‘The Amazing Race’: Lions, zebras and gazelles, oh my

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I always know it’s a fantastic episode of ‘The Amazing Race’ when I’m not only screaming at the television but also rolling on the floor laughing uncontrollably.

This week’s installment was no exception, offering a hilarity-stuffed detour through the streets of Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam, a seriously surreal golden-dragon water-puppet show, some major errors in judgment by several teams -- and Lance and Keri.

Yes, the main reason this episode was so enjoyable was because of this hyper-aggressive and frequently bickering duo. Although other teams made some rather large blunders (‘sexually pure’ Mika and Canaan, I am looking right at you for DANCING at the dragon puppets rather than, you know, grabbing the clue), the mantle of stupidity was placed firmly on the shoulders of Lance and Keri.

There was no task too small, no moment too simple that this team couldn’t screw it up somehow, all while screaming bloody murder at one another. Though every other team had no problem figuring out that there was a clue contained in a bullet that they received, Lance and Keri nearly caused an international incident when they attempted to ... trade? Barter? Intimidate? I’m still not sure what they were trying to do with that bullet, other than open it and take out the stamp concealed within.

And they kept causing absolute chaos wherever they went, even when they knew what city they were in. At the detour this week, the not-so-dynamic duo let go of one of their balloons, got lost, wound up in some sort of enclosed gazebo and then nearly knocked over that poor balloon woman (and did in fact take out her chair and most of her belongings) when they attempted to complete the task. All while screaming at the top of their lungs and blaming each other for their misfortunes.

Given the emphasis placed on them by the editors this week, I thought for sure that they would be done for, even after Lance (‘the lion’ as he calls himself) pulled his best ‘Hulk smash’ impression and hammered those spare VCRs, ripping them apart with his bare hands like a madman. He even threatened to wrestle Phil to the ground on the pit stop, a first on ‘The Amazing Race.’ But this steroidal couple isn’t out of the race just yet as Marcy and Ron wound up coming in last place.

Still, it must have been a blow to the pugnacious ‘lion’ that the ‘zebras and gazelles’ managed to get to the pit stop way ahead of him. Do we think it’s sincerity that compels Lance to say that said zebras and gazelles will soon tire ... or just misguided arrogance?

However, I was extremely happy to see Flight Time and Big Easy land in first place and walk off with a trip to Aruba, especially given that Big Easy’s father passed away just two days before the race began. If you ask me, the fact that he’s able to run, much less sprint, to the pit stop is the true sign of a lion heart. Deal with that, Lance.

What did you think of this week’s episode? Were you sad to see Marcy and Ron go? Should Lance and Keri have been sent packing for their bad attitudes and sheer incompetence? Sound off in the comments below!

-- Jace Lacob

Follow my musings on television, food and more television on Twitter at @televisionary.