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Robert Pattinson on KStew, Charlie Sheen and the elephant in the room

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Robert Pattinson is back! Well, he never really left; we were just a little busy with the Oscars, Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez, and wrangling that infrequent bit of sleep.

But we’re wide awake now that Pattinson covers the March issue of Vanity Fair, casually wrapping a baby alligator around his shoulders for a photograph by Annie Leibovitz.

See, strong and sensitive — and predictably in love with his costar.

No, not Kristen Stewart. Pattinson tells the mag mag he’s head over heels for Tai, the several-thousand-pound ingenue who appears with him and Reese Witherspoon in ‘Water for Elephants.’

‘She was the best actor I ever worked with in my life,’ he said. ‘I cried when the elephant was wrapped. I never cried when anyone else was wrapped.’

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Not that his thing for Tai has him scrimping on praise for his ‘Twilight’ costar.

‘She’s cool. Even before I knew her I thought she was a really good actress. Like, I saw ‘Into the Wild,’ and I thought she was really good in that. I still think there are very few girls in her class that are as good as she is,’ he said.

Pattinson even had a little love for the latest elephant in the room, Charlie Sheen, who’s imploding on a home-grown media extravaganza now that ‘Two and a Half Men’ — one of the few shows RPattz said he watches on repeat — has been canned for the rest of the season.

At the time of the VF interview, Pattinson had a certain appreciation for ‘crazy people who don’t give [a hoot].’ Still, he said he would never indulge in Sheen’s ‘little escapades.’

Plus who knows if Sheen-style ‘goddesses’ would play nice with a pachyderm.

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Charlie Sheen on ‘Good Morning America,’ ‘Today’: ‘Dying is for fools ... amateurs’

— Matt Donnelly
Twitter.com/MattDonnelly

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