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‘Weeds’: Going to Van Nuys

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Going to Van Nuys. I wonder if that’s going to catch on as a phrase. I’m sure our friends north of the Ventura Freeway would rather not be associated with a “hoovering,” as Andy put it.

Nancy finally gets tired of having to take a translator to her obstetrician and decides to go see Alanis Morrisette instead. Dr. Alanis Morrisette. Well, You Oughta Know that while Nancy was Head Over Feet for Esteban, this pregnancy was kind of Uninvited. You Learn that Nancy is considering having this baby Under Rug Swept, possibly killing the one thing keeping her alive. It’s a little Ironic, don’t you think?

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Nancy leaves with her pregnancy to consider and a desire to plant herbs. Not the herbs that you’d think on “Weeds.” More the herbs that can help mask the smells of living with four men from Nancy’s pregnancy-enhanced nose.

No, the only people who seem to still be interested in those kind of herbs are Silas and Doug. Last week they signed a lease on their compassionate care medical marijuana dispensary. This week, they realized they didn’t have an inventory, so they went to see the Wizard. Not the guy behind the curtain who gives you a clock when you wanted a real heart, and not Fred Savage’s little brother who’s really good at Super Mario 3. This Wizard was a pot agent played by James Urbaniak. You might recognize him as Dwight Schrute’s best friend on “The Office,” or if you’re super-nerdy like me, you’ll know him as the voice of Doctor Venture.

Silas and Doug’s partnership reaches the boiling point of a punch, a hug, and an awkward walk away. The hat trick of male conflict resolution. Now that that’s all worked out, I hope they can go back to the Wizard and work things out. It would be nice to see more of Urbaniak, and if he keeps an Asian man with a sword as a bodyguard, think what he might have behind the other doors in his office.

While Silas and Doug work to become more legit, Shane sinks lower into the world of crime. After getting ripped off by his English teacher for nearly four grand worth of his brother’s pot, Shane came home for some nice, therapeutic bottle-smashing. With a little goading from Ignacio, Nancy’s current bodyguard, Shane goes to take back what’s his and a little extra.

But everyone was busy in this episode. Andy went on his date as Judah. He takes his imaginative and possibly deranged bank clerk out for fondue dressed like they’re in a John Hughes movie. She wants to relive her teenage date with Judah, up to the moment where she should have lost her virginity under a bridge. Must have been more romantic then. With the ambiance of homeless men doing homeless men things, I don’t think any amount of imagination could get Andy in the mood.

And Celia’s hiding out in the garage. So desperate for companionship she strikes up conversations with the men who come to remove Sucio’s body from the freezer. Poor Sucio. His first shower ever and he ends up in the ice box. At least we know he didn’t wander off naked.

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Though among all this light-hearted insanity, it happened. What everyone (at least me) has been waiting for. Someone finally called Nancy out. After her plants died and she found out that Shane is getting an F in English and Celia told her she’ll be staying as long as she wants, Nancy asks Andy and the universe why Armageddon keeps raining down on her. Without any twinge of his normally constant humor, Andy tells her: “You do it. You do know that. You have to know that it’s all you.”

About time someone said that. Nancy’s reaction was perfect. Her momentary breakdown.

I don’t know about her actions after that. Going to live with Esteban. I’m not sure if I was a fan of her going to Van Nuys, but this doesn’t seem much better.

-- Andrew Hanson

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