'Glee': Ah, fellas!

Time for a pop quiz, Gleeks: What did we learn from last night’s episode?

A)  Cheerios coach Sue Sylvester will stop at nothing in her mission to obliterate the glee club because, by golly, she needs a fog machine.

B)  No matter whose dad he’s playing -- whether it’s Sydney Bristow’s or Will Schuester’s -- Victor Garber is The Man.

C)  It’s, like, really, really rough out there for a “Glee” guy.

You get an A if you answered "D) All of the above," though thematically, the episode spent quite a bit of time driving home C. The “Glee” guys sure were struggling in the confidence department last night, weren’t they? It started with teacher Will, who, still believing there’s a bun in wife Terri’s oven, confided to his dad over a glass of vino that he was terrified of impending fatherhood. Garber quickly blamed himself for his son’s lack of self-assurance, since boys learn that from their pops, and he’d hardly set a good example by shelving his law school dreams for an unfulfilling career in insurance. “Being a man is all about one thing: guts,” Papa Schuester said. “And you have about six months to figure out if you have any.” Cheers, son!

Glee club rehearsal didn’t help matters. More after the jump ...

In front of the whole gang, Rachel dissed Mr. Schue’s elementary choreography, just as those trouble-stirring Cheerios had encouraged her to do. How would they possibly be able to compete with Vocal Adrenaline, the powerhouse rival show choir first seen in the pilot? If they were gonna take regionals, they needed Vocal Adrenaline’s choreographer, Dakota Stanley, a man who had once been the understudy to the Candelabra in "Beauty and the Beast" on Broadway. With a credential like that, how could he not be the best? When Will pointed out that “understudy” didn’t necessarily mean the guy had performance experience, it was Cheerio Quinn who naturally gave the knife another twist. Had Mr. Schue ever performed post-high school? Had he even tried?

But it was lovesick colleague Emma, working overtime to pretend she wasn’t lovesick over Will, who finally pushed him over the edge. He’d harbored dreams of a showbiz career, he confessed to her, but never had the guts to actually go for it. The OCD-riddled guidance counselor made a point, in between scrubbing clean her plant leaves, of telling him that her new boyfriend, football coach Ken, might be flawed “but he knows who he is. There really is nothing sexier in a man than confidence.”

After some impromptu harmonizing in the teachers’ lounge -- an effort to cheer up the shop teacher, who accidentally sliced off both thumbs in a cough-syrup-induced haze -- Will decided that forming a hip-hop boy band was just the thing to help him get his mojo back. The scene in which the group debated a name -- Acafellas ultimately trumped Crescendudes and Testostertones -- was hilarious. As was Will dismissing the disgraced previous glee club sponsor with, “Sandy, we voted. When you’re in the group, it’s creepy.” Acafellas’ first performance at Benchwarmers Sports Bar was a roaring success: They sold all 17 copies of their debut CD, “and I didn’t have to show any of [the buyers] my bosom,” said a proud, and drunk, Mama Schuester. On top of it all, a thrilled Will was getting increased action -- once a week! -- from his wife. Too bad it had less to do with his newfound confidence than her daytime-soap-style ruse to get pregnant before he realizes the truth.

Ah, Terri: I agree with several of you who posted comments last week that the wifey is beyond annoying, though clearly she’s supposed to be. I wondered too how she and Will, seemingly so mismatched, wound up together until I re-watched the pilot and noted Will’s line to Emma that he felt Terri had changed over the course of their marriage. Not much to go on, granted, but I have confidence that creator Ryan Murphy will flesh out Jessalyn Gilsig’s character over time. Her seemingly sincere apology to Will for not being more supportive of his boy band was a nice first step.

As for Will, though the guy may have had his motivations -- hats off to him for wanting to set a go-after-what-you-want-in-life example for his nonexistent kid -- didn’t it feel as though his commitment to the glee club melted away rather quickly? He’s spent all this time alternately fighting the principal, Sue Sylvester, Terri and an often sneering student body to give the club a real shot at renewed greatness. How could he turn his back so easily?

Especially when two of its male members were going through crises of their own? Finn’s resolve was fading, because of continued cracks from his football teammates. “It’s hard being the quarterback when I get in the huddle and all the guys are calling me ‘Deep Throat,’” he said. It didn’t help that he got called out by Rachel in a strong hallway scene. “I have enough confidence to say out loud that what happened between us in the auditorium was real,” she told him, referring to last week’s make-out session. “You have feelings for me, but you just don’t have the guts to admit it.”

And then there was poor Kurt, who seemed surprised to discover that fellow singer Mercedes didn’t realize he was gay but then couldn’t summon the strength to tell her during the glee club carwash fundraiser. (Getting the Candelabra’s understudy to be your merciless choreographer doesn’t come cheap, people!) Eventually, Kurt did find the words in a lovely, tearful scene near episode’s end, but only after Mercedes busted up the windshield of his prized SUV and broke into a musical number as fiery as her red fringey jacket. Over the top? Yep. But “Glee” is a musical. And the emotion behind the whole thing felt appropriately real. Look no further than Mercedes’ heartbreaking what-if-I-can’t-do-better speech? “I’m tired of being lonely, aren’t you?” she said to Rachel and Tina during their “gay-vention.” “He’s in our group; he understands what I’m going through. Maybe that’s not enough for you guys, but it’s enough for me.”

As for the show’s final musical number -- Acafellas’ PTA-meeting performance of Color Me Badd’s “I Wanna Sex You Up” -- I’m guessing some parents concerned about the show’s sexual content weren’t thrilled. (Or have you already stopped watching?) I’m guessing several other peeps out there think Matthew Morrison’s hotness hit a whole ‘nother level with that tie-undone number. No doubt there will be many more songs in his future, even though the boy band disbanded, leaving a wiser Will conveniently free to return his attentions to glee club.

The cause of the lineup-changing group’s breakup is worth mentioning, of course, thanks to Josh Groban’s laugh-out-loud appearance. Confronting his stalker Sandy with a restraining order, Groban implored, “Stop sending me nude photos ... edible gift baskets, locks of hair. I don’t want to read any more of the sonnets you wrote for me!”

Poor Josh Groban. Make that poor dirty dog Josh Groban, considering how, soon after, the singer was hitting on Will’s mom. Groban, we learned, likes a good middle-aged alcoholic almost as much as he likes talking about himself in the third person. The question is, do we think Mama Schuester went on to hook up with Groban?

Sound off below!

But first, two nominees for bon mot of the night:

“Artie, you’re cut. You’re not trying hard enough -- at walking.” -- Dakota Stanley, addressing the club’s wheelchair-using student

“I’m going to ask you to smell your armpits. That’s the smell of failure, and it’s stinking up my office.” -- Sue Sylvester to her Cheerios spies

-- Shawna Malcom

Photo credit: Fox

Comments

[MLA17]

Thanks for the great recap! I was so happy to see Victor Garber as Will's dad. Love him!! Another great episode; looking forward to next week's.

“I’m going to ask you to smell your armpits. That’s the smell of failure, and it’s stinking up my office.” -- Sue Sylvester (Great line)

[Thanos]

I LOVE GLEE !

[Chris]

I loved last nights episode! I would, however, LOVE to see more of Jane Lynch!! Her comic timing is PERFECT!!! I'm definitely a GLEEK!

[can'twaitforKChen]

I think Terri's going to take shape pretty soon - after all, she has to reveal she isn't preggers pretty quickly. My personal favorite line of the night was a toss up between "They say it takes more certainty than talent to be a star - look at John Stamos" (Emma has the best understated lines!) and "What's wrong with me is that you're freakishly tall! I feel like a woodland creature!"

[Andrea]

I ADORED last nights episode and, being a girl who totally took on her choir teacher when a Christmas song he chose totally sucked, only to have it blow up in her face when he dramatically threw all the music away(!), I can attest to how easy it is for a male teacher in a predominately female field to give up, no matter how hard they originally had to fight. That part of the plot made it completely realistic, especially as Matt Morrison LOOKS like my old high school choir teacher (except my teacher was screamingly gay; and high school was 10 years ago). He even dances like him. I can't wait for next week!

[Jordan F]

This was a really great recap!! I agree with the PTA comment.. the song seemed a bit over the top for a PTA meeting haha.. but you know, even with Glee's moments I think it has surpressed a ton of potential cheesy moments.

Yeah, Terri is suppose to be annoying.. but I don't really know her and Will's background story yet, so I can't judge, she's just overdramatic at time (but it's a show so...). And I guess I just really want Will & Emma to be together..

O.M.G The Mercedes and Kurt moments were soooooo great & sooooo cute! I mean you pretty much know Kurt is gay from the beginning (and extra fabulous b/c of it!) but this episode kinda made me wish he wasn't just so they could be together! But at least they're good friends now :) But I really hope they get some good relationship stuff going for the both of them b/c they become even more increasingly likable in this one (with Mercedes' shyer more modest side & her speech in response to the "gay-vention".. AND Kurt's touching first coming out to Mercedes (so beautiful! LOVE Chris!))

Of course looking forward to all the other [potential] relationships (Racheal & Finn... Tina & Artie?? LOVE him btw) And all the great upcoming numbers!! SO PUMPED FOR SOMEBODY TO LOVE!!!

Ok... really long post... but hey, I really love this show :)

[Blair]

OMG Josh Groban is fantastic! I was totally surprised to see him in the episode, I hadn't heard he was going to be in it. It was so funny when he hit on Will's mother. I am surprised that Finn's friend with the mohawk didn't beat Josh to her. LOVE LOVE LOVE Josh Groban!

[kerry]

BEST. EPISODE. EVER. Too...much...hilarity and...awesomeness. From Henri the Thumbless trying to eat his thumbs-up cake sans fork (since he couldn't hold one being sans thumbs 'n' all), to Finn the Frankenteen getting dressed down for making Dakota feel like a woodland creature, to the look on Sue's face when Puck humped it out in her direction, to the now-I-don't-actually-hate-Josh-Groban-anymore-because-he-was-totally-hysterical Josh Groban cameo ("Josh Groban loves a blousey alcoholic"), my mind...is BLOWN.

[Bryan]

How could you possibly have missed "Who's Josh Groban? KILL YOURSELF!" as the line of the night? My friends and I are *still* quoting that. Although of the two you suggested, I'm positive "I feel like a woodland creature" is the superior.

I love the fact that pretty much everyone in the cast can sing (and let's face it, of all the plot devices to give Puck an excuse to sing, his being cougar-bait could not have been outdone). The songs last night were mediocre, but Victor Garber was excellent and, as always, Jane Lynch stole every scene she was in.

This episode was really all about the guys (and Mercedes who despite being in show choir lacks any semblance of gaydar), so it was a little dull for me: I'm waiting for Rachel, Emma, and Quinn to get more screen time. And speaking of Quinn, was that quip she made to Sue in the last couple minutes supposed to make her sympathetic? And does that mean she's going to stop trying so hard to beat on Rachel?

[Phil Zajdel]

Best line of the night is Kens'
"You know uh... when i get stressed i work out you can probably tell. So im going to down some power bars.......... knock out a few reps and come up with some solutions here."
Being a male 24 year old who watched the sopranos, sons of anarchy, ext it is hard to admit i love this show. I was a football wrestler and baseball playing high school and loved it but i always wanted to do something like this. I hope the best for this show and it lasted a while. One question after the show goes 3 seasons and Rachael is graduated... what then i think she is the "star" of the show.

[lee]

They wasted Josh Groban's appearance. Not only did he NOT sing (in a show about singing, not to mention an episode on "Acafella" singers) but the "satire" on his gentle personality by portraying him as a womanizer was painfully predictable.

[SOS]

I simply adore Victor Garber and hope he returns for many more guest spots, it's a shame to cast him in a musical show and not get to hear him sing, he has such a fantastic voice ... also, Jane Lynch is comic gold in this show, I can't help but laughing at pretty much anything she says.

[Brit]

I don't get people saying that the show is slowly getting worse. To me it has only gotten better. It is funny and leaves me wanting MORE. It also leaves little $1.29 transactions on my credit card after I go to itunes and buy the songs from the show!

[MontCedar]

"Now you might be thinking, why would a pop star like me come over here and talk to you. But let me tell you something. Throngs of screaming teenagers don't do it for Josh Groban. No. Josh Groban loves a blousy alcoholic."

Tremendous writing and delivery!

[Sarah]

The Sept 16 airing of "Glee" lost 850,000 viewers and 11 percent on the demo from the Sept 9th "Glee" ratings. Not a mention of that in this "spin driven" article. So much for responsible journalism.

The idea is to build audience, at least hold audience. But "Glee" lost 850,000 viewers in one week....down to 6.6 million viewers. And "Glee" had little or no competition.

But on September 23rd ...CBS will air the season premiere of Criminal Minds and NBC will air the season premiere of Law and Order: SVU against "Glee".

Expect further significant audience erosion for "Glee".

By the last week of October expect "Glee's" audience to be in the 4 millions and its demo in the 2's.

Considering the fortune FOX spent on P&A for "Glee" and how FOX execs put their careers on the line for this kiddie show..."Glee" should never have lost 850,000 viewers in one week.

Expect the corporate axe to swing once "Brothers" and "Dollhouse" air to beyond dismal ratings. (See Peter Ligouri)

FOX's Peter Rice in the future may want to consider attracting proven CBS development execs rather then the proven loser they recently brought in from NBC who claimed a revival of "Knightrider" was going to be huge.

And the beat goes on...

[Meris]

John Lloyd Young was fantastic as the thumbless Henri! I do wish they had feature his singer a little more, he's a Tony award winning Broadway singer! Also, I agree that is was such a waste that Josh Groban didn't sing!

[jen]

Sarah,
I think this is a show that has a particular audience that is just going to grow as word of mouth from the true believers kicks in -- they will lose the audience that sees this as a family-friendly "kiddie" show -- the High School Musical crowd is already alienated by some of the sex and wicked satire. I think though that they will pull more cable viewers. People who enjoy Flight of the Conchords, Weeds, and The Daily Show will appreciate the writing and the adventurous nature of the program. Think Ally Mc Beal, Ugly Betty and Desperate Housewives. As GLEE gets more word of mouth -- and social media sites like Facebook are moving on it -- the numbers will rebound. L&O SVU and Criminal Minds are no competition for the GLEE demographic.

[Connie]

GLEE will gain viewers. As 30 something former Drama and Musical performer, I absolutely ADORE these characters, not much has changed. My friends and I (from High School who all were in musical theatre together) are having GLEE viewing parties each week and recording whatever else is on. We find ourselves quoting GLEE in our everyday vernacular.

It may waiver a bit, but it will come out on top because fans of GLEE will be loyal fans.

"I'm going to have to ask you to smell your armpits, girls. That is the smell of failure. And you're stinking up my office..."