'Chloe Sevigny' and the Ministry of Gossip wish you a fabulous holiday

 

We at the Ministry give and give and give -- breaking news, fabulous party reports, top-to-bottom premiere coverage and gratuitous beefcake and cheesecake, naked cellphone pictures -- until we're blue in the face.

Yes, we still have more. Why? Because we're givers, and so is Chloe Sevigny-- or at least the version of her from the brilliant team that produces our new obsession, a series of virals lampooning the impossibly chic and offbeat actress with accuracy so sharp we thought we'd been stuck with the wrong end of a vintage Christian Lacroix brooch. 

Enjoy Chloe's holiday love, and please accept the Ministry's love to you and yours. See you after holidee.

(Or as soon somebody else famous gets in trouble.)

-- Matt Donnelly and Christie D'Zurilla
Twitter.com/MattDonnelly
Twitter.com/dzurillaville

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PREACH IT! And the Lady Gaga 'Telephone' spoofing trend officially ends ... now

Photo: The real Chloe Sevigny at the premiere of "Somewhere" in Hollywood on Dec. 7, 2010. Credit: Jason Merritt / Getty Images

PREACH IT! And the Lady Gaga Telephone spoofing trend officially ends ... now

Enough with the “Telephone”. We’ve had the original video, the homage from our boys in Afghanistan, the all-chicken interpretation and a dude who swapped out the communication hardware with tropical fruit.

All of those were, to be fair, kind of cute. A few were even funny at the time. But now the self-serving famewhore section of the evangelical Christian movement has jumped in. Which means the whole thing has jumped the shark.

The details involve Megan Phelps, of course, granddaughter of Westboro Baptist Church leader Fred. She has rewritten the words and recorded the song as “Ever Burn” -- as in, in hell.

“Stop prayin', stop prayin', God will not hear you anymore, you taught the boys and the girls to be proud whores," Phelps sort-of sings. You can hear the whole God-forsaken mess here.

Phelps, apparently quite fond of the word “whore,” has used it to skewer Gaga before. Behold, her take on Poker Face, but be warned: It’s anything but holy.

We can’t decide which is sadder about Phelps’ ploy: the whole, tired, god-hates-you angle, or the fact that she’s spreading her desperate message through what is, arguably -- nay, officially -- the most shopworn gag of 2010.

--Leslie Gornstein

Photo: Lady Gaga in concert at Carnegie Hall. Credit: Kevin Kane / Getty Images

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