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Adam Lambert: An ex-fat, ex-closeted, ex-redhead who’s ‘very normal’ on ‘Chelsea Lately’ -- and funny too

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It’s one thing to hear Adam Lambert sing. Another to watch him spontaneously smooch a guy while performing on national TV. And it’s yet another to hear him sit down and chat it out like a ‘very normal’ person, as he did with Chelsea Handler on Wednesday night.

As his fans know, the apparently too-hot-to-touch Adam can actually -- gasp! -- speak in full sentences, crack self-aware jokes in his own sarcastic vein and be calmly and coolly forthcoming about things in his life that some might find scandalous or unexpected.

His low-key advice Wednesday night on ‘Chelsea Lately’? ‘Protect the children.’

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Protect them from what, exactly?

Best we can figure, they need protecting from discussions of drugs (he talks about tripping on acid while plotting the course of his pre-’Idol’ career, and about how Rolling Stone took liberties with the story), of gays (he needles Chelsea for making the classic ‘all gays like all gays’ faux pas when knee-jerk introducing him, during the interview, to her ‘staff homosexual’) and of trips one may or may not have taken with Paula Abdul and Randy Jackson (there weren’t any).

And, hey, do we need to save the children from Lady Gaga? Probably not. According to Adam and Chelsea, the singer takes herself very seriously.

So about that red hair -- it’s long gone: ‘Opie doesn’t do rock ‘n’ roll.’

Wise choice, Adam.

-- Christie D’Zurilla

P.S. This New Year’s Eve you can catch Adam headlining the Gridlock event at Paramount Studios in L.A., benefiting the American Red Cross. It might even be televised.

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Looks as if the Ministry of Gossip is a little obsessed with Adam Lambert:

Adam Lambert manages no controversy, mucho swag at Z100 Jingle Ball Barbara Walters’ ‘10 Most Fascinating People of 2009’: observations, and a poll

PREACH IT! Just for you, ABC, a post about Adam Lambert that is Totally Not Gay

[UPDATED] ‘Jimmy Kimmel Live,’ ‘New Year’s Rockin’ Eve’ cancel Adam Lambert‘The View’ breaks down Adam Lambert’s AMA performance [VIDEO]

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Adam Lambert performs ‘Whataya Want From Me’ on Letterman’s show. World does not end.

Adam Lambert on ‘The Early Show’ -- no apologies, and a visit from Mom [VIDEO]

Adam Lambert was ‘really in the moment’ when he kissed a guy on the AMAs

Adam Lambert at the AMAs: Could we see this performance coming?

Poll: Adam Lambert’s AMA performance: provocative or porn?

Want the headlines? Follow the Ministry of Gossip on Facebook and Twitter (we’re @LATcelebs on Twitter). We just got a new address on Facebook -- find us at facebook.com/ministryofgossip.

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