Charlie Sheen gives advice: Stay off the crack, unless you can manage it socially

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Charlie Sheen had some words of advice Monday: ‘Don’t do crack, drink chocolate milk.’

‘Don’t do crack’ was a recurring theme in his nearly half-hour sports-talk radio interview with ‘The Dan Patrick Show,’ during which Sheen described the current ‘Two and a Half Men’ hiatus as ‘forced’ and declared himself ‘peeing clean’ and ready to work.

In good spirits after noting that his voice sounded ‘like Demi Moore in her 80s, what’s up with that?’ Sheen cracked wise through most of the interview.

‘If I’m not a ‘Got Milk?’ campaign right now -- stay away from the crack, drink chocolate milk,’ he said, invoking the beverage he was quaffing when he gave a pep talk to the UCLA baseball team Thursday after hitting a few balls with them in batting practice.

‘People kind of know that I’ve had some problems lately,’ he said, so with little time to prepare his message to the guys, ‘... I said, stay away from the crack.

‘Which I think is pretty good advice, unless you can manage it socially, Dan. If you can manage it socially, then go for it. But not a lot of people can.’

Sheen admitted his own attempts to be a social crack user ‘kind of blew up in my face. Like an exploding crack pipe, Dan.’

The actor reportedly has an addiction team assembled to work with him at home.

Patrick had to ask: How long has Sheen been sober?

‘I’ve been off -- well, I don’t use ‘sober’ anymore, I’m not in AA, I don’t believe in it. ... It’s hard to say, ‘cause then you got people arguing the disease model, and the alcoholic model -- these guys, sober 20 years, [who say] ‘I’m an alcoholic.’ ‘Bro, you haven’t had a drink in two decades. What are you talking about?’ ‘

You can hear the whole interview, in which Sheen talks a lot of baseball and gets kind of flirty with Patrick -- in a sports-guy way -- here. Sheen’s sitcom went on hiatus when the actor wound up hospitalized after 36 hours of partying with porn stars on the tail end of weeks of similarly raucous behavior. He’s expected to return to work at the end of February, his rep said.

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-- Christie D’Zurilla