IRAQ: Bringing up baby — online

Everyone knows about Internet chatting and shopping. But have you heard about Web-based-parenting?

Not long ago, you could find me every week in the baby supplies sections of our local Baghdad supermarket, stocking up on milk and diapers for my 3-year-old son, Omar, and 1-year-old daughter, Miriam.

But things have gotten so dangerous here that I decided to send my family out of the country for their safety.

Now, when I go to the supermarket, I still instinctively stop in that section and have to remind myself that my kids are no longer here with me. Every two months, I go to visit them for a week. The day I leave is always the happiest day for me; the day I get back is always the worst.

The only way I have to see my family on a regular basis is through a webcam I set up on my office computer. The first time we did this, Omar kept staring at my image on the screen saying, "Papa? What are you doing in Mom's computer?" Then he would look behind the monitor to see if I was hiding there.

Another day, my wife called over the Internet and said in an exasperated tone, "Papa! Talk to Omar. He won't stop punching Miriam." Then Omar came online saying, "Papa, she punched me first." I told him, "She is your younger sister. You should take care of her, not beat her." So he apologized and kissed her, and I went back to work.

A couple of days ago, Omar asked me on one of these calls, "Papa, why don't you come here?" I told him that I have to work in order to buy him lots of toys. So he said, "Why don't you come here, and I will work instead?" That gave me a shock. I realized that Omar and Miriam are growing up fast, and I am missing their childhood.

— Mohammed Rasheed in Baghdad

Comments

[telosmonos]

Mohammed,

I commend you for the sacrifice that you and your family have made, so that you may continue to ply your trade honourably amidst the uncertainty and instability of Iraq.

That said, for the love of God, man, get the hell out of there and get back to your family. Yes, we will lose critically-needed perspective on what is happening there. And I say chuck it - we'll manage, one way or the other. Your little ones and your wife need you, as much as you need them.

The forlorn feeling that knaws at the pit of your stomach upon returning to Baghdad to work, that feeling that nothing is right until you are able to embrace your children and tuck them into bed or simply hold your wife - it wears away the lining of one's heart and sanity.

I left military service years before even meeting my wife, so that I could be there each night for the family I know was waiting in my future. Whatever my struggles and grievances may be, I know am blessed in being able to read bedtime stories to my son each night, to make small talk with my wife in the minutes before going to bed - simple recounting of the day, how the children are faring at school - all those little things that seem like almost nothing but are everything.

The tragedy of Iraq will continue to grind away the life of nearly every human being there. Don't let it grind away yours, and that of your family. The moments you miss - there's no making up for them. The best you can do is be there for the ones you can.

Get back to them ASAP. Don't think twice and don't regret it. Just GO.

Godspeed

[Not Important]

Damn man... this post made me cry like a sissy! My heart goes out to you man.