‘America’s Next Top Model’: Anything with a kangaroo can’t be bad

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Take One: The models go down to Oz and mumble mouth their way through a Cover Girl commercial in Australian accents.

Take Two: The models - who should be seen, but not heard - go down to Oz and mumble mouth their way through a Cover Girl commercial in humiliating Australian accents.

Take Three: The models - who should be seen, but not heard - meet a kangaroo (and Tara dressed as a kangaroo), then go down to Oz and mumble mouth their way through a Cover Girl commercial in humiliating Australian accents.

Take Four: The models - who should be seen, but not heard - meet a kangaroo (and Tyra dressed as a kangaroo), then go down to Oz and mumble mouth their way through a Cover Girl commercial in humiliating Australian accents, which caused two of them to sob in frustration.

Take Five: The models - who should be seen, but not heard - meet a kangaroo (and Tyra dressed as a kangaroo), then go down to Oz and mumble mouth their way through a Cover Girl commercial in humiliating Australian accents, which caused two of them to sob in frustration, including Brittany, who was hit by a car five years ago and has trouble with her short-term memory.

There you have it, an hour of TV in five takes. Which is approximately 40 fewer takes than it took Jael, which is why Tyra whacked her - or, as the show taught us Wednesday night, made her ‘cactus’ - non-functional in Oz-speak.

Who says Top Model doesn’t teach anything?

(Photo courtesy The CW)