Robert Pattinson shares a few freewheeling details -- you listening, John Mayer?

In the March issue of Details magazine, cover boy Robert Pattinson steps right up to what could've been the edge of John Mayer territory -- then cleverly walks away from that line, demonstrating that it's possible to discuss lady parts, man parts, porn and more without ending up thrown to the media wolves.

One tip: Don't run your mouth for years in advance like some sort of new-age, "meta-aware," cooler-than-all-of-us Twitter prophet.

Some other takeaway guidelines we gleaned from reading the interview:

-- If you say you want to snort something, let it be wasabi peas, not Jessica Simpson.

-- If someone's going to use an old-fangled word for black people, let it be the interviewer, not you.

-- It's OK to mention your man parts as long as you don't ascribe political beliefs to them.

-- If you're going to discuss porn, discuss the quaintness of '80s porn compared with the no-holds-barred smut fest that's available now, rather than relishing the fact that you can see 300 anonymous private parts online before you get out of bed in the morning.

-- If you're going to admit that sudden fame (and the attendant gabillions of interviews that come with something like "The Twilight Saga") gave you a  sense that you had "a responsibility to be fascinating," rather than attempting to be fascinating for fascinating's sake -- or as some would say, embarking on a  "quest to be clever" -- draw a parallel to an interest you once had in becoming a political speech writer. Which is sort of fascinating.

-- If you in the past possessed mad confidence, and admit to it, show that you now realize some folks might know more about some things (say, your career choices) than you might: "[Y]ou have to figure out whether the way you think at 19 or 20 has any value. And eventually I understood, with all that control, which was probably illusory, I wasn't progressing. So now I'm relinquishing a bit."

-- Tell endearing stories about experiences with elephants.

-- Talk about how much you love your dog.

-- And, finally, don't kiss and tell. 

"As an actor," he tells the magazine, "you can elevate the human condition or cheapen it. I would assume it's the same with anything you do -- you try to elevate and maybe someday you will."

Pattinson's Details interview is geared to adults -- we'll link you to the one page without an f-bomb -- but it's an interesting read.

And now we know that elephants purr.

-- Christie D'Zurilla

Photo credit: Summit Entertainment

Click here and scroll down for lots of posts from the Robert Pattinson genre. And if you've missed recent John Mayer dispatches, here's a heaping helping:

PREACH IT! John Mayer stops tweeting, leaves us with Tila Tequila

John Mayer and Playboy, Part 2: The self-loathing Twitterpology

John Mayer opens his mouth to Playboy and makes our brain hurt

John Mayer in Rolling Stone: Not over Jennifer Aniston, but an innovator in masturbation

John Mayer back on Twitter; year 2010 now free to proceed

John Mayer equates dating with shame, presses on somehow

PREACH IT! Why pay for cable when you can watch celebrity Twitter wars for free?

Follow the Ministry of Gossip on Facebook and Twitter (we're @LATcelebs). Become a fan at facebook.com/ministryofgossip.

Comments

[Georeanne]

What a breath of fresh air. Finally someone who took the time to really read the article and not just the phrases that met their needs. Like it or hate it, there is nothing untoward in the article. I am glad the writer chose to take the high road and not the cheap, easy route.

[denise]

What a strange young man.

[sosad]

the l.a. times officially has zero credibility. the man said--i hate vaginas. i'm allergic to vaginas.

[CDZ from the Ministry]

@sosad -- Christie D'Zurilla here from the Ministry. Yes, Pattinson said that -- in the context of describing how he was unprepared for the reality of a long photo shoot surrounded by naked female models. I chose to assume he was adding some humor to the conversation and not channeling actual hatred, especially because the interview was conducted by a woman.

John Mayer, on the other hand, has professed to love the same female body part, but he said it in the context of being able to see images of 300 of them on the Internet one after the other.

I think there's a contrast there.

//cdz

[Polly]

To the people upset about the vagina comment. It.was.a.joke. A British one apparently. Rob gave a great interview and I'm glad most normal people who can read were able to comprehend what he was saying. Sadly we live in a world of sound bites. Rob doesn't do sound bites nor should he. You have to and will indeed want to hear everything he has to say . Thank you for giving him a fair and honest review. I only wish I liked the photos that went with the article better. They didn't capture him at all.

[elephant]

Your article is hilarious and I couldn't stop laughing. The interview in Details actually touched me in certain way. He mentioned he had to loosen his mind a little so he could be "progressing". I agree with it totally and may use it for my own life. Thanks a lot. He's pretty smart and a good thinker. Rarely to see that kind of quality in such a young actor in U.S. Cannot believe he's only 23. So mature than many people.

[Georgeanne]

Thank you Ms. D'Zurilla for taking the time to respond to the posters. I appreciate that you are paying attention rather than allowing incorrect conclusions to stand as fact and build upon themselves.

[Chris]

Brava!!! Loved your take on the Pattinson Details interview. He says he felt he needed to be fascinating early on, but I contend he didn't need to try very hard. From this interview I'd say he is fascinating without even trying. And what a refreshing change to have someone report on the Details article that seems to have actually read it. Seems reading comprehension is not a requirement of graduation these days. Thanks for taking the time to know what you were writing about. It's kind of a lost art these days. Take a bow. :)

[Jamie]

Jane the last time i checked, Details is a men's mag... commenting about vagina is "normal" on that mag... at least now i know, Rob fans are far more intelligent that the haters.....

[elephant]

Sometimes I feel people are so easy to be fooled by headlines. So native. Like a no brainer. They jump to conclusion immediately without reading context. At least after having read the headlines, I went to check out the interview in Details and enjoyed the whole interview.

Besides, come on, we're adults, so be adults. Learn to laugh at certain things. Don't be so frigid. Take it easy. I don't think Europeans would be so fussy about a joking V comment.

[Linda]

Thank you for your take on the article. I couldn't agree more. I love Robert Pattinson. He is obviously an intelligent young man who is a bit overwhelmed by his fame. I took the vagina comment as a joke as i am sure he meant it. I don't understand why people want to tear him down. i hope he has huge successes with his new movies.

I didn't think much of the interviewer in the Details article - it seemed like she tried to take sound bites and pieces for a more sensational article. I wish Robert Pattinson the best!

[Dave]

I'm allergic to vaginas,too. It's called homosexuality and Beandryl won't work.

[Dave]

That's Benadryl, sorry.

[Renee]

Pattinson should go back into modeling. He can stand there and just look pretty and keep his ridiculous mouth shut.

[CGabriel]

Re Robert's vagina comment...It's an old British joke which goes like this:

A man goes to the doctor. Says, "DOCTOR DOCTOR, I hate vaginas; I think i am allergic to them."

Doctor, "Why do you think that sir?"

Man, "Because every time I am near them, I get terribly swollen and need to rub."

I hope this helps clarify his statement. It was a joke, not meant to insult women but explain what he felt like during the 12 hour photoshoot surrounded by naked women.

[Beautiful and Graceful]

@Christie D'Zurilla - Consider whoever you owed a favor to for writing a favorable article about Rob’s comments paid-in-full for the next century. Rob's use of the N-word and his V comments are offensive to me as a Black woman. His interviewer (who is Black) loses creditability for bring up the N-word in the first place. Both Rob and his interviewer should realize that the NAACP had a funeral for the N-word. There was no reason for the N-word to be used in the interview in any context. To my regret I have prepaid for the New Moon DVD. I'm trying to cancel my order and get my money back. Rob and Mayer are stupid.

[janey]

Someone said on another board that quirkiness for quirkiness sake is no less annoying than just a bland celebrity interview. I couldn't agree more. This Details interview reeks of Robert's desperation to be edgy and intellectual. His attempt at making a joke of hating women's vaginas because he is allergic backfired because he doesn't have the experience to use such an old and tired joke and so it was taken literally. The elephant story could have been endearing, but coupled with the vagina comment makes it a whole different scenario. He now has a label of possibly being gay. It only goes to show how a celeb's personna can be changed in an instant, and make no mistake, this was one of these moments. I thought the Details interview was a total disaster and I think could possibly change this young actor's popularity in the long run.

[CDZ from the Ministry]

@Beautiful and Graceful -- Christie D'Zurilla here from the blog (I'm the one who approves the bulk of comments, incidentally -- nothing here is published automatically).

In the post above, I called it as I saw it. I owed nobody a "favor," as you suggest, and nothing has been "paid-in-full." Your opinion and interpretation of the Details article are different from mine -- that's how it goes. There is a certain irony, however, in the worst being assumed of me when it comes to why I wrote what I wrote.

Thanks for taking the time to read this blog and to voice your opinion.

//cdz

[maria]

Robert is the next Joaquin Phoenix. He too, was handsome,shy, weird, popular(albeit much more talented) and started drinking and smoking weed a little too much until he went off the deep end. Robert came across as very insensitive to women, African-Americans(don't think he is racist just stupid) and his girlfriend(his dog? Really?) I really think this guy needs to take a few deep breaths,slow down, admit that his stubborness and refusal to tone down his interviews is really going to hurt his career and needs to get some really good PR people to help him. He needs it. It's time.

[Aro]

@Beautiful and Graceful: Did you even bother to *read* the article? The "N" word was never, not once used in it, by either Pattinson or the writer. The word used was in fact "Negro" and it was used in a perfectly acceptable manner given the context (which if you bother to read, you'll note). I too am a Black woman, and had that word come out of his mouth, that would have been the end of my tolerance let alone any admiration for Pattinson. Please don't spread slanderous gossip. Let's attribute the real ignorant comments to the John Mayers of the world.

[AnnewithanE]

Here's the British joke that some have alluded to.
Man tells doctor he's allergic to vagina. Why? Because when he's near one, he swells up, turns red and wants to rub. Being allergic to something doesn't mean you don't like it. It means you have a "reaction" to it. And he was around two naked models for a 12 hr. photo shoot. It was a joke people. I've read and listened to many interviews with this guy over the past year and he's an original, that's for sure; intelligent, thought provoking, fall down on the floor funny with just a brilliant, skewered way of looking at the world. He's not your typical, phoney, cookie cutter young Hollywood star. There's a real genuine quality to this kid, the way his mind works, his perception of things. Hard to believe he's only 23 years old.

[stirling]

I thought this was a very strange article about an odd young man. Very handsome but very odd. He really seems unstable. Maybe he isn't but that is how he looks here. And I can't be the only one who thought Jenny Lumet did him no favors by mentioning how much he had to drink, to the point of saying "Beer 1" "Beer 2" "Beer 3" etc. What was her point? And asking if he was okay to make it home? Did we really need to know this? Isn't she some sort of friend to him? Who needs enemies? I also felt she set him up with the N word.

[Maria]

I really appreciate that for once, someone actually read Robert Pattinsons interview with Details and took the introspective approach and shed some good light on him. I love to hear his thoughts! He's such an interesting and unique person. Unlike anyone out there today. The interview was one of the best I've read thus far and he's had some pretty good ones. So many people are fascinated with Rob for many reasons other than just what started out as a handsome, fairy tale like character brought to life by him. His true fans are not just fans of Twilight but of the man himself and of his work. He is funny, clever, intelligent, exceptionally talented and yes, humble. That's why we cannot get enough of him! To top it all off he's incredibly beautiful inside and out...almost too good to be true. I think were going to see some great work to come from Mr Pattinson. Can't wait! It's terrible that several sites only picked out the negative when there was so much more...So, thanks.

[patty]

my impression overall of this guy is a very good one, so it's sad to me that people on the boards generally (not here, the only place where it counts -- I love and trust my LA Times) are so willing to tear into him, esp. as he's been patiently dealing with crazy fans for a few years now...i feel pretty silly even commenting here as i'm not really anybody's fan; i'm more a fan of pop culture in general and like to catch the waves of whatever's going on. but i just feel sorry for this young actor at this point. it's like he's been at the center of some crazy storm for two years and everyone has their attention focused on him; they either love him or hate him, too much. if you read the article, you get an impression of a shy, smart, sensitive, and sweet young guy who is dealing with the craziness of sudden megastardom as best he can. i think we're lucky to have him. and thanks to you, Christie, for being a welcome voice of sanity in this little dust-up.

[pixie]

To Janey...ITA...head on over to CNN.com and see the bashing RP is getting...numerous posts that say he is a gay drunk porn addicted idiot who loves his dog a little too much...men and women are saying this. He is known for saying what he wants off the top of his head and refuses a publicist...well, he may be digging his own grave. He is too young to get away with the vagina comment...does he think he's Clooney? and is too naive in the biz to act like he has been and it will bite him in the butt.