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A dictionary for warped minds

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This article was originally on a blog post platform and may be missing photos, graphics or links. See About archive blog posts.

Last week the Oxford English Dictionary announced March additions to its pages, include FYI, OMG, email (not e-mail) and La-La Land. But something it hasn’t added yet are brightly colored pictures.

Those can be found in ‘My First Dictionary’ by Ross Horsely. Colorful illustrations are not unusal in dictionaries for children -- but this may be the only one intent, as its subtitle says, in ‘corrupting young minds one word at a time.’

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The images are from an actual 1950s chldren’s book and have been repurposed by Horsley, a British librarian, to his nefarious ends.

The book, which went on sale in Feburary, contains entries that look childish but are not at all suited for children. Some are homicidal. For instance, a picture of two teacups accompanies the word ALIKE:

Tommy and Granny’s drinks are alike. They look similar. If only Tommy could remember which one he put the arsenic in.

Some are dirty. A girl writes at a desk with BACKFIRED:

Lucille’s plan backfired. It had the opposite effect of what she intended. Her teacher actually gave her a lower grade after reciving oral sex from her during detention.

And some are rather bacchanalian. A woman reclines in a chair on a covered PORCH:

A porch is a sheltered area at the front of a house. Mother has passed out on the porch after too many mint juleps.

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