Sandy Banks: Leave Silda Spitzer alone

Even on the Left Coast, there's been lots of finger-wagging about New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer's call-girl escapade. And lots of snarky scrutiny of his wife.

Some women feel betrayed by Silda Wall Spitzer's decision to stand alongside her husband as he apologized -- and later resigned -- because of his trip to Washington, D.C., to consort with a high-priced young call girl.  On the night before Valentine's Day, no less.

We women tend to take this kind of thing personally.

But any long marriage survives on unspoken pacts, commitments and sacrifices. Maybe she likes the power of political life and is trying to prop her husband up. Maybe she'd rather have him see a prostitute than take on a lover, Giuliani style. Maybe she wants to demonstrate for her three teenage daughters what enduring love sometimes requires.

We have no way of knowing, and no need to know. Silda's choice is the province of a husband and wife. Yes, what he did was humiliating. Her drawn face conveyed her pain. She doesn't need our disapproval. And she doesn't owe us an explanation.

-- Sandy Banks

Photo: Carolyn Cole / Los Angeles Times

Comments

[KWinn]

Perhaps this comes from the interview that was widely publicized where Mrs. Spitzer spoke about Billary and commented on why why would HIllary remain with Bill when he cheated; she said she wouldn't if that was her situation and lo and behold..here we go. I just feel sorry for her myself just like I did Hillary. This men are thinking with the "other head" and it's disgusting. My heartfelt prayers to Mrs. Spitzer and their children. Children can be cruel and to put these young women thru this is deplorable. Stay strong Mrs. Spitzer but make sure your daughters know that this type of behavior by a husband is not acceptable..may not be grounds for divorce (would for me but then..i'm a nobody) but definitely punishment!!

[sjen]

Bravo!

I am sick of reading about people second guessing and/or belittling Silda's actions, especially from women.

Anyone who's been married or been in long term live-in relationships should know better not to judge.

What Silda and her 3 girls need at time like this is blessings. Instead of debating if Silda should stand by her man or not, people should say a prayer for her and her girls.

[guity]

Finally, some sanity. Thanks!