Miss Universe Pageant judges named -- bikinis included

Oh, Miss Universe Pageant, you had us at "bikinis."

That said, the Miss Universe Pageant has also named its judges for 2010: husband and wife William Baldwin and Chynna Phillips, Olympic medalist Evan Lysacek and illusionist Criss Angel are but a few of the folks who'll soon join co-hosts Natalie Morales and Bret Michaels in Las Vegas.

Perhaps it's not quite as exciting as learning who'll judge the next season of "American Idol" -- unless you're Donald Trump. "When you combine the world's most beautiful women, bikinis, a rock star, and a panel of top celebrity judges, you have a recipe for success," the Donald said in a statement Wednesday. 

True. We were actually going to run a picture of a judge or two, but forget that -- you get a shot of a couple of contestants preparing poolside for the competition. Oh, we lie, we lie, that's not all. We went nuts and added a shot of bikini-clad contestants in the pool, below.

Bikini-clad for the good old U.S. of A. will be Miss USA Rima Fakih, of course (hit the links below if you forgot the non-raunchy non-scandal that surrounded her acquisition of that crown).

In addition to the 83 contestants who'll attempt to dazzle with their evening gowns, interviews and ...

Bret Michaels to co-host the 2010 Miss Universe Pageant

The Donald apparently sticks with the people he trusts -- Bret Michaels, who won Donald Trump's third "Celebrity Apprentice" cycle, has been tapped to co-host Trump's upcoming Miss Universe Pageant, the organization announced Tuesday.

Michaels joins a roster of male hosts that over the years has included Dick Clark, Bob Barker and Johnny Carson -- though the most recent male hosts have been Billy Bush, Jerry Springer and Mario Lopez.

The event, which features Natalie Morales of the "Today" show co-hosting with the former Poison frontman, will be held in Las Vegas on Aug. 23. 

So, is it terribly right or terribly, terribly wrong for a hair-metal rocker to host a beauty pageant? Let us know in the poll after the jump.

-- Christie D'Zurilla

Report: Carrie Prejean's wedding set for Friday in San Diego [updated]

Carrie Prejean will marry fiancé Kyle Boller on Friday at a hotel in San Diego, according to a report. The former beauty queen and the NFL quarterback, who started dating in July, have been engaged since February.

We assume Perez Hilton won't be on the guest list.

Boller, who was with the St. Louis Rams in 2009, signed with the Oakland Raiders in April.

Seems getting things done in a hurry is in the air these days -- Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green's wedding, Lady Gaga climbing the Forbes list, Sandra Bullock and Jesse James and their divorce, Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi and their split.

The most rational thing we can figure: Last Saturday's lunar eclipse is indeed compressing time. And yes, we're aware that's not exactly rational at all.

-- Christie D'Zurilla

[For the record, 12:30 p.m.: An earlier version of this post said the wedding was planned for Saturday. As the headline says, it's a Friday event.]

Photo: Carrie Prejean at a news conference in New York on May 12, 2009. Credit: Bebeto Matthews / Associated Press

Related dispatches from the Ministry of Gossip:

Carrie Prejean engaged to Rams quarterback Kyle Boller

Enough Carrie Prejean news to make your head explode

Getting a grip on Miss USA Rima Fakih's stripper-pole past [poll]

Oh, sweet heavens -- newly crowned Miss USA 2010 Rima Fakih put her back to a pole in 2007, when she was 21, and slid down it in front of a crowd, and we're all supposed to freak out over the pictures nobody ever tried to hide? Photos that are well within the boundaries of our Hooters culture? Not to mention marginally less suggestive than photos that were part of the contest?

"I feel really good about [Fakih's win] because she's from Michigan, and especially from Dearborn," a local business owner told the Detroit News for an article ominously headlined "As Metro Detroit rejoices, stripper contest casts pall for Miss USA Rima Fakih." It's an article that, mind you, is about 90% packed with quotes enthusiastically supporting Fakih, but also includes mention of the 2007 "Stripper 101" radio contest at which the "new" pics were snapped. 

Those offended by the presence of a person next to a pole in short pants might want to avoid this photo gallery of men "pole dancing" for an exercise class in Miami Beach. Miley Cyrus fans may ...

Miss USA Rima Fakih's throbbing nonscandal -- would someone just get the young lady some pizza?

Rima Fakih smiled, she thanked Donald Trump for "hiring" her, she didn't fall while walking in her gown.

What's left for the newest Miss USA except for the requisite scandal, right? This time it comes via MySpace in the form of a 2008 short film, "Throbbing Justice," in which the former Miss Michigan appears surrounded by some of the worst non-adult-film acting ever.

And get this -- she's fully clothed. And wait! A guy who worked on the film recalls her wanting very much to stay that way, Freep.com reports. Oh, the scandal!!

So of course, the Ministry had to go to the video's MySpace page check out the train wreck. Oddly, no crowd formed around our vast cubicle empire, not even when a plastic penis was hurled across the screen as a weapon or when the American flag was used as a hospital blanket. (Neither of those scenes, for the record, included the future Miss USA, who appears mercifully briefly.)

Full disclosure: Not for lack of trying, the Ministry didn't make it through the whole Mantastic Films video because, at our advanced age, we tend to doze off after 15 minutes or so of anything.

Also, on Sunday night, the Ministry couldn't help but really like this girl when, in answer to the how-do-you-feel-now-that-you've-won question, she replied,  "Ask me after I've had a pizza."

Our message to Fakih? Honey, when we were your age, we were in lousy student and "indie" short films too and didn't even approach how you look in a bikini. Comedy is hard. You kept your shirt on. It happens. And if it's any consolation, you come off looking a lot better than pretty much the entire rest of the cast. Which, now that we think about it, probably isn't that difficult, given your whole "beauty queen" thing.

Gotta go. Pizza time.

-- Christie D'Zurilla

Photo: Rima Fakih, 24, competes in the swimwear segment of the 2010 Miss USA competition on Sunday in Las Vegas. Credit: Darren Decker / EPA / Miss Universe Organization LP, LLLP.

The Ministry of Gossip is just pulsating with nonspecific scandalous happenings. Want all our headlines? Follow the Ministry of Gossip on Twitter (we're @LATcelebs) or 'like' us into your news feed on Facebook.

Carrie Prejean engaged to Rams quarterback Kyle Boller

After daring to have an opinion about marriage that not everyone agreed with, former beauty queen Carrie Prejean has done the unthinkable and actually gotten engaged to be married.

Oh, the scandal!

(Wait, what scandal? There's actually no scandal here whatsoever. Move along, people.)

Carrie's fiance is St. Louis Rams quarterback Kyle Boller, who has an off-season place in San Diego -- her hometown. The two have been dating since July.

Congrats, kids.

-- Christie D'Zurilla

Related mushy-mush kissy-kiss and Carrie Prejean dispatches (or just click here if you're the bitter type):

'When in Rome' stars Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard are engaged!

Katy Perry and Russell Brand, engaged and adorable

Carrie Underwood engaged to hockey player Mike Fisher

New Year's Eve 2009: Parties, pampering, diets and more!

Hollywood is gearing up for a fantastic 2010, and the Ministry has been keeping tabs on all your favorite celebs: where they're partying, how they're grooming and pampering for the big night, and details on those all-important ways to ward off the holiday weight.

Check out what some familiar and fabulous faces -- including Nicole Richie, Lady Gaga, Adam Lambert, Jay-Z, Rihanna and Kristin Cavallari -- are all doing as they gear up for the big ball drop at midnight ...

Enough Carrie Prejean news to make your head explode

Carrie Prejean, we wanna party with you.

Relaxing our way into the weekend, we are taking in the full scope of the land mines that have appeared around you since last we spoke. And we didn't speak that long ago, dear.

First, Carrie, there was that visit with Larry King.

In terms of walk-offs, your effort fell somewhere between when Kanye West's mom's surgeon walked off King's show, and when Usher didn't walk but did end his interview early after King's Michael Jackson questions went where Usher didn't want them to go.

Some advice: If you're going to make a bold statement, commit to it. Want to walk off? Then walk the heck off! Throw something while you're at it! Even if it's only a tear-stained, wadded-up tissue! (Sadly, they don't travel far, we've learned). 

Also: The big dogs won't take you seriously if you fight back with "that's inappropriate," or even "that's very inappropriate." The "Carrie is polite" ship has sailed. We recommend something along the lines of, "Is that the best question you can come up with, old man? C'mon, even Sean 'What do you tell young girls?' Hannity could do better. You drop your faux shock and I'll drop mine."

So, back to that mine field ...

Carrie Prejean, solo: 'It was me in the tape'

Is a sex tape still a sex tape if you're the only person in it? And will Carrie Prejean, like President Clinton before her, redefine a particular sexual behavior for generations to come?

I'd imagine that more than a few people reading this item would like to know.

Just, you know, for the record.

“You can call it whatever you want to call it. If you want to call it a sex tape, that’s fine,” Prejean told Meredith Vieira on Tuesday's "Today" show.

"It was me, by myself. There was no one else with me. I was not having sex. I sent it to my boyfriend at the time. I was a teenager. I cared about him. I trusted him. And ... the main point is that there has been a campaign against me to try and silence me ... for the answer that I gave at the pageant," said Prejean, who is promoting her new book, "Still Standing."

Regarding fallout from the "sexting" video: “Did I think it would come back now and haunt me? No. But I think that a lot of young people can learn from this. Nothing is private anymore. Nothing is private."

The interview also touches on her dropped lawsuit against Miss USA pageant officials (mediation means that details are, ironically, private), Donald Trump's "hot or not" meet and greet, and what Prejean refers to as her being "Palinized" in the media.

"If people want to call me a hypocrite, that's their prerogative," she said. "But you know what, I've learned from my mistakes. ... I think it's all about taking responsibility for your mistakes."

Now that so many have easy access to video and still cameras for personal use -- and the means to instantly transmit any images captured -- the former Miss California USA is evolving into an odd sort of role model indeed.

File under "cautionary tales."

-- Christie D'Zurilla

Related dispatches from the Ministry of Gossip's Beauty Pageants Division:

Miss England (past/present) could teach Carrie Prejean a thing or two

Mario Lopez to host Miss America -- will they add a lingerie round?

Carrie Prejean and the Miss Universe pageant call it a draw

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Miss England (past/present) could teach Carrie Prejean a thing or two

We've avoided the whole Carrie Prejean sex tape allegations to this point -- because, well, who doesn't have a sex tape these days -- but we mention it now in passing in the wake of news that appears to prove that Prejean is a rank amateur in the scandal department.

England's Miss World representative, Rachel Christie was just stripped of her crown after allegedly starting a bar brawl with Miss Manchester at an "adult themed party." Christie, an Olympic track and field hopeful and the first black Miss England, is alleged to have done this all while wearing an angel costume.

As one witty person said over the weekend on Twitter: "I think this automatically makes her Miss Ireland."

That sort of brawling takes a whole lot more effort than posing for a webcam and doing naughty things. Or rather, a whole lot more effort than we would assume it would take to pose for a webcam and do naughty things.

You know, if we knew about things like that. 

Probably not as much effort, however, as it takes to put out a book, as Prejean is doing (with an excerpt published online Sunday night).

Read on for a Prejean-related poll and to find out who's replacing Rachel Christie.

Photo: No matter how hard  you look, you won't see Rachel Christie among the Miss World 2009 contestants photographed at London's Grosvenor House Hotel on Nov. 9, 2009. Credit: Ian Gavan / Getty Images.