PREACH IT! Lindsay Lohan, you are no Paris Hilton

This week, Lindsay Lohan was offered a pretty interesting gig. Every year, the Vienna Opera Ball -- the height of the Austrian social season -- attracts the elitest of the European elite. Per Wikipedia, it’s evening dress all the way: white tie and tails for men, floor-length ball gowns for women.

Also every year, Austrian businessman Richard Lugner famously invites a female American celebrity to, you know, class up the joint. Ritzy dates of past years have included Carmen Electra, Paris Hilton, Nicollete Sheridan, Dita Von Teese, Pamela Anderson and Geri “Ginger Spice” Halliwell.

Lindsay Lohan was supposed to be Lugner’s date this year. Instead, she reportedly missed her flight.

(She was busy looking around at the duty-free shops at the airport, see. The pilot apparently held the plane for a while -- remember that the next time an airline agent refuses to check you in because you’re “too late” -- but eventually had to bail.)

Celebs, designers react to Alexander McQueen's death

Innovative and always offbeat, the late British fashion designer Alexander McQueen, better known as "Lee," claimed devotees as varied as singer Lady Gaga, actress Sarah Jessica Parker and First Lady Michelle Obama. Condolences in the wake of his death Thursday came from many quarters.

"Alexander McQueen today announces the tragic news that Lee McQueen, the founder and designer of the Alexander McQueen brand, has been found dead at his home," his office said in a statement.

"I can't describe the tragic loss of such a brilliant man and designer," stylist Rachel Zoe tweeted this morning.

Katy Perry tweeted: "Rest In Peace Alexander McQueen. Just woke up, so sad."

Gaga featured the designer's popular "Alien" shoes in her video for "Bad Romance," and the first lady recently sported one of his bold pinstripe suits.

McQueen trained as a Saville Row tailor at 16 (later making suits for Prince Charles) and hit the big time when Tatler magazine editor Isabella Blow plucked him from design school obscurity. Blow took her own life three years ago.

Hello! You're most attractive, KStew and Hugh Laurie!

The Ministry loves nonscientific online polls in general, but when we were tipped to this one via tweets from @kstewartnews and @kstewartfans, we got a pleasant surprise with a cherry on top: Seems Hugh Laurie has edged out Robert Pattinson for "most attractive male" in Hello! magazine's annual survey hottie survey. 

Not that we wish anything ill for Mr. Pattinson; not at all. Rather, the idea that Laurie has enough fans out there that he could break through by a slim margin and score one for the, um, "more experienced" team tickles us no end.

Pretty cool, also, that a fresh face like Kristen Stewart's rallied the votes to blow away the competition for "most attractive woman." Britney Spears in second place? Suffice to say she was a distant second. Color us puzzled.

Nicole Kidman, Madonna, Fergie and friends light up New York's 'Nine' premiere

Nicole Kidman, Daniel Day-Lewis, Penelope Cruz, Kate Hudson, Marion Cotillard, Fergie and Judi Dench all hit the red carpet Tuesday night for the rollout of "Nine" in New York -- resulting in a virtual fame explosion at the Ziegfeld Theatre.

Now if only some stars would help promote the movie musical.

No film this year has a celeb-packed ensemble like Rob Marshall's new one does -- and nary a lunch, photo call or premiere (including the Dec. 9 event in L.A.) has taken place without obscenely A-list attendance from the "Nine" cast. The arrival photos are below, but even more delicious Tuesday night in New York were ...

Lily Allen lands dream job: designing a fully stocked bar for Elton John

Rare is the girl who gets it all, but Lily Allen may have achieved personal nirvana last night across the pond. The songstress got to design a musical bar, packed to the gills in premium vodka, at Grey Goose's Character & Cocktails gala hosted by Elton John.

Allen is open about her affinity for booze (thus, we're open about our love of Lily Allen), so who better to recruit for such a top shelf project?

Lily's creation consisted of four travel cases (just like the ones she uses on the road), that serve as full standing Goose bar, coffee table loaded with media such as a record player, and two lush hunter benches.

The installation, titled "Lil Box of Tracks," fetched $160,000 in an auction benefiting Sir Elton's AIDS charity.

Check out a shot of the bar, and more pics of attendees such as Kevin Spacey, Elizabeth Hurley and Kelly Rowland after the jump! 

-- Matt Donnelly

Photo: Lily Allen sips a Grey Goose confection while lounging at her own pop-up bar. We sincerely hope she has got replicas at home, on the tour bus and perhaps an inflatable set for spontaneous sidewalk drinking. Credit: Grey Goose