleeful!
-- Gerrick D. Kennedy (Follow me on Twitter @GerrickKennedy)

Photos, from top: Eve guests stars. Members of the Jane Adams Academy get ‘Bootylicious.’ Credit: Fox

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