Kim Kardashian threatens to sue over infidelity story; Edie Falco asks, Kim who?

Kim Kardashian doesn't like it when you mess with her, or her man. The reality TV starlet has denied allegations made by In Touch magazine that she cheated on her now-fiance Kris Humphries with the New England Patriots' Bret Lockett, and she plans to sue the mag for defamation and the NFL player for shooting off his mouth.

This coming on the heels of rumors that she might be pregnant, rumors that she adamantly shut down.

In Touch's current cover story alleges that Kardashian was involved with Lockett for five months while she was courted by Humphries, who popped the question to Lady K after six months of dating.

The tabloid cited text messages exchanged between Kardashian and Lockett and quoted the NFL player as saying Kardashian was the one who "pursued" him.

"I knew this was a game to her, and this is what she does," Lockett is quoted as saying. The magazine adds that their flirtatious messaging started when Kardashian's friend Lauren London told Lockett's brother Colin that Kim wanted Bret's phone number.

"This is absolutely not true," Kardashian told E! News. "I have no idea who this person is."

"For the record, none of the facts ... are accurate," Kardashian lawyer Dennis A. Roach wrote in a demand letter to the magazine's counsel. He asserted that the facts cited by the mag were fabricated and were "at a minimum, damaging, defamatory and an invasion of her privacy."

Roach added that the weekly should "immediately refrain from publishing, distributing or disseminating any factually untrue and unsubstantiated information." If not, Roach said, he "will be forced to take appropriate legal action to protect my client's rights."

As for the blushing bride-to-be, she doesn't seem to appreciate the distraction from her wedding blitz.

"Remember, people only rain on your parade because they're jealous of your sun & tired of their shade," she tweeted Wednesday.

In other Kim K news, the reality star needn't worry about inviting Edie Falco to the wedding. The "Nurse Jackie" star apparently has no idea who Kardashian is.

"Like, forgive me, I don't know if you're friends with her -- but who the hell is Kim Kardashian?" Falco asked New York magazine's Vulture blog.

"Like, who are these people and why are they famous and why are they advertising things and being asked their opinions about things? I just don't understand what these people did to be in a position of having everyone ask their opinions about stuff," Falco said. "I mean, if there's something about her personality or something that she's accomplished or her philosophy on something -- but beyond that I don't understand what's happening. It's actually frightening."

Oh, Edie. If you only knew -- we ask ourselves the same questions every day.

RELATED:

Khloe Kardashian 'loves' her six-minute, televised nip-slip

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries: Will they sign a pre-nup?

Kim Kardashian (or should we say Humphries) addresses pregnancy rumors but not name change

-- Nardine Saad
twitter.com/NardineSaad

Photos, from top: Kris Humphries and fiancee Kim Kardashian; the latest In Touch magazine cover. Credits: Pascal Le Segretain / Getty Images; In Touch

Pregnant 'Jersey Shore' alum Angelina Pivarnick no longer engaged

Angelina Pivarnick is still pregnant, but the "Jersey Shore" alumna and Dave Kovacs are no longer engaged. The couple have broken off their brief engagement, which followed an even briefer romance. 

Kovacs, whose ex-fiancee confirmed earlier this week that she was pregnant, said they broke up when he found out Pivarnick was being unfaithful. Guess that will make her a single mom, just like January Jones.

"I'm going through a really tough time right now," Kovacs told RadarOnline. "I have ended things with Angelina."

Her former beau, who proposed to the terribly tan villainess in February, claimed that he discovered texts from various men when he went through her phone. (Um, Sammie-Ronnie much?)

"I got a text from a firefighter who actually apologized for sleeping with Angelina, saying he just found out she was engaged," Kovacs said. According to Radar, she'd been going on secret trips to Long Island to meet up with said firefighter.

"I actually found a pair of guy's underwear in her car," he added. "I truly fell in love with this girl and wanted to have a family and grow old with her."

Shady, but such is life at the shore. No wonder her castmates banished her twice. But -- is it wrong to wonder whether he is indeed her baby daddy?

RELATED:

"Jersey Shore" villainess Angelina Pivarnick is pregnant

January Jones pregnant, looking forward to "life as a single mom"

PREACH IT! Pass the peppehs, we're going down the shore (the "Jersey Shore," that is)

— Nardine Saad
Twitter.com/NardineSaad

Photo: Angelina Pivarnick. Credit: Emily Shur / MTV

Trust Miss USA Rima Fakih -- we Americans always wear stripper heels with our oversized eagle wings

For anyone who's visiting this blog from outside the United States -- and we know you're there, 'cause you comment like crazy on posts about Michael Jackson and Angelina Jolie -- let the Ministry of Gossip break the news to you gently:  Americans don't dress like you think we dress.

The myths about Americans cruising around comfortably in Levi's and T-shirts? Or maybe in cheaply made stretch pants and XXXL T-shirts? Lies, lies, lies.

Here in the land of the free and the home of the brave, we prefer to dress like Miss USA Rima Fakih did in the run-up to Monday's Miss Universe Pageant -- in golden-eagle outfits designed by a Victoria's Secret costumer and modeled after the bird on the presidential seal. 

Hey, y'all should see what we wear on the weekends.

-- Christie D'Zurilla

Photo: Miss USA Rima Fakih poses during a parade at the Mandalay Bay Resort and Casino in Las Vegas on Aug. 16, 2010. Credit: Patrick Prather / Reuters / Miss Universe Organization

Bill Cosby is not dead -- and he's not pleased about a fourth death hoax

Bill Cosby called in to "Larry King Live" on Monday night to chat about his death -- the death that happened only in the context of an Internet hoax propagated on Twitter. No, Bill Cosby is not dead.

"Emotional friends have called about this misinformation," he said on his own Twitter account. "To the people behind the foolishness, I’m not sure you see how upsetting this is."

This is the fourth time it's happened, the comedian says, and it's just not funny anymore. (Was it ever?) "This time, people are not amused by this," he told CNN (listen here -- and make sure you know first who Stephen Wright is -- we imagine host Kyra Phillips wishes she did).

Cosby told about his daughter calling to check if he was OK, about a restaurateur friend calling after his son and the people in his restaurant had started crying, about Malcolm Jamaal Warner's mom calling to check on his health.

Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie settle lawsuit over breakup story

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie -- who still aren't breaking up -- on Thursday won their privacy claim against News of the World, the British tabloid that in January reported they'd visited a divorce attorney and negotiated an agreement to split. 

Remember that story? The one the Ministry of Gossip called foul on from the beginning, slapping on an appropriately foul headline to match?

The News of the World, owned by Rupert Murdoch's News Corp., has agreed to publish an apology, as well as pay an undisclosed sum to cover the couple's costs and damages, the BBC reports. The money will be donated to the Jolie-Pitt Foundation, the actors' charity.

The paper argued it had acted in good faith, but the court didn't buy it; the divorce attorney cited in the story said he'd never met the two.

Pitt and Jolie, who are not married, were in Los Angeles this week for the premiere of Jolie's spy thriller "Salt," and she's slated to appear at Comic-Con in San Diego.

-- Christie D'Zurilla

Photo: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie at the premiere of "Salt" in Hollywood on Monday. Credit: Jason Merritt / Getty Images

Related dispatches from the Ministry of Gossip:

If Brad and Angelina split, would they be Bran and Gelina? 

Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt are suing tabloid over breakup story

At the 'Salt' premiere, a dash of Angelina Jolie and friends [video]

Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt light up the 'Salt' premiere [pictures]

Angelina Jolie confirmed to attend Comic-Con 2010

Mel Gibson isn't moving to Australia -- but you knew that

Mel Gibson gossips have been on fire over a British tabloid story claiming the actor was packing up and moving to Australia -- a story the Ministry considered "on fire" like a prankster's flaming bag of dog mess on a front porch.

It's a story that involves "no truth," Gibson's rep, Alan Nierob, told NBC on Monday. Nierob is the rep who's reportedly been told by Gibson's lawyers to keep his mouth shut during the current scandal -- yet apparently the Australian relocation fabrication was dead-wrong enough to merit a comment. 

Why did we hate and ignore this story from the moment we saw it linked on the Drudge Report? 

It claimed that Gibson's sale of his "New York mansion" was indicative of this alleged escape plan.

Levi Johnston apologizes to Sarah Palin for 'not completely true' statements [poll]

Watch CBS News Videos Online

Levi Johnston, who famously insinuated awhile back that Sarah Palin and her husband, Todd, were on the verge of divorce, has told People exclusively that, shoot, he might've been a little bit angry at the time over his breakup with Bristol Palin and might've engaged in a little bit of, you know, fibbing and stuff.

Which means that all or part of what he said in October 2009 in a clip from "The Early Show," above, may or may not be true.

So, maybe it's not technically "lying" if you're just saying things that are just "not completely true"? That's what Johnston says he was doing. Because he was upset about breaking up with Bristol. Which happened in March 2009. 

Must've been a hard breakup to get over, because in an October 2009 interview with "Entertainment Tonight," Johnston was asked if he thought the Palin relationship was headed for divorce -- rumors that a Palin representative denied at the time.

"I'm sure it is. Just like she decided she was going to quit [being the] governor [of Alaska], just was waiting for the right time, they're gonna wait it out. They're gonna be smart, they're do it when the time is right." 

That coming after a September 2009 interview with Vanity Fair in which he'd trashed ...

PREACH IT! Mel Gibson isn’t sorry, never was, end of story

Four years ago, when Mel Gibson got arrested for drunken driving and delivered the anti-Semitic rant heard 'round the world, he took his time delivering his mea culpas. A day after his arrest, he issued a vague apology, but it was aimed largely at the cops who arrested him. It barely addressed the millions of others he offended by opining that Jews are "responsible for all the wars in the world."

Three days after that, Gibson finally got around to the Jewish community.


"The tenets of what I profess to believe necessitate that I exercise charity and tolerance as a way of life," he intoned. "Every human being is God's child, and if I wish to honor my God I have to honor his children. But please know from my heart that I am not an anti-Semite. I am not a bigot. Hatred of any kind goes against my faith."

Cynics (and maybe one or two clear thinkers) blew him off. But many, many more people didn’t. Apologists flocked to comments boards worldwide, proclaiming that it was time to leave the poor guy alone, that some jerks in the media would never be satisfied, that he clearly had suffered enough.

Most importantly, defenders insisted, the apology really so totally proved that Gibson is so, so not a bigot, and all you "haters" -- because anyone who continued to question Gibson couldn’t possibly have reasonable reasons to do so -- could just sit down and shut up.

Cut to 2010. A brand-new, even more bigoted rant from Gibson ...

PREACH IT! Another post, another chance for Justin Bieber fans to get all worked up

You may have noticed that we here at Preach It! haven’t exactly jumped on the Justin Bieber bandwagon. Instead, we have, once or twice, jumped all over Justin Bieber. The posts usually stem from Bieber’s attitude, which falls somewhere between that of Diddy and Henry the Eighth. Our criticisms are inevitably blasted by hard-core Beliebers, who insist that Justin is as grounded and sweet as his overheated PR machine says he is.

But every time we think we should reconsider our stance, the same thing happens: We’re bashed over the head with some new article or interview about how humble Bieber is -- and then almost immediately field about some fresh account illustrating just how obnoxious the “grounded” teen really is. Preach It! does not hate on 16-year-olds. We cannot, however, stand their ham-handed propaganda attaches.

Newest case in point: Bieber recently went on Oprah. He took great care to outline how his mom punishes him when he acts up.

PREACH IT! Naomi Campbell strikes again -- literally

Another day, another smackdown for some mortal who dares to speak unto Naomi Campbell. The glamazon is already infamous for her fashionable fists of fury, having faced accusations of assaulting more than a half-dozen people, including, but not limited to, a maid and a driver. Now comes word that Campbell has turned her wrath on the press.

The whole scrum started at an interview. ABC News sat down with Campbell this week to discuss, among other things, the current war-crimes tribunal against former Liberian President Charles Taylor. Taylor is accused of using blood diamonds to fuel a campaign of terror against the neighboring country of Sierra Leone, and there’s a story going around that Taylor once gave Campbell just such a blood diamond.

The war-crimes prosecutors would love to talk to Campbell to confirm that story; it sure would help send Taylor to jail, after all. But so far, she’s declined to cooperate. When ABC asked her about the blood diamond, Campbell got antsy.

"I didn't receive a diamond and I'm not going to speak about that," Campbell told ABC News. She then ended the interview. And punched the camera in a producer's hand.

Actually, there’s some indication that Campbell isn’t merely a bully but also, maybe, a liar. Take it away, ABC:

Campbell's alleged receipt of a "blood diamond" first surfaced after actress Mia Farrow told prosecutors she heard Campbell describe a "huge diamond" she had received from Taylor. "You don't forget when a girlfriend tells you she was given a huge diamond in the middle of the night," Farrow told ABC News. ... "She said during the night, some men had knocked at her door and she, half asleep, had opened the door and it was representatives of President Charles Taylor and that they had given her a huge diamond," Farrow told ABC News. "We were like, 'oh my gosh.'"

Does all this add up to evidence that Campbell is being dishonest with the law? Possibly. But it definitely proves something else: She hasn’t changed. Like so many other celebrities who have been given second and third chances, Campbell has been at this bullying-and-denial business for -- no joke -- a decade now, catwalking in and out of anger-management classes and courtrooms.

In a February interview with CNN, she called herself a “work in progress” who has nonetheless faced her "demons." Maybe she and her demons need to pencil in a few more meetings.

-- Leslie Gornstein

Photo: Naomi Campbell speaks at a Women for Women International campaign at the Brooklyn Bridge on March 8, 2010, in New York City. Moments later, Campbell calmly sold the bridge to onlookers who'd been admiring her collection of anger-management certificates. Credit: Andrew H. Walker / Getty Images.

If you believed everything you read in the caption above, don't bother touring the Preach It! archives. Want the headlines? Follow the Ministry of Gossip on Twitter (we're @LATcelebs) or become a fan on Facebook at facebook.com/ministryofgossip.