‘Project Runway’: Facetious and sarcastic

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Kenley Collins is clearly now one of the most obnoxious contestants ever on ‘Project Runway,’ but as I contemplated her imminent elimination from the show earlier Wednesday, I wondered who I’d have left to hate. Fortunately for me I don’t have to worry about that problem, as she and her bad attitude are around for another episode.

A fun, kind of pointless challenge was presented Wedneday night: Each of the designers had to create an outfit for one of the others inspired by a genre of music. Kenley drew hip-hop for Leanne Marshall and immediately began whining and moaning about how hard she had it. Then Kenley decided to go with -- what else? -- high-waisted jeans, because the only alternative to that was baggy, and to her that would look incredibly stupid. Now I am not an expert on hip-hop or fashion, but if I were in her shoes I’d try to think of potential muses, like Kimora Lee Simmons or Li’l Mama. Kenley went with Alicia Keyes --Jerell Scott was kind enough to point out that Keyes is actually an R&B performer but Kenley wasn’t hearing that, and thus was the end of the other contestants trying to help dear Kenley. However, Kenley was so determined that she was right that she was outright rude to Tim Gunn. I was glad that I wasn’t the only one feeling indignation on behalf of Tim -- 88% of the ‘Project Runway’ poll agreed that the chick needed to stop giving lip to her fabulous silver-haired elder. When, not surprisingly, her outfit didn’t make a splash on the runway, Kenley blamed it on Leanne. Never mind that if she had given her model, say, a slinky jersey dress and big hair and earrings and heels, Leanne might have worked the outfit an entirely different way.

If I’m being honest, though, I thought that aside from the horrific jeans, Kenley’s outfit turned out more hip-hop than I thought it would. I didn’t think Suede Baum’s rock ‘n’ roll outfit for Jerell was send-home worthy, but overall he’d been the weakest of the group -- I was just hoping that he’d be able to avenge Kenley’s stealing his model. I actually thought Leanne’s country outfit for Korto looked poorly made and cheap, and even though it was fun to see a change, I thought Jerell’s ‘Kenley Spears’ pop outfit looked a little like a Halloween costume, not a stage costume.

Suede went out as a good model, however, looking very punk in Korto’s design, even though he’s a classically trained cellist (who knew?). And while I will always, always love me some Cool James, the presence of LL Cool J was sort of a random addition to the show, other than to remind us that he has a clothing line out. I’m finding myself rooting for Korto as the group shrinks -- she’s not my favorite designer in the history of the show, but I like the way she approaches her work, and moreover she makes me laugh: ‘I’m gonna make this in muslin first ‘cause I’s no fool.’ If I had a quarter for every time I said that, I’d be rich. Oh, and I like her butt.

Again, teasers from the next episode indicate that Kenley’s getting worse still, practically putting Heidi Klum in her place. This would seem to indicate that Kenley really should be eliminated this next time, but the way the season’s going, Heidi would probably be eliminated before Kenley.

-- Claire Zulkey

(photo: Bravo)