Inmate claims fictitious 'Festivus' religious holiday to score better food

An Orange County jail inmate caused a stir this year by successfully claiming the fictitious holiday Festivus, made famous on the television show “Seinfeld,” as part of his religious beliefs to score better meals.

Malcolm Alarmo King, 38, enjoyed “a high protein no salami diet 3 times per day for ‘Festivism’” according to a court order by Orange County Superior Court Judge Derek G. Johnson.

King, who was serving a one-year sentence at Theo Lacy Jail for a drug offense, also got the judge to sign off on double portions of kosher meals three times a day in a bizarre arrangement first reported by the Orange County Register.

Before long, jail personnel familiar with the “Seinfeld” episode that popularized "Festivus for the rest of us” as an alternative to the commercialism of the holiday season were snickering about the inmate’s request, which they suspected was less than legitimate.

“People picked up on it pretty quick and said this wasn't right,” said Cmdr. Dave Wilson of the Orange County Sheriff’s Department.

When correctional officers interviewed King about his religious convictions in May, he changed his story, saying he believed in “Healthism.”

Officers concluded double portions were not medically necessary and that King “did not not hold a sincere religious belief that requires a restrictive kosher diet,” Wilson said.

Festivus, as explained by the character George Costanza and his father in a 1997 episode of “Seinfeld,” includes the customary Airing of Grievances, Feats of Strength and an aluminum Festivus pole in place of a Christmas tree.

Kosher meals or double helpings are not a part of the faux holiday.

Still, it didn’t stop King from enjoying customized meals for months until the county got them thrown out in court. He was released in October.

Read the Orange County Sheriff’s Department’s records on King's Festivus-inspired requests here.

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--Tony Barboza

Photo: Malcolm Alarmo King. Credit: Orange County Sheriff's Department

Comments

[kimd]

Good Lord.

[westsidejesse]

Closed mouths do not get fed...even thou the guy seems like a swindler, have to give him credit for trying and pulling it off for a little while.

[coastal eddie]

When is this judge up for election? He has got to go. He can be the subject of our grievances during Festivus.

[Brad]

And people wonder why the stae is so broke, because we cater to the criminals in our prisons.

[Coach Rollie]

Gotta love the effort!

[AJT]

How is it that this man can get special kosher meals for a holiday that doesn't exist and yet there are prisoners who die because they don't get needed medication?

[Ralph]

It was a Festivus miracle!

[LilySweet]

Too bad he doesn't use his "smarts" for good. What a waste. However, I do have questions about the judge's smarts.

[joe]

Good 4 him. Next time im locked up I might try that 1!

[Joe Pod]

There are so many things wrong with this story, I don't even know where to begin!!! The bottom line is this judge is an idiot, the criminal seems to be so for many reasons, and the system failed! How dare a "criminal" have special rights outside of what has already been given to them? What a shame that a case like this would even make it before a judge.

Hey, your honor...do you have a laptop in your courtroom or an assistant that does? Did anyone bother to google "festivus" before or during the case? Should it really be this easy to make you the butt of hundreds of jokes? Oh, what college did you graduate? I'd like to propose an immediate academic investigation as it seems they don't give the legitimate lessons and foundations for attorneys-turned-judges the fundamental and critical thinking skills to make solid decisions founded on reason.

Well done California...you've managed to make a fool of us all yet again!!!

[Richard]

They don't call them "CON"-vict's for nothing he should have ran for office would have made a Great Politian.

[Joe Pod]

Is there an email or mailing address for this judge? Should he not be sent letters by EVERY tax paying citizen of Orange County? If a child did something so thoughtless would they not be scolded? Then why should the dishonorable judge not pay the price too? Idiot...goes to show that society is really falling apart thanks to the uber-liberal state we call home.

Wake up OC and CA!!! Get people like this judge out of their positions for more traditional values judges who will actually uphold the law!

[Sam Sindaha]

well, maybe it will make up for the time( about12 years ago) that the OC county Sheriff's daughter had the contract to provide food for OC inmates and shorted them for her own profit.

[swhitS]

People believe anything including Judges............ LMAO
He gets a high 5 from me!

[colinsfriend]

My guess is he thought Festivus was a Jewish holiday and figured he could force a diet change.

[steve rodriguez]

And the ACLU is trying to abolish Christmas from the American scene.

[kuruc]

make the "judge" pay for these extra meals!

[Rob M.]

The prisons should be like the county jail in Phoenix with Sheriff Joe... give the prsion slugs nothing but day old bread and boloney and make them wear pink jump suits.

This guy is a clown and trash of society.

[RWh]

Here's an idea. if you want to eat your meal of choice (even those dictated by religious belief), don't commit the crime as the jail system is non-denominational.

[Jack]

Is anyone else bothered by the fact that the state grants special privileges for ANY religious reason--made up or no? If you think about it carefully, all religions in the world are as man-made as "festivus." Just because millions of people subscribe to some mythical notion doesn't make it any more legit.

Unlike race, national origin, gender, and sexual orientation (trust me on this one), religion is a CHOICE. So, I decide that I am going to place restrictions on my own diet because of the wishes of some imaginary being. And, now the state must accomodate me even if it means additional costs. How on earth does this make ANY sense? Someone please enlighten me.

[Downtown Dan]

Can't blame the guy for taking advantage of every opportunity available. He's knows they're going to accommodate for fear of accusations of improper treatment, blah blah blah.

On that note, Happy Festivus! We honored the day this morning (http://bit.ly/evoAl5). Actually not a bad idea for a holiday when you think about it.

[Sara]

Why is it that people are so quick to judge and say " he is a prisoner bread and whatever for him" our system is so ass backwards did you ever stop to think maybe it is not always the case that the inmate is such a bad person. You get caught with marijuana and you go to prison does that mean they really deserve years of hunger and the treatment they get when child molesters get minimum punishment. Drugs of any kind are much bigger punishment than rape of a child and all of you followers just love judging when you see some article that blows everything out of proportion. One day you never know what could happen and the tables will be turned what if you have two beers drive home and accidentally hit someone who is injured you will be in prison for a long long time. If you smoke weed and get caught you could be in prison you just never know!!!!