R. Kelly still trapped in closet; Adam Lambert released from jail
The R&B lothario R. Kelly, fresh off announcing his exquisitely titled memoir, "Soula Coaster," and a concert cruise in October (woe that David Foster Wallace isn't around to write about that one), has decided to revisit his ongoing serialized pop-opera "Trapped in the Closet." Kelly told TMZ he's written 32 new chapters in the Byzantine murder-adultery-utter-insanity saga, but is looking for investors before production, because "it costs a lot of money to do." This is clear evidence of a crisis in public arts funding in America.
Meanwhile, an ocean away but in no less dramatic fashion, "American Idol" favorite Adam Lambert was briefly detained in a Finnish jail after a brawl with his boyfriend Sauli Koskinen (a star of Finland's version of "Big Brother") spilled out of a Helsinki bar and into a crowd of bystanders. Both were detained, questioned and released, and neither suffered notable injury, though a mutual friend and former Miss Helsinki, Sofia Ruusila, was reportedly accidentally struck trying to separate them. Lambert explained it thusly on Twitter: "Jetlag+Vodka=blackout. Us÷blackout=irrational confusion. jail+guilt+press=lesson learned. Sauli+Adam+hangover burgers= laughing bout it."
-- August Brown
Photo: Sauli Koskinen, left, and singer Adam Lambert outside the Nokia Theatre in Los Angeles after arriving for "American Idol" Season 10's finale results show on May 25. Credit: Frazer Harrison / Getty Images