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'The Real World': Sexual politics

May 3, 2007 | 12:58 am

Colie, come here. Let me give you a hug. Alex doesn't like you. He doesn't respect you. He's not interested.  You seem like a nice girl - Lord knows, you're the only one on The Real World who's ever been seen reading an actual, honest-to-God book, in hardcover nonetheless. But hooking up with studly Alex is a huge mistake. In the merry-go-round of booty that is The Real World: Denver, the hookup between Colie and Alex may be the most shocking - the player, and the girl who was in therapy because she was so needy as a kid that she couldn't be left home alone. This is not a match made in heaven.

In Wednesday's episode, Colie chucks girls-always-make-passes-at-cute-guys-in-glasses Adam for bootylicious roommate Alex, only to have the man-about-town kiss and tell to everyone in the house. Most appallingly, she paraphrases Bill Clinton in her rationale for getting too close for comfort with Alex - because oral sex isn't sex, per se. (Yep, here's your cue to ponder what "is" is.) To quote Tyrie: "You're a son of a bitch. I hate y'all. I do." Amen, Tyrie.  Because, of course, Colie promptly ditches Alex for Justin, a male model (like that job description doesn't send off a klaxon of warning sirens) she meets in a bar who promptly serves to, uh, to scratch her itch. It's this kind of jarring edit - I mean, does Colie have no sense at all? - it makes one wonder how much of the Real World is people being real...and how much is contrived at the hands of a clever editor. I'm all in favor of a compelling storyline - unless it seems forced, and makes the folks in the house seem more ugly than they already are.